http://www.ralphmag.org/ambivalent.html
On Jan 9, 2:49 am, archytas <[email protected]> wrote: > I came across an old tome whilst preparing to decorate a bedroom. > (Leemings, Joseph (1953) Riddles, Riddles, Riddles, New York: Franklin > Watts, Inc.) > > What does a man love more than life? > Hate more than death or mortal strife? > That which contented men desire, > The poor have, the rich require, > The miser spends, the spendthrift saves, > And all men carry to their graves? > (Leemings, 1953, 201) > > The answer, Nothing, can only be seen through a kaleidoscope of > equivocations. > > There was a time when I thought anger and the kind of message the poem > can give were to be avoided because they would lead to bamboozlement - > now I think feelings and riddles can help us avoid the worst of cold > rhetoric and what that hides. Of course, anger (and other emotions) > in the hands of violent idiots and so on, or the spin doctor, are not > the answer. Slip is, of course, right and wrong at the same time > about the fruitlessness of anger - other posts show he is well aware > of this. There is always the return of desire and no doubt this would > be less important if we were really more tolerant. > > On 8 Jan, 16:46, Slip Disc <[email protected]> wrote: > > > > > I find that much anger is a first reaction to a negative action, > > whether self induced or externally sourced. We can make a wrong > > decision that results in a negative outcome which displeases us to the > > point of anger or someone else can do something to bring about the > > anger. Either way there is a point where the anger can be identified > > and controlled before it actually takes place. It is at this point > > that we can cancel the outward expression of the anger and accept the > > cause, while at the same time making mental note of it. This is when > > others notice and may state, "I thought you would blow your top about > > it, what happened". The anger was pre-diagnosed and canceled. > > It is very rare that someone will act out in anger when the anger has > > been pre-diagnosed, ie; "If he does that I'm going to get really > > mad". In this case the recipient of the negative action has > > identified, classified, and is dealing with the anger before it > > actually takes place. When the action actually takes place the > > recipient confirms it but no longer has to act out the anger because > > it was already subconsciously acted on and there is no longer need to > > react to it. This of course is confined to future anticipatory angers > > which are the easiest to deal with. > > Anger that involves past history is not easily disposed of because it > > was remains unresolved in the subconscious. These subconscious past > > history angers need to be processed. My personally means of process as > > I stated above involves the use of a camera film which becomes > > analogous with the life experience. I look at the batch of photos, > > put them in the shoe box and put it away on a shelf in the garage. > > Gone are the memories, gone are the angers. A first reaction may be > > anger but later it can be humorous. We must realize the fruitlessness > > of anger and it's detrimental consequence. > > Another method I use is the verbal repetition of the negative action. > > ie; Friend tells you "Bob took the keys to your car a smash it into a > > pole", at which time you sit down and repeat several times " Bob took > > the keys to my car and smashed it into a pole". Repeating this > > several times delays the reaction time and allows one to create a > > visual picture of the incident which then becomes part of the > > "processing". There is nothing you can do to change the picture, > > ranting, raving and chopping off your finger won't help, so that > > leaves continuing the process and letting the action complete it's > > cycle. Bob get's arrested, your car get's towed off, and the > > insurance company picks up the tab. Eliminating the anger makes for a > > better experience. It is not as easy as it sounds and requires > > practice with many levels and degrees of anger, however, starting off > > small can make a difference. Next time you burn something in the oven > > try laughing about it instead of blowing your top. > > > On Jan 8, 3:33 am, archytas <[email protected]> wrote: > > > > I'm a bit inclined to think we should be angry with the way of the > > > world. This is a complex matter though, as one of the tricks of > > > establishments is about making us angry so that we make fools of > > > ourselves or at least can be made so in their traps. The time to do > > > what Molly points out directly above is often denied us. > > > > On 7 Jan, 18:13, Molly Brogan <[email protected]> > > > wrote: > > > > > Anger is hard to nail down because it is really a secondary emotion, > > > > often attached to insecurity, defensiveness, defiance, etc. It can be > > > > addictive too, as rage-aholics are all too common. Addictive, because > > > > it can be (paradoxically) a more comfortable and predictable emotion > > > > than say joy, that might require intimacy and sharing in relationship, > > > > behaviors that can be scary to someone feeling insecure or defiant. > > > > Anger creates distance between us and the world, and often moves from > > > > being a natural signal for us to examine a situation, to the reaction > > > > of choice because, after all, it is always effective in creating that > > > > distance. If we fancy ourselves a victim of villain (or even hero) > > > > anger is a useful weapon to create this drama. > > > > > Each of us is charged with examining our emotional make us and > > > > choosing our responses to the world. An important part of self image > > > > to be sure, and only we can do it. > > > > > On Jan 6, 8:57 pm, Slip Disc <[email protected]> wrote: > > > > > > Anger takes on many shades, gruff, and degrees of intensity as well. > > > > > In that respect I try to identify the anger, classify the anger and > > > > > then have a better chance of resolving it. Angers involving the past > > > > > are the easiest for me to deal with because I view life as being a > > > > > roll of film with every moment of life being a new frame. It is easily > > > > > perceived that I don't want to take pictures of the same subject > > > > > matter as that would simply be wasting film. Therefore the past > > > > > experience which used up a large portion of the film is no longer > > > > > viable as a new experience and should be archived. What others did in > > > > > the past that negatively affected my life no longer pertains to my > > > > > life since I had become that individual person that creates the > > > > > future. To think that if (A) didn't happen then I wouldn't be living > > > > > (B) is wasteful energy because no one really knows what is going to > > > > > happen in life. For some people when (A) did happen it ultimately > > > > > cost them their lives. Perhaps we, through certain events in life, > > > > > are saved from undergoing something worse than the present condition > > > > > that we perceive undesirable as a result of (A). Through this > > > > > reasoning I am able to simply dismiss the experience as just that, an > > > > > experience, one which I cannot change but can look at as having some > > > > > value. It is like the 1990 movie, Mr. Destiny, check it out if you > > > > > can. > > > > > Anger of course is a subject that requires more examination and I > > > > > don't mean to trivialize it in any way. I just want to at least > > > > > scratch the surface of how I view anger and how I deal with it, which > > > > > in a sense coincides with how I deal with many other things, through > > > > > logical reasoning. Anger serves no purpose in my life and > > > > > accomplishes nothing, so naturally I want to do away with it. > > > > > > On Jan 6, 10:34 am, gruff <[email protected]> wrote: > > > > > > > "... On Jan 2, 9:04 am, Molly > > > > > > Brogan<[email protected]> wrote: ..." > > > > > > > and Slip Disc too ... > > > > > > > > Why worry about what others think, do, say? Why feel the need to > > > > > > > conform to trends, ideologies, etc.? If I think instead about my > > > > > > > relationship to them, (how do they serve my day to day life, when > > > > > > > I am > > > > > > > in service to them am I feeling my highest potential, in what > > > > > > > ways do > > > > > > > I benefit and contribute, what do they show me about myself, can I > > > > > > > feel the love?) I can let go of what is limited and unchangeable. > > > > > > > I > > > > > > > think most of all, Gruff, about you, and how the world has let you > > > > > > > down. Your relationship to all that is so much more important > > > > > > > than > > > > > > > anything that was said and done. You are MORE than any of > > > > > > > that...and > > > > > > > there can be a relationship that includes forgiveness, compassion > > > > > > > and > > > > > > > self determination. I truly believe that the state of mind we > > > > > > > are in > > > > > > > when we leave this world is what carries us into what is next. > > > > > > > If we > > > > > > > can find our way to self love, peace and harmony in our final > > > > > > > moment ... we may just find that the rest of what the world > > > > > > > offered us > > > > > > > in this life falls away from our next experience. > > > > > > > Thank you Molly, but the world has not let me down. If anything > > > > > > I've > > > > > > let myself down. Actually I was really quite blase about my lot in > > > > > > life until I was in my mid-forties. I had just accepted what was > > > > > > and > > > > > > enjoyed life as much as possible. Basically I had gone through > > > > > > those > > > > > > first forty someodd years avoiding responsibility like it was the > > > > > > plague. It was how I dealt with life. When things got tough, I > > > > > > packed up and left for new places. I had no idea who or what I was > > > > > > or where I was going. Nor did it matter. I guess it was a case of > > > > > > coming from nothing so I had nothing to go to. The only thing that > > > > > > puzzled me was that I had learned over time that I was pretty > > > > > > intelligent. I couldn't figure out where it > > ... > > read more »- Hide quoted text - > > - Show quoted text - --~--~---------~--~----~------------~-------~--~----~ You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google Groups ""Minds Eye"" group. To post to this group, send email to [email protected] To unsubscribe from this group, send email to [email protected] For more options, visit this group at http://groups.google.com/group/Minds-Eye?hl=en -~----------~----~----~----~------~----~------~--~---
