--- In [email protected], Duveyoung <no_reply@...> wrote: > > Curtis, > > Hmmmm, you keep pulling the rug out from under my "Curtis' beliefs are" > processes.> > > Attachment as something "good" seems to be debatable; your definition of > "attachment" would necessarily be needed here by me to feel like I have > traction to counter you.
You have countered my idiotic statement quite well without my definition. Now I am forced to actually think. God damn intelligent friends! I agree with most of what you wrote but I do think of it differently. I have given up the perspective of the ego and self peddled by the East. I think they misunderstood some critical pieces which we have the benefit of time to add. Part of it comes from my rejection that the silent part of my mind is my true self. I don't believe it. And I reject the notion that seeing myself as an identity such as musician diminishes me or is attached to ego in a negative way. I see myself as a human doing which is anathema to so many philosophies of living. The roles I play in the world, the skills I acquire are all pieces of the real me,my true self. And for every skill that will diminish as I age, I have two more that are not going to be so quickly squashed such as a love of learning or the delight I take in discovering another person's POV. When they go the shithouse has truly burned down and I don't believe my silent mind is going to be much help. Since meditating so much it made my ass hurt in the movement, and then stopping for 18 years, and then taking it up as a hobbyist in the last few years I have come to my own conclusions about the balance I am seeking of these opposing forces of dissociation and connection to my experience. NLP was useful in helping me find some distinctions of what states are appropriate for what activities. If you get stuck on too much one side or the other it causes trouble. This is the problem of both too much meditation and too much non-reflective experience. Although I am still working out the details of the differences and connections between the states of dissociation caused by meditation and those caused by trauma, I recognized that for me, I have so much affinity for dissociation that if I want to focus on something it is full experiential engagement. One rep of the mantra and I am back in wonderland floating free. But it takes some exercise and commitment to practicing my instruments to get me back into the sensual zone where I am at my best and can enjoy my life the most. That is what I meant by the balance I seek, more engagement, which would have been a more intelligent choice than attachment. But I have to work with the perceptiveness I have so that is what I said. And thanks to you I have been given a chance to re-think this choice. But hear me now and believe me later, when we are drooling in our laps in the rest home, if you are in the wheel chair next to me, I only want to hear stories about those outer skills, preferable including women's breasts. I want to hear about the best tryke experience you ever had and not one word about the best spiritual experience you had. And in return I will manage to get our Dominican nurse to come over to bend over picking something up right in front of us. I am already working on a whole bunch of strategies. Because the most interesting parts of us are not the self beyond our capacities. The infinite unbounded fluff cloud of whatever. It is those very capacities which, due to the circumstances of mortality, inevitably diminish. But if I am lucky, and from my association with my very funny 92 year old dad, sense of humor with be the last to fail us. So yes, I was full of shit about the attachment thing! > > But, meanwhile, let me blurbify. > > I still hold that it's true that attachment (by my definition) is a negative > for personal psychology even if spiritual enlightenment is a bogus myth. > > To me, to be attached seems to be a process where we lock-in on some "thing," > and then we begin to resist any other clearer-eyed view of our original > investment in suchlike. The book The Structure of Scientific Revolutions by > Thomas Kuhn which I'm certain that you must have read, underlines the problem > of attachment when it comes to scientific advance. I hold the same is true > for every and all investments in projections. > > From my own life, I see that I have, thousands upon thousands of times, > unknowingly entered a cul-de-sac that eventually would peter-out, and I'd be > left with but another tee shirt I don't like wearing, but I don't toss out > the tee shirt, see? I have invested soooooo much into high concepts, > personal skill sets, other people, etc. that only ended up as yet another > time waster -- albeit entertaining, educating, emotionally triggering, etc. > "Time waster" means that I reach a point where my interest in something has > faded so much that I have to struggle to argue that I should have ever > bothered beginning the relationship with it. > > I'm not against investment that gets one hooked on deepening one's skill > sets, be they yodeling or fixing heart valves, but if such an attachment is > framed by the ego with "that's me, that's who I am" then this is a falsity > that must later be ripped by the roots out from one's world view when we see > the folly of identifications that no longer serve but to which one is > addicted. > > I USED to be so excellent at chess, piano, pocket billiards, creating > artworks, but I haven't done that stuff for DECADES, and yet I'm over here > still telling folks "I'm a pianist" like that like that. (Okay, yes, I can > still play piano, but only on a plink-plunky basis.) This is where attachment > keeps us within our self-imposed frames that no longer serve -- except that > it pleases an ego. > > To me, any framing of reality is the "original sin," and there went unity. > > Those of us that live a long time are certain to see the skills wane, the > interests wane, the intent to live life "fully" wane. Some of us will arrive > on a final hospital bed and only be able to stay awake a few minutes at a > time, and even lifting a glass of water is impossible without a nurse helping > us with a sippy cup. > > Whence then the use of all these identifications? > > What memories THEN will serve to make being an invalid less burdensome? "I'm > dying any second now, but let me think about how good I could put an eight > ball into a side pocket." -- that won't work, right? > > To me attachment necessarily takes us out of the now and hard wires us into > "what was in the past still is." Ugh on that, cuz when the now is all you > have, you'd best be well practiced at abiding in it. > > Not that you haven't dwelt in the now and got the tee shirt and strike a > commanding figure when you wear it. > > Just sayin! > > Edg > > > > > --- In [email protected], "curtisdeltablues" <curtisdeltablues@> > wrote: > > > > --- In [email protected], Duveyoung <no_reply@> wrote: > > > > > > Curtis, > > > > > > Have you considered that Judy is like Guru Dev when he was looking for a > > > guru? He got that one guru angry, and Guru Dev said something like: > > > "This guy's anger proves he isn't fully enlightened, so he's not the guru > > > I seek." > > > > Edg my brother, don't get me started again on the hideous story of a poor > > boy who left home searching for a "perfect" father sold as a wonderful > > spiritual tale of his greatness. A boy so scarred by life with a family > > that he left his home and faced starvation rather than face another day > > of...what? What adult bastard caused a young boy so much pain that he > > needed to leave his home? And what family life life him so scarred that he > > led a life of homeless camping behind the KFC in the state park? Away from > > people, never to be with people, to hell with people... > > > > Sorry man, I get lost in that dark trance sometimes. The miracle story > > manufactured from obvious neglect and probable abuse. Plus his family was > > rich enough to find the kid. Why didn't they? > > > > OK back again. Let me focus. Judy like Guru Dev...through her dedication > > to hostility busting down people for, what was her last complaint about > > me...trying to be Mr. Wonderbread was it? No it was close though, Mr. > > Wonderful, that's it. She was taking me down for trying to present an > > impression that I am a wonderful human being full of the light of God and > > optimism that I can spread my music to the world or at least an improvement > > on those crappy sugary drinks pawned off as Chaipirinias in Mall bars. I'm > > having a little trouble following you here although the idea that some > > misfortune in the past my be the shared cause for aniti-social tendencies > > might be a rich vein to explore... > > > > > > > > Gotta give that which pokes ya and irks ya a deep bow just for rubbing > > > your nose in a crippling attachment even if the messenger is all puffy > > > egoic about it. > > > > Yes the "petty tyrant" of Castaneda novels fame. I always gave her credit > > for pissing me off enough to write. But I am not a fan of the "attachment > > as bad" thoery. I am not on any path that seeks to lessen attachment, I am > > hungry for more of it. > > > > Anything I learned from interacting with Judy could have been accomplished > > without the rancorous bullshit. That was all unnecessary IMO. But she has > > picked out her sheets, the comforter with the Victorian flower print duvet > > cover and the edge ruffles (which seems unwise in these days of bed bug > > threats) and now she props herself up on no less than 15 pillows each > > depicting a moral lesson from the classic: I Am SO Much More Ethical Than > > You Are, penned by the inventor of the male chastity belt. > > > > > > > > Except of course, unless Judy criticizes me, then I'm like you. > > > > > > Sigh..... > > > > The display of honesty and self-effacing truth that makes me proud to be > > your friend Edg. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Edg > > > > > > --- In [email protected], "curtisdeltablues" > > > <curtisdeltablues@> wrote: > > > > > > > > Busy, busy, Sour Plum. So much rancor to spread but the numbers of > > > > posts are burning so fast. Who else needs correction, who else needs > > > > to be put in their place...and all around her enemies in collusion, yes > > > > enemies who plot to burn up her posts with things that need correction, > > > > so much scolding to dole out, so many personal flaws to expose to the > > > > innocent world which can't be trusted on its own to come to the > > > > righteous conclusions of the Sour Plum. Oh and the need for hostile > > > > challenges just grows on all sides between the enemies plotting > > > > together, in collusion, and no one else can see how bad it all is, they > > > > must be warned but that will burn up more posts... > > > > > > > > (I submit this for approval from my Dark Lord who is training me in the > > > > black arts of the "wisecrack".) > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
