On the same time, These situations make you trust yourself even more because You've already seen the worst.
On 3/2/17, Ajay Minocha <[email protected]> wrote: > Completely agree, This is one of its kind situation where none of your > theories of being assertive comes to your rescue. > > On 3/1/17, Payal Kapoor <[email protected]> wrote: >> and, Manish, the site is definitely inaccessible to leave a comment at. >> i tried responding to a comment left there but the reply link does not >> bring up an edit box or a prompt to sign in or anything of the ssort. >> >> On 3/1/17, Payal Kapoor <[email protected]> wrote: >>> all your points make sense Shireen, when in a situation you've >>> mentioned. this specific incident mentioned here was not conducive to >>> most of what you've suggested. yes, in other situations they could >>> definitely be adopted, but when in the situation i've mentioned, not >>> many have the time or inclination to see much beyond themselves. or >>> maybe i was dealing with a particularly reticent group. >>> the dynamic changes when in a group. why, i am still to understand. >>> the getting up from the seat is something a lot of us do i think. my >>> main concern here is the absence of initiative to even try. >>> i get the absence of eye contact bit being a problem, but there are >>> definitely other ways to combat that i'm sure. >>> >>> On 2/28/17, Shireen Irani <[email protected]> wrote: >>>> since Avinash has invited a discussion on this, here are my 2 bits on >>>> a few possible, but not necessarily optimal, solutions: of course what >>>> Payal went through is very real, and these tips are not in any way, a >>>> counter to her experience. these are just a few pointers off the top >>>> of my head that may help some1 in a particular situation, , a lot of >>>> which u all may already be aware of. >>>> 1. if i know that a particular person is going to be in the same >>>> social gathering as myself, whether from work, friends, or family >>>> members, i'd ask them a day in advance, if they'd be ok to be with me >>>> during that gathering, and accompany me during meals, etc. if i can >>>> ask more than 1 person, nothing like it. i could even divide the time, >>>> spend it half with 1 accompanist, and the other half with the other. >>>> often when the accompanist realises that he/she was not the only >>>> option, they are more eager/ willing to accompany. >>>> 2. if i'm on the same table with a group of people, and if every1 is >>>> part of a single conversation, then i too will proactively participate >>>> in that conversation, even if i am not asked something directly. i'd >>>> of course hope that i say something remotely sensible/ interesting >>>> enough for people to take notice of me, and realise that here is also >>>> a person at the table, equally part of the group. its not always >>>> possible, but it is just 1, among many strategies to use when >>>> feasible. >>>> 3. sometimes, i can be the initiator of a conversation at the table. >>>> by making some general statement about the food, or the function, >>>> something mostly positive, to which other people may be likely to >>>> respond. e.g. this biryani is really awesome! or, has any1 tried the >>>> dessert yet? >>>> 4. if i know that a particular person is sitting somewhere near me, >>>> then i can call out to her and start off a conversation for every1 to >>>> hear. e.g. Payal, i read your latest blog. it was wonderfully written! >>>> this is surely a good conversation starter, and there's very little >>>> chance that people will ignore me after that. at least not till the >>>> end of that particular conversation. >>>> of course, people sitting immediately next to me would be the simplest >>>> to start chatting to, but those conversations may not reach the rest >>>> of the group. >>>> 6. this last 1 may not be very appealing to many, but it has worked >>>> for me. if i want something and there's no1 around to call, i just get >>>> up off the chair and start walking towards nowhere. this is almost >>>> always likely for some1 to notice me and offer to help. smile. >>>> >>>> 7. i could also inform the main organiser/ host of the event, to >>>> arrange for some1 to be with me during the program and accompany me >>>> throughout. i think that often its not that people don't want to help. >>>> they just avoid it because they don't know how to initiate/ interact >>>> with the likes of us. in such cases, and from all the above points, >>>> the main thing to take home is that for better for worse, we are the >>>> ones who need to give them that slight nudge/ push, to engage/ >>>> interact with us. sadly, people haven't reached that level of >>>> sensibility yet, for them to not feel awkward around us. i in fact was >>>> reading about this just this morning. don't remember where. that >>>> children usually never find it difficult to come forward and initiate >>>> an interaction with us. it is the adults. who start building these >>>> walls as they become less sure of their own selves. and thereby, less >>>> sure of the "others". in quotation marks. so as long as we're the >>>> first to extend a hand, we can hope that we've done our bit and that >>>> the ball is no longer in our court. >>>> >>>> Shireen. >>>> >>>> On 2/28/17, avinash shahi <[email protected]> wrote: >>>>> While recounting her own experience from a professional gathering, She >>>>> flags off a burning issue; why people remain indifferent towards blind >>>>> people. >>>>> This could set a tone for further deliberation. She felt alone when >>>>> nobody turned up to offer her assistance to have a dignified meal. She >>>>> felt unpleasant cause people talked at her not to her. What are the >>>>> solutions we could offer in similar situations to us and our fellow >>>>> beings? we also go to attend marriages, parties, and clubs. Many >>>>> amongst us probably skip such gatherings due to ensuing indignities >>>>> awaiting them. This post provokes me to ponder upon what could be >>>>> prospective solutions: Is accompanying sighted to such gathering if >>>>> not invited morally justified? or demanding right to have meal in >>>>> dignified manner from the organisers is a way out? or in a conference >>>>> or in a seminar; just striking a conversation with a stranger solely >>>>> to get food is a smart strategy. I expect the Access Indians will take >>>>> the conversation further. The URL is pasted below. >>>>> http://blog.sexualityanddisability.org/2017/02/im-blind-not-invisible/ >>>>> >>>>> >>>>> >>>>> On 2/28/17, Niharika Pandit <[email protected]> wrote: >>>>>> Hello everyone, >>>>>> >>>>>> Greetings from Point of View! >>>>>> >>>>>> Today on the SexDis blog, we have published an essay 'I'm blind, not >>>>>> invisible' by Payal Kapoor. >>>>>> http://blog.sexualityanddisability.org/2017/02/im-blind-not-invisible/ >>>>>> >>>>>> 'It is great for the non-disabled to talk about us, but not with us! >>>>>> How >>>>>> then will the gap that has been created between us ever be bridged?' >>>>>> >>>>>> Happy Reading! >>>>>> >>>>>> Best, >>>>>> Niharika Pandit >>>>>> Point of View >>>>>> >>>>>> Register at the dedicated AccessIndia list for discussing >>>>>> accessibility >>>>>> of >>>>>> mobile phones / Tabs on: >>>>>> http://mail.accessindia.org.in/mailman/listinfo/mobile.accessindia_accessindia.org.in >>>>>> >>>>>> >>>>>> Search for old postings at: >>>>>> http://www.mail-archive.com/[email protected]/ >>>>>> >>>>>> To unsubscribe send a message to >>>>>> [email protected] >>>>>> with the subject unsubscribe. >>>>>> >>>>>> To change your subscription to digest mode or make any other changes, >>>>>> please >>>>>> visit the list home page at >>>>>> http://accessindia.org.in/mailman/listinfo/accessindia_accessindia.org.in >>>>>> >>>>>> >>>>>> Disclaimer: >>>>>> 1. Contents of the mails, factual, or otherwise, reflect the thinking >>>>>> of >>>>>> the >>>>>> person sending the mail and AI in no way relates itself to its >>>>>> veracity; >>>>>> >>>>>> 2. AI cannot be held liable for any commission/omission based on the >>>>>> mails >>>>>> sent through this mailing list.. >>>>>> >>>>> >>>>> >>>>> -- >>>>> Avinash Shahi >>>>> Doctoral student at Centre for Law and Governance JNU >>>>> >>>>> >>>>> Register at the dedicated AccessIndia list for discussing >>>>> accessibility >>>>> of >>>>> mobile phones / Tabs on: >>>>> http://mail.accessindia.org.in/mailman/listinfo/mobile.accessindia_accessindia.org.in >>>>> >>>>> >>>>> Search for old postings at: >>>>> http://www.mail-archive.com/[email protected]/ >>>>> >>>>> To unsubscribe send a message to >>>>> [email protected] >>>>> with the subject unsubscribe. >>>>> >>>>> To change your subscription to digest mode or make any other changes, >>>>> please >>>>> visit the list home page at >>>>> http://accessindia.org.in/mailman/listinfo/accessindia_accessindia.org.in >>>>> >>>>> >>>>> Disclaimer: >>>>> 1. Contents of the mails, factual, or otherwise, reflect the thinking >>>>> of >>>>> the >>>>> person sending the mail and AI in no way relates itself to its >>>>> veracity; >>>>> >>>>> 2. AI cannot be held liable for any commission/omission based on the >>>>> mails >>>>> sent through this mailing list.. >>>>> >>>> >>>> >>>> Register at the dedicated AccessIndia list for discussing accessibility >>>> of >>>> mobile phones / Tabs on: >>>> http://mail.accessindia.org.in/mailman/listinfo/mobile.accessindia_accessindia.org.in >>>> >>>> >>>> Search for old postings at: >>>> http://www.mail-archive.com/[email protected]/ >>>> >>>> To unsubscribe send a message to >>>> [email protected] >>>> with the subject unsubscribe. >>>> >>>> To change your subscription to digest mode or make any other changes, >>>> please >>>> visit the list home page at >>>> http://accessindia.org.in/mailman/listinfo/accessindia_accessindia.org.in >>>> >>>> >>>> Disclaimer: >>>> 1. Contents of the mails, factual, or otherwise, reflect the thinking >>>> of >>>> the >>>> person sending the mail and AI in no way relates itself to its >>>> veracity; >>>> >>>> 2. AI cannot be held liable for any commission/omission based on the >>>> mails >>>> sent through this mailing list.. >>>> >>> >> >> >> Register at the dedicated AccessIndia list for discussing accessibility >> of >> mobile phones / Tabs on: >> http://mail.accessindia.org.in/mailman/listinfo/mobile.accessindia_accessindia.org.in >> >> >> Search for old postings at: >> http://www.mail-archive.com/[email protected]/ >> >> To unsubscribe send a message to >> [email protected] >> with the subject unsubscribe. >> >> To change your subscription to digest mode or make any other changes, >> please >> visit the list home page at >> http://accessindia.org.in/mailman/listinfo/accessindia_accessindia.org.in >> >> >> Disclaimer: >> 1. Contents of the mails, factual, or otherwise, reflect the thinking of >> the >> person sending the mail and AI in no way relates itself to its veracity; >> >> 2. AI cannot be held liable for any commission/omission based on the >> mails >> sent through this mailing list.. >> > > > -- > Ajay Minocha > Mob : +91-9584076767 > E mail : [email protected] > [email protected] > Skype: ajayminocha2 > -- Ajay Minocha Mob : +91-9584076767 E mail : [email protected] [email protected] Skype: ajayminocha2 Register at the dedicated AccessIndia list for discussing accessibility of mobile phones / Tabs on: http://mail.accessindia.org.in/mailman/listinfo/mobile.accessindia_accessindia.org.in Search for old postings at: http://www.mail-archive.com/[email protected]/ To unsubscribe send a message to [email protected] with the subject unsubscribe. To change your subscription to digest mode or make any other changes, please visit the list home page at http://accessindia.org.in/mailman/listinfo/accessindia_accessindia.org.in Disclaimer: 1. Contents of the mails, factual, or otherwise, reflect the thinking of the person sending the mail and AI in no way relates itself to its veracity; 2. AI cannot be held liable for any commission/omission based on the mails sent through this mailing list..
