The point I state is simple : When I form an image of a particular pet ( say, a cow ) based on how it appears, it would be an image found on appearance ( a subjective interpretation of it, really.
However, when I form an image ( an understanding, really ) based on what I know of the pet, my image is found on truth ( to the extent I have grasped it ). In respect of ourselves, we are what we are to our own eye, as we are. There is nothing we do not know of ourself, in truth. However, we are ever free to re - form ( edit and add special effects ) what we know of ourself and project it as the self image, to ourself and / or to others. The first would be in truth. The second would be contrived. What others perceive of ourself is not the self image I speak of ... it is what we perceive of ourself. To restate : What we know of ourself determines the regard we have of ourself. It may be highy disconcerting or liberating, or anything in between. And, how we regard ourself determines how we regard others ! ( Not the exclamation mark, Gabby ! Alas, you are satisfied with too little ! ) On Jan 1, 9:31 pm, gruff <[email protected]> wrote: > Lon, Archy, I can confidently vouch for your proposition that we never > fully comprehend ourselves and for everyone else's points about self > image as well. Molly, as usual you have come up with another > pertinent observation about the human condition and started one more > excellent discourse. > > As a living example of the effects self-image can have on one's own > life as well as on the lives of those whom I interact, I am also of an > age where I can be more honest about myself then heretofore permitted, > and I have to say that I'm sorely disappointed with the entire dynamic > of self-image -- not with it's reality but rather with how it has > played itself out in my own particular instance. > > Such dangerous tools should be kept out of the hands of those ill- > equipped to play with them. The complete genesis of self image may be > mostly hidden but I'd be willing to bet a large sum a vast majority of > it has to do with family, particularly ones' parents and siblings. > > Self image may in some ways rely on genetics but I believe the vast > majority of it is instilled in us during our single digit youth which, > like marriage -- for better or worse -- we carry forward into whatever > pathways we travel in life, trailing its detritus behind us. > > Parts of our self image including how we feel about ourselves are > readily apparent in our external behavior, which makes us more > transparent to others than to ourselves until we reach that point of > development where we can begin to look at ourselves more honestly. I > went through most of my life knowing something was terribly wrong but > lacked the ability to figure out what. At least till I began to > indulge in therapy. > > But even now, many years later, there are still deep aspects of my > self image which are hidden from me or which I refuse to see and > acknowledge. Perhaps long term deep psychotherapy might uncover them > but that's an impractical approach for many reasons, not the least of > which is the fact that I've come to distrust most psychological > therapists. It's a profession that seems to lay a deadly trap for > it's pratitioners. I can imagine listening to the deepest and darkest > parts of others day after day after year after year takes its toll, > but on the other hand some of these people are fairly twisted > beforehand which likely led them into the profession of psychology. > > But honestly determining your own self image is at least as daunting > as trying to overcome the psychologically habitual behavior that stems > from those deeply buried images. On a personal level I know some of > the self image I learned as a child -- that I was worthless, no-good, > evil, and would never amount to anything -- and how much that image > played itself out over the course of my life. It was extensive and is > still being played out. > > Yet I also know there are parts of my self image to which I am not > privy. They may be worse or they may be better than those I've > uncovered but the fact they are there disturbs me because it means I > do not have full control over my own psyche and life. I am still > reacting to thoughts, ideas, images and beliefs that were instilled in > me by a dysfunctional family and of which to this day I know little to > nothing. > > This early self image worked to prevent me from developing any > positive feelings about myself. From as young as I can remember > through sixty eight years to today I still reverberate those early > images and add to them in my own prophetically self-fulfilling and > self-perpetuating behavior which is then reinforced further by the > reactions from others appropriate to my own self-image. > > I long to know myself as I truly am but this still eludes me. Perhaps > it is one of those things one learns at the end as one's life flashes > before one's eyes -- unfortunately a bit too late to do anything about > it. Or perhaps not. But one thing is certain -- to me at least -- as > parents each and every one of us have a critical responsibility to > ensure our children have a healthy image of themselves upon which to > build. But as long as we remain dysfunctional within ourselves how > can we teach our children different? --~--~---------~--~----~------------~-------~--~----~ You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google Groups ""Minds Eye"" group. 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