--- In [email protected], "ventouxboy" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
> 
> --- >i unconsciously fall back into my old way of thinking and 
thats 
> what 
> > gets me in trouble with myself. i know i must beaware of my 
> thoughts 
> > but i often drift away. 
> 
>     It's perfectly normal to have difficulty in subjugation of the 
> mental processes. You are not alone. At least you are aware of your 
> thoughts; when that happens, simply put yourself back on track. No 
> biggie. In time it should become natural, but it takes practice. 
> 
>     Also, you made the comment that it gets you in trouble with 
> yourself. Please don't beat yourself up. Give yourself time, and 
> when you make "mistakes", see them as learning experiences rather 
> than failure. Ask yourself why it happened, that should cue you 
into 
> the heart of the problem. Peace and happiness, Guy.


i appreciate your reply and your right about beating myself up. thats 
just one of many walls im working on breaking down. slowly but surely 
i am working towards letting life flow instead of fighting it at 
times. during the times i fight i believe my ego has taken over and 
wants things to go its way hence the conflict, instead of letting 
things go the way. i am learning that i am responsible for my 
feelings and that the outside doesnt dictate the way you feel on the 
inside.
> > >      
> > > > 
> > > > 
> > > > 
> > > > i to have noticed what your talking about, Guy. i would like 
> to 
> > > think 
> > > > that i want to be a better human being rather than pump up my 
> ego 
> > > by 
> > > > thinking im right. i believe what i want to accomplish is to 
> get 
> > > rid 
> > > > of my ego for that is the root of all evil. i think people in 
> > here 
> > > > have good intentions but their ego's get in the way. i 
couldnt 
> > > give 
> > > > anyone instruction on zen for i am but a novice student of it 
> and 
> > > > life. my laziness prevents me from coming in here often but 
> the 
> > > last 
> > > > time i was here there seemed to be ego's clashing and to me 
> that 
> > > > doesnt make sense for people practicing zen. i will continue 
> to 
> > > read 
> > > > material here and hopefully be able to filter the good from 
> the 
> > > not 
> > > > so good. Mack





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