--- >i unconsciously fall back into my old way of thinking and thats 
what 
> gets me in trouble with myself. i know i must beaware of my 
thoughts 
> but i often drift away. 

    It's perfectly normal to have difficulty in subjugation of the 
mental processes. You are not alone. At least you are aware of your 
thoughts; when that happens, simply put yourself back on track. No 
biggie. In time it should become natural, but it takes practice. 

    Also, you made the comment that it gets you in trouble with 
yourself. Please don't beat yourself up. Give yourself time, and 
when you make "mistakes", see them as learning experiences rather 
than failure. Ask yourself why it happened, that should cue you into 
the heart of the problem. Peace and happiness, Guy. 
> >      
> > > 
> > > 
> > > 
> > > i to have noticed what your talking about, Guy. i would like 
to 
> > think 
> > > that i want to be a better human being rather than pump up my 
ego 
> > by 
> > > thinking im right. i believe what i want to accomplish is to 
get 
> > rid 
> > > of my ego for that is the root of all evil. i think people in 
> here 
> > > have good intentions but their ego's get in the way. i couldnt 
> > give 
> > > anyone instruction on zen for i am but a novice student of it 
and 
> > > life. my laziness prevents me from coming in here often but 
the 
> > last 
> > > time i was here there seemed to be ego's clashing and to me 
that 
> > > doesnt make sense for people practicing zen. i will continue 
to 
> > read 
> > > material here and hopefully be able to filter the good from 
the 
> > not 
> > > so good. Mack





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