--- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, "claudiouk" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
> The really problematic dimension of suffering is not personal (if one 
> can indeed become "detached" from internal desire or aversion) - it 
> is interpersonal. Try being detatched whilst your loved ones are 
> being tortured... 
It is not about being emotionally detached. It is about embracing all
the awful emotions the situation arises, and by no way trying to
diminish the horror of the situation.
This is much easier to accomplish when the `I ` is firmly established
on a ground where it does not anymore identify with these emotions.
Not identifying does not mean not feeling intensely. It means that you
can keep yourself separate from the emotions. It is a situation where
you have emotions in your system, body and mind. You are not the
emotions, you have them, you witness them and simultaneously observe
and feel them very intensely. 

I went  through this kind of torture experience when my father was
very sick and he was given wrong kind of medication. For a month he
was in a catatonic state, very stiff, not capable of speaking. He
could only scream for help, which he did whenever he had enough energy
for screaming. And he was full of panic and fear and pain, which they
tried to medicate down, but actually made only worse. He deep inside
himself knew this and wanted away from the hospital, but couldn't
express himself. And even if he had been, they wouldn't have let him
go. It was awful to sit in the hospital at his bedside and be with him
in his enormous suffering. Once when I went to the hospital, my
husband said to me:"You look like you were going to a beheading." I
did not understand at that time the medication caused this torture to
my father. After a month they moved him to the University Hospital and
there they immediately realized it was the medication that caused his
suffering. They stopped the medication and after one week he was much
better, and after two weeks again at home. 


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