Whenever my able-bodied husband goes out in public no matter where it is (but usually stores) he is always running into rude, obnoxious, ignorant and stupid people. Even the customer service people seem to treat him like crap. And he lets them bother him to no end (hours later). I try to tell him to not let them get to him as much as they do but it is very hard for him because they piss him off so much.  Even the stuff that we receive in the mail over and over and over adds to the stress.

Ironically, I have exactly the opposite problem. People flock to me like flies on poop!  People are always ready to open doors for me, help me shop, strike up a conversation, etc. etc. etc. etc.. And ever since I began taking my service dog with me into stores I actually have to count on "extra time" for being in the store (or a half-hour longer shopping trip in a store) because people are always coming up to me and want to talk about my dog or their dogs or just conversation in general. I don't mind it but sometimes I just want to carry on.

You have brought this up before, Bobbie, so I think you let it bother you too much like my husband does. Despite it being very hard not to drive you crazy.  And it sounds like you live in an area full of ignorant people who are uncomfortable with people with disabilities. Some of the suggestions on here (especially W's first response) are good ones. So if you really want to be noticed then you have to go out of your way to make them aware of you.  You have been disabled for a long long time so this should not be a revelation to you.

Sometimes when people move from one place to another they notice a big difference in the people in the new place.  For the better or for the worse.  For example, my husband lived in Houston, Texas when we were dating and the Internet and he moved to New York state to marry me and to live.  He was so he used to the Southern hospitality that he was constantly bombarded with what he noticed as extremely rude New Yorkers.  Having lived in upstate New York my entire life I simply did not notice what he did.

But if you have lived in the same place most of your life, Bobbie, you should be used to it, no?

But, boy, do I wish that either being ignored by people or being inundated with people was on my list of things to worry about! For the last five years my health has outdone anything. From two major wounds that put me in bed almost a year total to several back-to-back UTIs. In my recent diagnosis with big bladder stones. And for the final icing on the cake---I have been having problems with the cerebral spinal fluid from syringomyelia that I have not had in over eight years. I just need a big break from all these troubles that seem to happen spontaneously!

Lori---you want to start having some fun in your life? Oh no! This body of yours is going to wreak havoc upon any of your plans!

So either shrug it off as ignorance, Bobbie, or make yourself known like many have suggested here. You have to make the difference.

Lori

 -------Original Message-------

 
Date: 03/20/06 10:58:15
Subject: Re: [QUAD-L] Being ignored
 
ATTA BOY, Mark!
You deserve a standing ovation for that performance, lol!
 
I prefer to tell the waiter or waitress that I am paying the bill for tonite's treat,
and your tip will depend on how well I am served.  Then sit back and enjoy the
fun. Again, its priceless.
(from one actor to another, kudos!)
Best Performance
W
 
 
 
In a message dated 3/20/2006 11:46:39 AM Central Standard Time, [EMAIL PROTECTED] writes:
Bobbie,
You need to tell your friends ahead of time to play along when this happens and act touched in the head when they're being rude so you can say "Yes we're done I just thought I'd get her out of the institution for the day but I need  to hurry before her medication wears off" and try to pay with Mastercard because the look on their face is "Priceless"
 
Mark
 
 

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