Hi Karen,

The problem with this framework is that you risk guilting parents (usually 
women) for choices they 
are forced to make, or even those they may genuinely want to make, especially 
if the parents' level of 
engagement doesn't match what others expect. Like I said earlier, for some 
people, a mother's 
choosing to work at all is irresponsible. Framing arguments in this way is 
ultimately damaging and 
shifts the burden away from institutions who need to step up and support 
parents, and instead shifts 
that burden to parents for whom choice may be relative and is definitely highly 
value-laden. I don't 
see the value in reminding people who are probably already very aware that that 
can't spend enough 
time with their kids that, in addition for working hard to provide their family 
at the expense of having 
a fulfilling life, they're also not really raising their kids. Those choices 
were probably hard to make. I 
also still fail to see how that is relevant to a discussion of women in 
academia-- the overwhelming 
evidence is that women are leaving academia because there aren't institutions 
in place to support 
them, not that women are abandoning their families.  

Best wishes,


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