Patrick went through the house. He knew Kat had gone on a kind of tour but
he was getting concerned about Rachel. He hadn't seen her for hours and she
hadn't been down to check on Kat...
He looked this way and that and decided to head toward a room he had
remembered had been a kind of adjoining office to her room.
He spoke her name out of habit, even though she couldn't hear him and then
frowned a little.
He opened the door and found her perusing papers, files, and figured they
had to do with her profession, but the emotion and expression that held her
features now.....
"What's going on..?" he whispered, going to stand behind her. Sometimes
he'd noticed, she had been able to sense his presence. Maybe she would now
and tell him why she looked so worried....
Rachel
It was useless, just useless! I threw the file across the room in
frustration, the papers flying to the four winds. I had no idea what I was
looking for, not even sure if what I needed was in these files and I hated
this feeling of vulnerability. I needed a drink. I fought back the desire,
it had been years since I'd quit and this wasn't the time to start thinking
that way...just one wouldn't hurt...dammit! Yes it would...because it
wouldn't just be one would it? I stood up, I had to move, pacing the room
like a caged tiger, always on the edge of panic, so close to the edge I
could look over and feel the danger approaching. I needed to get out...out
of my room, out of my mind...out of my life...I needed to escape...just one
drink...just one...I lashed out at the vase of flowers beside my bed sending
it crashing to the floor and smashing, spilling water over the rug. For a
moment I stood in fascinated horror...look what I did! But it felt good,
gave the feeling some form, noise, destruction. Thoughts went round and
round in my mind, spinning helplessly out of control...I needed
quiet...peace...I remembered still how to feel that. I swallowed, don't go
there Rachel, don't think that...you've come too far now to turn back...but
for peace?
