This really bothers me. For the past week I've had an awful premonition that I 
shouldn't spay her, that she would die during surgery. I had a bad, bad 
feeling. No reason behind it, the thought just kept intruding. I ignored it and 
figured I was just worrying too much. It reminds me of something that happened 
a few years back. I had a day off in the middle of the week, it was springtime, 
& I decided I would go to a nature preserve near my house to look for 
salamanders. Anyway, about a week before I planned to go, I began "seeing" a 
newspaper headline in my head: "Hiker finds body in woods."  The feeling was 
very disturbing and very, very strong. The day of my little trip came, and I 
was so freaked out I didn't go. A few days later I opened up the paper and what 
did I see? "Hiker finds body in woods." At the nature preserve I planned to 
visit. In the very same spot I thought I'd find salamanders. It was a mentally 
ill man who had suffered from an
 apparent heart attack and died. 
This time I didn't trust my gut and look what happened. It is my fault.

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