On Sun, Jun 09, 2013 at 06:18:51PM +0530, Ramkumar Ramachandra wrote:

> > I have consistently found your demeanor on the list to be very
> > unfriendly and difficult to work with. It is one thing to have honest
> > and straight talk, and another thing to be obstinate, unmindful of
> > feedback (both with respect to technical details, as well as to
> > communication styles), and disrespectful of other people.
> While I agree that being rude and obstinate is definitely undesirable,
> and that a healthy on-list environment is important, I have something
> to add:
> Being super-tactful comes at a cost.

I actually think word choice and politeness is only a small part of it,
and one that I live without.  It is not just _how_ something is said,
but _what_ is said. And sometimes what is said does not lead in a
productive direction. I found Thomas's comment here:


sums up the core of many of the conflicts I've seen on the list.

I am less interested in people's feelings than I am in discussions
trying to reach a productive position of agreement, rather than turning
it into a point by point debate that may no longer have any use for the
project (sometimes individual points need to be refuted or discussed, of
course, but it is easy to lose sight of the purpose of an email).

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