Am I Hurting My Child With Day Care?
Posted by Jamie Heller

Day-care parents, brace yourself. A new study is out about our
children, and it's not reassuring. According to the study, published
in the March-April issue of the journal Child Development, children
who spend large amounts of time in child-care centers exhibit more
minor behavior problems, such as aggression and disobedience, than
other children, at least through sixth grade. My colleague Sue
Shellenbarger writes about the study here:

http://online.wsj.com/article/SB117486330461648401.html

When studies like this came out in the past, I tended to ignore them,
especially when they grouped different forms of "non-maternal" care
together (see this article:

http://online.wsj.com/article/SB111223054814593805-search.html?KEYWORDS=day+care&COLLECTION=wsjie/6month

). It seemed the only way to avoid the apparent negative results for
non-maternal care was to provide maternal care. Since I was set on
working, for financial and professional reasons, it didn't matter much
to me what experts thought, because I knew child care was the right
solution for my family.

But this study seems different — it suggests that between child-care
centers and nannies, child-care centers are worse. The question, then,
for me and other day-care parents, is whether to switch. For my big
boy, six, the dice are rolled. He's been in child-care/preschools from
the get-go, and now he's in kindergarten. But for the little guy, just
turning three, I could give up the full-time preschool and opt for a
nanny for the next couple of years.

My gut reaction is to say, study, shmudy — it's a great school and
besides, I truly believe we are good parents. The study researchers
themselves say "the quality of parenting children receive is a far
stronger and more consistent predictor of achievement and social
functioning."

But part of me has to acknowledge that the study plays to my worst
fears. More than my big guy, my little guy gives us a run for our
money. He upsets easily. Today, when I asked him for a kiss, he bonked
me on the head. Still, he's not exactly at a mature age; and the
teachers insist he's a delight. I am reluctant to switch to a nanny
for the reasons I outlined in this prior post. And I hate the idea of
letting so-called experts influence decisions on which I think I
should know best.

I wonder, though, whether I'm being wise by staying the course, or stubborn

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