Reading your conversation made me think that a very good OS theme would
be about how new relationships start, for friends and other types
because so many people are using a lot of time looking for some "goal"
or "tarjet" in this sites where you ara suposed to find your "soulmate"
...a lot of time is wasted socialy i Think!
And there is a need for a space to meet that's for shure.
But it would be so nice to have an OS where we could reflect together
about this kind of issues about control, surprise, willing to provoque a
specific reaction on the other person.
But it is not clear in my mind how the question could be framed but I
feel there is a need for a space where people having this issues could
talk and reflect about this topics. And see also that they are not alone
in this.
Adriana
2013/10/26 Daniel Mezick <d...@newtechusa.net <mailto:d...@newtechusa.net>>
A wonderful conversation in the works...my replies appear below...
On 10/24/13 1:29 PM, Jenifer Toksvig wrote:
Dan wrote: >> Consider the man who loves a certain woman, and
waits for the current trend of her interest in him to change. He
is goal seeking without controlling. Likewise, trend-following
market traders do not attempt to create, control or make trends.
They simply identify & ride them, while seeking wealth. <<
Waiting and seeking are still forms of controlling.
Yes, they are forms of governing one self. Actually, this is a very
narrow and focused form of control: control of one's self. We often
refer to this as 'discipline', which is distinct from the more
general word 'control'. Self-discipline vs. attempted control of
others, if you will.
Your loving man has chosen to wait for his goal rather than (to
coin a phrase) being prepared to be surprised by another woman.
The man in the hypothetical situation has a current goal, which is
to be in relationship with a certain woman. He watches and follows
the trend of her interest. This does not mean he is blind to what
the wider environment might be offering now.
He may not be trying to control her, but he’s still trying to
control the situation in a way that he thinks will allow him to
achieve his goal.
It sounds like 'the situation' you mention above is: "him or her
self." That's discipline of self, not control of others.
Those who seek wealth do likewise: they don’t randomly ride the
trends, they identify them and make choices about how to ride
them, in order to obtain wealth. That is control.
Um, if you mean control of one's responses, if you mean
self-goverance, self-discipline then yes. Controlling one self is
generally a good idea, is it not?
I don’t think it’s possible to be goal-oriented and try to exert
some kind of control over the process, unless your goal is… to
have no goal.
I think you mean
"...I don’t think it’s possible to be goal-oriented and NOT try to
exert some kind of control over the process.."
If that's the case, I agree 100% goal-oriented requires
self-control, aka "discipline". Trend-trading markets traders
without discipline routinely lose money. Individuals without
self-control routinely create problems for themselves.
Actually, even being prepared to be surprised is a goal. A sort of
wonderfully ridiculous one.
Yes, and the statement itself is: directive. Wait, whats that doing
in OST?
Jen x
*Jenifer Toksvig
*www.acompletelossforwords.com <http://www.acompletelossforwords.com>
*The Copenhagen Interpretation
*www.thecopenhageninterpretation.co.uk
<http://www.thecopenhageninterpretation.co.uk>
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