Bill, "Concern parenting," what does that mean, what does that entail. It
means, or
should mean, I'm serving the cares and needs of my child. What are those
needs? They
certainly aren't mine; they certainly are not the same for any two children in
the same
family. One size of concerned parenting certainly does fit all children. God,
do I know
that. So, as a concern parent, I must be empathetic, sympathetic, loving. I'd
listen
because however a concern parent I may be, I know I don't know it all; I'm not
prepared to
deal with every situation. If I am a truly concerned parent, I know I can
always improve
my parenting. I know that parenting is a constant state of adaptation. As a
concerned
parent, I must be a constant listener, a constant see-er, a constant quester, a
constant
learner, a constant reflector, a constant examiner. As a concerned parent, I'd
know that
I don't always get is right and that I must learn from my screw ups and be
ready to change
my ways. As a concerned parent, I know that parenting isn't about me; it's
about my
constantly changing child and her or his constantly changing needs which I must
know,
respect, and serve because they demand constantly changing parenting. It's that
communication thing. Concern parenting, than, is a journey, often an adventure
into the
unknown. It's not a fixed destination. It is not easy, comfortable,
convenient, or safe.
To paraphrase an age old axiom, perfect parenting is the enemy of good
parenting.
Inflexibility is no friend of betterment. Or, as George Will so rightly wrote,
certainty,
especially of the obstinate, unreflective, judgmental variety, usually screws
things up,
protests to the contrary. No, we may not like the challenge we hear, but we
should hear
it for the purposes of information, education, elucidation, and affirmation.
In fact, we
should welcome it and embrace it rather than try to avoid it. We are not,
should not,
must not be above self-reflection, challenge, question, self-examination,
criticism,
change, improvement. If we don't or can't or won't, then that is a reflection
of and
perhaps a revealing of the true nature of our supposed concerned parenting. To
quote the
Bard, "fault, dear Brutus, is not in our stars, but in ourselves."
Make it a good day.
--Louis--
Louis Schmier www.therandomthoughts.com
Department of History www.newforums.com/L_Schmier.htm
Valdosta State University
Valdosta, Georgia 31698 /\ /\ /\ /\
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mountains \ /\
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hills" -/
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