Reading your conversation made me think that a very good OS theme would be about how new relationships start, for friends and other types because so many people are using a lot of time looking for some "goal" or "tarjet" in this sites where you ara suposed to find your "soulmate" ...a lot of time is wasted socialy i Think! And there is a need for a space to meet that's for shure. But it would be so nice to have an OS where we could reflect together about this kind of issues about control, surprise, willing to provoque a specific reaction on the other person. But it is not clear in my mind how the question could be framed but I feel there is a need for a space where people having this issues could talk and reflect about this topics. And see also that they are not alone in this. Adriana
2013/10/26 Daniel Mezick <d...@newtechusa.net> > A wonderful conversation in the works...my replies appear below... > > On 10/24/13 1:29 PM, Jenifer Toksvig wrote: > > Dan wrote: >> Consider the man who loves a certain woman, and waits for > the current trend of her interest in him to change. He is goal seeking > without controlling. Likewise, trend-following market traders do not > attempt to create, control or make trends. They simply identify & ride > them, while seeking wealth. << > > Waiting and seeking are still forms of controlling. > > Yes, they are forms of governing one self. Actually, this is a very narrow > and focused form of control: control of one's self. We often refer to this > as 'discipline', which is distinct from the more general word 'control'. > Self-discipline vs. attempted control of others, if you will. > > Your loving man has chosen to wait for his goal rather than (to coin a > phrase) being prepared to be surprised by another woman. > > The man in the hypothetical situation has a current goal, which is to be > in relationship with a certain woman. He watches and follows the trend of > her interest. This does not mean he is blind to what the wider environment > might be offering now. > > He may not be trying to control her, but he’s still trying to control the > situation in a way that he thinks will allow him to achieve his goal. > > It sounds like 'the situation' you mention above is: "him or her self." > That's discipline of self, not control of others. > > > Those who seek wealth do likewise: they don’t randomly ride the trends, > they identify them and make choices about how to ride them, in order to > obtain wealth. That is control. > > Um, if you mean control of one's responses, if you mean self-goverance, > self-discipline then yes. Controlling one self is generally a good idea, is > it not? > > > I don’t think it’s possible to be goal-oriented and try to exert some kind > of control over the process, unless your goal is… to have no goal. > > I think you mean > "...I don’t think it’s possible to be goal-oriented and NOT try to exert > some kind of control over the process.." > > If that's the case, I agree 100% goal-oriented requires self-control, aka > "discipline". Trend-trading markets traders without discipline routinely > lose money. Individuals without self-control routinely create problems for > themselves. > > Actually, even being prepared to be surprised is a goal. A sort of > wonderfully ridiculous one. > > Yes, and the statement itself is: directive. Wait, whats that doing in OST? > > > Jen x > > *Jenifer Toksvig > *www.acompletelossforwords.com > > *The Copenhagen Interpretation > *www.thecopenhageninterpretation.co.uk > > > > _______________________________________________ > OSList mailing list > To post send emails to OSList@lists.openspacetech.org > To unsubscribe send an email to oslist-le...@lists.openspacetech.org > To subscribe or manage your subscription click > below:http://lists.openspacetech.org/listinfo.cgi/oslist-openspacetech.org > > > -- > > Daniel Mezick, President > > New Technology Solutions Inc. > > (203) 915 7248 (cell) > > Bio <http://newtechusa.net/dan-mezick/>. Blog<http://newtechusa.net/blog/>. > Twitter <http://twitter.com/#%21/danmezick/>. > > Examine my new book: The Culture Game > <http://newtechusa.net/about/the-culture-game-book/>: Tools for the Agile > Manager. > > Explore Agile Team > Training<http://newtechusa.net/services/agile-scrum-training/>and > Coaching. <http://newtechusa.net/services/agile-scrum-coaching/> > > Explore the Agile Boston <http://newtechusa.net//user-groups/ma/> > Community. > > _______________________________________________ > OSList mailing list > To post send emails to OSList@lists.openspacetech.org > To unsubscribe send an email to oslist-le...@lists.openspacetech.org > To subscribe or manage your subscription click below: > http://lists.openspacetech.org/listinfo.cgi/oslist-openspacetech.org > > -- Adriana Díaz-Berrio Ph.D. CRHA (514) 739 2268 www.diazberrio.com
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