"The good news is the federal government is now going to provide loans
directly to U.S. corporations. The bad news is those loans will come in
the form of food stamps."
- Jake Novak
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Give money to the poor and call it welfare, but then give money to the
rich and call it a "bailout," or a "rescue?
What's wrong with this picture....?
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
He Feels So Bad....
http://picayune.uclick.com/comics/cwjmo/2008/cwjmo081009.gif
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"President Bush gave a speech today about the economy and he said that he
believes that 'anyone who makes bad decisions should fail.' Then Bush
looked around the room and said, 'Hey, why did it get so quiet in here?'"
- Conan O'Brien
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Weren't *YOU* 'Sposed To....
http://picayune.uclick.com/comics/tt/2008/tt081009.gif
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"President Bush went on television to calm Wall Street Monday, prompting
the Dow Jones to plummet. The more he talks the worse it gets. After eight
hard fought innings, President Bush now leads al-Qaeda by a score of three
bank buildings to two."
- Argus Hamilton
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Free Money!!!
http://picayune.uclick.com/comics/wpswi/2008/wpswi081008.gif
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
The Modern Republican "Free Market":
- Profits are privatized
- Risks are socialized
- Supply is monopolized
- Competition is consolidated
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Probably Not Enough, Either....
http://picayune.uclick.com/comics/tmssa/2008/tmssa081005.gif
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"President Bush went on the air Tuesday to assure America that the economy
will recover and improve eventually. He needs to work on his pep talks.
The Dow Jones fell a hundred points when he said we have nothing to fear
but some very scary things."
- Argus Hamilton
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Next....
http://picayune.uclick.com/comics/tmdho/2008/tmdho081008.gif
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
The Dow Jones Industrial Average was 10,587.59 on the day George W. Bush
was first sworn into office, Jan. 20, 2001. In the last wek alone:
October 3, 2008 closing: 10325.38 (- 157.47)
October 6, 2008 closing: 9,955.50 (- 369.88)
October 7, 2008 closing: 9,447.11 (- 508.39)
October 8, 2008 closing: 9,258.10 (- 189.01)
October 9, 2008 closing: 8,579.19 (- 678.91)
Down nearly 1750 points.....
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"The bad news: The Dow dropped 500 points today. The good news: I didn't
know there were 500 left."
- Stephen Colbert, "The Colbert Report"
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"The Wall Street Journal said Tuesday's sell-off could have been much
worse. The obituary page listed only three deaths. One trader had a heart
attack at eighty-two, one had kidney failure at seventy-five, and the
other had Lehman Brothers at sixty-six."
- Argus Hamilton
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
He's Huge!!!
http://picayune.uclick.com/comics/crsbr/2008/crsbr081005.gif
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"The economy is so bad, I went to check my 401 K, and they told me I only
have 01 K's left."
- Pedro Bartes
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Are you better off today than you were 4 weeks ago?
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Puzzle Time
http://picayune.uclick.com/comics/tt/2008/tt081008.gif
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"President Bush signed the Wall Street bailout bill into law Friday and
thanked Congress. The measure is not popular. Right now people are so
angry at Washington that they can't get anybody to play the North in those
Civil War re-enactment battles."
- Argus Hamilton
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Political Impotence
http://us.cnn.com/POLITICS/analysis/toons/2008/10/01/mitchell/
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
NEWS QUIZ
1. $73.7 million and $57.2 million are, respectively:
a ) the 2007 budgets of the states of Maryland and Mississippi.
b ) the cost of feeding all refugees in Darfur last year.
c ) last year's pay packages for the Chairmen of Goldman Sachs and J.P.
Morgan Chase.
......... Hint: they both did a heckuva job.
2. The newly revised Wall Street bailout plan includes which two of the
following:
a ) invest taxpayer dollars in Main Street.
b ) save families from losing their homes.
c ) change name from "bailout" to "rescue."
d ) change Wall Street accounting rules to make worthless assets valuable
......... Hint: think Dumbo and the magic feather.
- IronicTimes.com
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Q: What do the bailout bill and a Jimmy Dean sausage have in common?
A: They're filled with green pork....
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
President ReMax
http://www.lefttoonlane.com/2008/10/president-remax.html
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"Citigroup and Wells Fargo have called a temporary truce in their legal
battle over who will take over Wachovia... mostly because neither bank can
afford lawyers right now."
- Jake Novak
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Party Time!
http://picayune.uclick.com/comics/crdpo/2008/crdpo081005.gif
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"Financial experts continue to claim this economic crisis is a crisis of
confidence. Which is odd because nobody ever had their check returned due
to insufficient confidence."
- Alex Kaseberg
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Press Briefing by Press Secretary Dana Perino
October 8, 2008
http://www.whitehouse.gov/news/releases/2008/10/20081008-2.html
Q: You mentioned earlier about the pain everybody is feeling as a result
of all this. Well, the House passed an unemployment extension bill, which
would extend unemployment for all states for seven weeks, and for those
that have high unemployment, above six percent, for an additional 13.
Would the White House support this bill?
MS. PERINO: Well, Paula, I don't even think -- Congress is not even in
session, so there's no legislation moving through Congress. We have
supported unemployment benefit extensions in the past, although we wanted
a shorter period of time than many had wanted. I don't know if there's
some people recommending a 26-week extension. We cut that back to 13 weeks
back in June. One of the reasons that we did that is because we want
people to be able to return to the workplace as soon as possible.
[THUD! .... pardon jaw hitting table]
So, Dana, you're saying that American workers -- "the fundamentals of our
economy" John McCain likes to call 'em (after that stupid gaffe, saying
"the fundamentals of our economy are strong" the same morning that we
found out all these financial companies needed bailouts) -- would stay out
of work, on unemployment, if the extension was longer?!? Because they like
to exist on THE BARE MINIMUM?!?!?
"Compassionate Conservatism" in action....
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"Are there no prisons? Are there no workhouses?"
- Ebenezer Scrooge (paraphrased)
(from "A Christmas Carol" by Charles Dickens)
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"President Bush's response to the economic crisis was to meet with small
business owners at a soda shop in San Antonio, Texas, this week. The bad
news: The small business owners are now General Motors, General Electric,
Century 21."
- Jay Leno
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Bailout Plan
http://picayune.uclick.com/comics/crmth/2008/crmth081008.gif
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"President Bush attended a GOP fundraiser in San Antonio Monday and then
stopped by a downtown lunch counter to reassure the local diners about the
stock market. His every word is magic. The president said hello to the
busboy and the dishes crashed."
- Argus Hamilton
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
New Hours
http://picayune.uclick.com/comics/tmdow/2008/tmdow081007.gif
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
John McCain has been in the Senate for decades.
He helped pass the legislation that de-regulated Wall Street into the
state you see it today.
And now, McCain is running against himself....
"I've been a reformer all my life. ... There's no doubt that I believe
strongly there's a role for government, and we have to have smart
regulation. ... I'm a Teddy Roosevelt Republican. I believe there's
clearly a role for government and my record clearly indicates that."
- Sen. John McCain [R-AZ], Pres. Candidate
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Even John McCain now thinks Republican policies aren't worth
supporting....
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"I'm a reformer. Look at my record. People like me."
- Johnny Mac
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
It's kinda strange: the "Maverick" goes to Washington to fight for a bill
that had no earmarks, but after his involvement we get one with $100B
worth?
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"This is not the failed Republican economy you're looking for...."
- McJedi Mind Trick
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"John McCain startled GOP debate viewers Tuesday by proposing a government
plan to prop up home values to help solve the mortgage mess. The signs at
his rallies all say Country First. Even his campaign slogan sounds like a
failed savings and loan."
- Argus Hamilton
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"Six days after the government rescued AIG with an $85 billion loan, the
insurance company spent $443,000 on a week-long trip for agents... but
that was just what it cost to gas up the tour bus."
- Jake Novak
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
SUCKERS!!!
http://us.cnn.com/POLITICS/analysis/toons/2008/10/03/mitchell/
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Bush Spokeswoman 'Outraged' By AIG Junket
http://afp.google.com/article/ALeqM5gKGBkg4DguI_k2NcQm5JemW44fcA
President George W. Bush's chief spokeswoman expressed outrage Wednesday
at reports that AIG executives spent hundreds of thousands of dollars on a
spa retreat after the US government rescued the firm.
"I understand why the American people would be outraged. I am. It's pretty
despicable," Dana Perino told reporters.
She spoke after US lawmakers were told that AIG spent more than 440,000
dollars for an executive getaway at a California beach resort just days
after the insurance giant was rescued by an 85-billion-dollar US
government loan. ...
Invoices showed that AIG paid the Pacific Ocean getaway resort more than
440,000 dollars, [Rep. Henry] Waxman told the committee on its second day
of hearings on the Wall Street economic crisis.
The charges included close to 200,000 dollars for rooms -- which cost
between 425 and 1,200 dollars per night -- over 150,000 for meals and
23,000 in spa charges, he said.
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Footing The Bill
http://picayune.uclick.com/comics/sc/2008/sc081008.gif
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"Mortgage finance company Fannie Mae said it is forgiving the mortgage
debt of a 90-year-old woman who shot herself in the chest as sheriff's
deputies attempted to evict her. When he heard the news, Ed McMahon went
immediately shopping for a gun."
- Pedro Bartes
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Great News!
http://thehill.com/images/stories/weyants/2008/October/cartoon100708.jpg
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"Good news, everybody. That house you couldn't pay for? You're paying for
it. The House on Friday passed the $700 billion Wall Street bailout
package. President Bush then signed the bill into law after consulting
with his economic advisers, M.C. Hammer, Ed McMahon and Willie Nelson."
- Seth Meyers, SNL "Weekend Update"
**************
C'mon Along!!!
http://picayune.uclick.com/comics/crjsh/2008/crjsh081006.gif
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