Lenn,
I’m so impressed by your generosity and compassion for these people and thank
you. Majority of Khmer oversea always support to their family in Cambodia in
one way or other. My family often sent thousands of dollars to support family,
friends or anonym people through personal initiation, organizations or
associations, often to support a project, rarely a personnel needs. But our
efforts seem to be so derisory comparing to the needs of these people as if we
put a pinch of salt in the big river of needs believing it will salt the entire
river. Everything in Cambodia are as much expensive comparing to what they earn
per month to offer these people a dignity living even they have a nice job
except for few spoiled people that sleep over soiled dollars. Majority of
people working so hard from morning to night, sometime at their risk of their
life but still cant have enough to feed their mouth and those of their family.
Everyone have to do anything as they can just to feed their stomach including
doing something which lead to lose their dignity as human. Most of all, you can
do nothing with empty hands. Government did nothing to support project or
living of people beside repression over them as robbing international aides
then redistribution a small part of it in form of derisory welfare objects like
sac of rice, pieces of cloth just to make them look more miserable and to make
propaganda for their regime and party. They have to live in a sort of unfair
atmosphere which leads them to lose all dignity as human. Poverty alone cant
explain these odd things happened among Cambodians but influence and culture of
those who dominate and decide their life. So your adopted daughter as well her
family doesn’t only need your money alone but mostly your helps and
intelligence get over that kind of life to live free and in dignity and to
live free and in dignity they must first earn their liberty and rights. Liberty
of thinking, liberty of access to universal knowledge and liberty of decide of
their destiny which they don’t have actually. And these things can not be
earned without fighting. International community must stop to supply and
support this kind of government, not only in Cambodia as they always did
because this kind of government has no regard to people life and dignity if
not, they will not have less crime in hands than those criminals at all.
Regards
==============
On May 18, 12:53 am, Len Graceffo <[email protected]> wrote:
> Dear TSC,
> Thank you for your feedback. I needed to hear that. I'm so ashamed
of Canada for being a puppet of the U.S. and sitting back while the U.S. bombed
the shit out of Cambodia. We're responsible for the KR's atrocities by
allowing them to stay in power as long as we did. My hope was that maybe not
the parents but the children would recognize the spiritual principle of
generousity and incorporate that into their lives as they grow older. Planting
a small seed might bear fruit down the road. Among people 40 and over trust
seems to be an issue amongst themselves. When I started this 2 years ago I told
the family I would do this until Srey Mach was 18. I've also told Srey Mach
that I will send her to University with room and board if she wants/qualifies.
Just her. I'm aware that if she chooses this I will have to put controls in
place. You're absolutely right about the values of hard work but are there any
jobs in the rual villages besides sporadic farming? Many people seem to be
unemployed. Aside from the bustling markets and the older people who seem to be
busy its the 18-25 year olds who seem to have a lot of time on their hands.
Maybe I am doing more harm than good. I work a minimum of 60 hour weeks in the
oilsands of Alberta, Canada. I know the value of a dollar. Thanx again.
Regards, Lenny G
>
>
> > Date: Sun, 17 May 2009 08:35:00 -0700
> > Subject: Re: My Cambodian foster daughter
> > From: [email protected]
> > To: [email protected]
>
> > Hi Lenny,
>
> > You are caught in the never-ending support to these people. $100.00
a
> > month falling from the sky is very helpful for any family,
regardless
> > of its size. Many people are breaking their back for $50.00 (of some
> > 60 hours/week hard-laboring work) in a factory.
>
> > While I appreciate your good intention, I think you do more harm
than
> > help by not teaching these people the values of hard work. I doubt
> > that you can get this $100.00 from a Canadian tree; you work for it,
> > don’t you?
>
> > Cambodian society now is a society dominated by “beggars” where many
> > people expect special handouts from people like you and others who
are
> > heartbroken from seeing their poverty and injustices in Cambodia.
> > They love you to death when you feed them freely, but at the moment
> > that you stop helping them or putting any conditions on them, it’s
> > almost certain that you will become their foe overnight. If this
will
> > happen, please don’t be disappointed. Just think that it was an
> > unconditional love that you have for them. Such thought may set you
> > free, but that is what they are banking on. 100 years from now,
these
> > people will still begging for free contributions.
>
> > There are so many tricks and lies (I have no ideas where they
learned
> > them from) to break your heart. Some use sickness, diseases and
> > family’s problems to beg; some use social or political injustices to
> > request your assistance; others just create their personal lies. It
> > happens throughout the country and in all institutions. It is a
cancer
> > in Cambodian modern society. Government is looking for handouts;
> > politicians are also looking for handouts and NGOs, too, are looking
> > for handouts; and much of contributions have been abused. When is it
> > going to end?
>
> > One Cambodian lives near me here in New York was notified by his
> > siblings in Cambodia that his mother had died two times on different
> > dates. Before knowing that he was being deceived, the man had
depleted
> > his savings and cash from his credit card.
>
> > Yes, Cambodians need help, but they must work… and prove that they
“do
> > work.” The value of your free assistance is worth as much as free
> > thing; it equal to nothing in the long run.
>
> > Move on, you have done enough.
>
> > ============
> > On May 16, 1:44 am, Len Graceffo <[email protected]> wrote:
> > > Hello Everybody!!! I really need some advice. Please read the
following correspondences with my friend Shelly in Canada. I've been told by
foreigners living in Cambodia that the poor can't go to bed with money in their
pocket as they're programmed to a "day to day" survival mentality. I'm a
Canadian who has been giving $100.00 U.S./month for the last 2 years to a
family of 7 (5 kids). That's about $157.00 CDN with the exchange and western
union fees that they don't seem to understand. The mother can't read I found
out as I was pointing to the months written in Khmer in my translation book and
she didn't understand. But she knows her numbers !!! The attractive,
intelligent 17 year old girl "Mach" lives in Krawlann,Siem Reap behind the
market in a shack off of National Rd #6 at the intersection of the road that
goes north to O'Smach. My recent trip a month ago revealed that food prices are
a lot higher than Thailand's. Why? A skinny whole chicken cost 150 baht !!!
I've been told that university educated people don't earn $100.00/month U.S. I
don't want her ending up in prostitution as she's the eldest daughter. They
keep asking for more money and its making me angry. Can't they just accept
$100.00 U.S and be grateful? This time it's to "make rice" up at the family
farm in Samrong. I told the parents that they can do whatever they want with
the money as long as Mach is in English school for the half day I believe and
the other half in Khmer. I've just told her a few days ago I want her needs
met and to tell her mother that $50.00/month is for Mach and the other 50 is
for the family. I give $100.00U.S./month to cover any lost wages since Mach is
supposed to be studying. I really like her Dad Pin. He's a driver/farmer
apparently and seems to work the Krawlann/Samrong/Anlong Veng triangle. With
all those kids is it possible to save money out of that $100.00U.S. I'm lost. I
feel like cutting them off or reducing it to $50.00/month Please advise, Lenny G
>
> > > From: [email protected]
> > > To: [email protected]
> > > Subject: FW: clip
> > > Date: Fri, 15 May 2009 23:48:34 -0500
>
> > > Date: Thu, 14 May 2009 10:02:14 -0600
> > > Subject: Re: clip
> > > From: [email protected]
> > > To: [email protected]
>
> > > Hi Sweetie,
> > > I am so sorry how things have gone side ways with Mach and her
family. You are quite right when you say how sad for them. However, they will
learn the age old lesson of, you don't know what you've got til its gone! I am
glad you have made peace with your self. Len, you are a very loving and
generous man who just wants to make a difference. Please don't let this change
that wonderful quality that so few people possess. In saying that I know you
will move on and learn from it. Lots of Love Shelley
>
> > > PS. Do You have an idea when you will be home?
>
> > > On Thu, May 14, 2009 at 12:09 AM, Len Graceffo
<[email protected]> wrote:
>
> > > I've really sorted things out in my soul. My Cambo daughter
keeps asking for more money as I hear her ungrateful mother in the background
coach her. To the mothers credit she did offer to send me back the $600.00 I
sent her "sick" son about 6 months ago. She didn't know that her son pressured
Mach into lying to me. I knew the 18 yr old son Gia just wanted a cell phone
and money He used his younger sister to ask me. I don't know if I told you that
or not. I didn't care at the time because they're so poor and I didn't want
Western Union getting any more of my money. I found out this trip that he was
arrested by the police for geting in a fight with the village gangster whom he
owed money and he gave them $ 500.00 and bought a cell phone. I took him aside
that if he ever pulls that again I'm going to Phnom Phen to hire a hitman to
kill him and the village gangster. I am obviously dealing with a child
soldier/labour camp mentality that doesn't have the capacity for gratitude. How
unfortunate for them as I'm cutting them off after June. The way they prey on
the daughter to get them to do their bidding. What else can she do? I feel that
I've made peace with my conscience and will now live life on life's terms and
just concentrate on my own life as I can't help everybody. How sad for them. I
will direct my money to the green gecko orphanage which I visited and seen the
tangible results. Thanx for listening, Lenny
>
> > > Date: Sun, 10 May 2009 21:24:07 -0600
> > > Subject: Fwd: FW: clip
> > > From: [email protected]
> > > To: [email protected]; [email protected]
>
> > > ---------- Forwarded message ----------
>
> > > Really an unbelievable video...thought you should see it. I could
do without the well-worn sound tract, tho'.
> > > No virus found in this incoming message.
> > > Checked by AVG -www.avg.com
> > > Version: 8.0.238 / Virus Database: 270.12.21/2101 - Release Date:
05/07/09 18:05:00
>
> > > Create a cool, new character for your Windows Live™ Messenger.
Check it out
>
> > > Internet Explorer 8 makes surfing easier. Get it now!
> > > _________________________________________________________________
> > > Windows Live helps you keep up with all your friends, in one
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>
> > > - Show quoted text -
>
> _________________________________________________________________
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> - Show quoted text -
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