Laura, you are obviously blessed with strong intuitive thought.  
I am so sorry that you are having these feelings that Bridget's passing is
your fault. I know you will trust your gut in the future. For now, please
try to forgive yourself. When I don't act or do act in opposition to my gut
and something bad happens, all I can do is learn to listen better the next
time. That is ALL I can do at that point. I have so many regrets about not
doing what, in hindsight, I think I should have, but I cannot live there or
it will kill me or make me sick.
Bridget needs your positive energy to get where she is going. I am sending
energy to you.....for some peace in your heart and for self forgiveness.
God bless you. You did what you thought was the right thing.
Laurie

-----Original Message-----
From: felvtalk-boun...@felineleukemia.org
[mailto:felvtalk-boun...@felineleukemia.org] On Behalf Of LauraM
Sent: Wednesday, March 17, 2010 8:17 PM
To: felvtalk@felineleukemia.org
Subject: Re: [Felvtalk] Bridget is dead

This really bothers me. For the past week I've had an awful premonition that
I shouldn't spay her, that she would die during surgery. I had a bad, bad
feeling. No reason behind it, the thought just kept intruding. I ignored it
and figured I was just worrying too much. It reminds me of something that
happened a few years back. I had a day off in the middle of the week, it was
springtime, & I decided I would go to a nature preserve near my house to
look for salamanders. Anyway, about a week before I planned to go, I began
"seeing" a newspaper headline in my head: "Hiker finds body in woods."  The
feeling was very disturbing and very, very strong. The day of my little trip
came, and I was so freaked out I didn't go. A few days later I opened up the
paper and what did I see? "Hiker finds body in woods." At the nature
preserve I planned to visit. In the very same spot I thought I'd
find salamanders. It was a mentally ill man who had suffered from an
 apparent heart attack and died. 
This time I didn't trust my gut and look what happened. It is my fault.

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