Lori Ann,
What Stacy said is right on the money. Give the pro's a chance. 13 months is pretty much at the suicide and self pity stage. You are reacting normally. You need someone to help you to the next stage. Suicide is just going to hurt the people that care most about you and rob you of some cool experiences. I think a shrink might be able to help you in pain management too.
Most of us are dealing with some pain to some degree. (yeah, sometimes it is bad and can get discouraging) The mind can't concentrate on two things at one time. If you find something that you can enjoy concentrating on, you can actually be pain free for awhile. The more you do it, the better you get at it. I have to use mental tricks to remmber a lot of stuff. I digress.
This is kind of like a new life, Lori Ann. Before you do anything drastic, try out your new wheels. See what you can learn. Don't feel bad about feeling bad. You can beat it. Explore your mind. Theres some great tools and toys there. Your senses are trying to adjust to your new life. Please give it a try. Call a shrink and find one you like. The drugs are nothing compared to what you can do with your mind. Trust me!
john
30 years post, C-5 complete
In a message dated 5/14/2006 4:23:21 AM Eastern Daylight Time, [EMAIL PROTECTED] writes:
HI Lori Ann,
I'm sorry you are in so much pain. Mine was a lot worse earlier on but I think it was mostly muscle break down because it was mostly in my legs and it was soreness. I did get a lot more burning in my buttox but that seemed to subside a lot. Oh, it's been 5 years for me. I still deal with a lot of pain. I was taking 1200mg of neurontin 3 times a day and 20mg of methadone 4 times a day. I was switched to lyrica a few months ago and it works so much better and I even quit the methadone. I also take hydrocodone but considering your addiction to pain meds, I wouldn't recommend it because it could be addictive.
I'm sorry you are suffering so much to the point you want to commit suicide but please get help. I just lost my brother to suicide and it would be an easy out for you but kill your family. I went through a major depression for a couple of months and just coming out of it. I just couldn't understand why he would do such a thing. It's so hard to lose someone and the guilt your family and friends would feel because they would wonder what they could have done. I sought help from a psychatrist 15 months into my injury because I was having a hard time adjusting. Please seek help if you are really that serious about it.
We all are here for you to 'listen' if you want to get it out. Please take care of yourself. I know the pain is unbearable. Have you seen a pain specialist? I have one and maybe you can ask your doctor to refer you to one.
Stacy
----- Original Message -----
Sent: Saturday, May 13, 2006 7:53 PM
Subject: [QUAD-L] Lori Ann - I'm New
Hi,
My name is lori ann and I'm a C-6 complete, just over 13 months post. My
biggist problem is PAIN,PAIN,PAIN!
It is so severe it colors every aspect of my life and I know it has held me
back from recovering some independence in my life.
I was in a car accident on my way to the meth clinic, where I was trying to
beat an addiction to prescription pain meds, that was completely out of
control.
I was being treated for chronic pain.boy if I'd have only known
what was in store for me!!!! Now we can't find a pain med that comes close
to even touching the pain. It's so ironic too, 'cause the pain keeps getting
worse and worse. Everyday I'm astonished at the intensity. You just can't
prepare yourself against it. I'm very depressed, I wish I wouldn't wake up,
I'm ready to die..
Being a quad though, I'd have to have someone assisst me with suicide. I'm
almost ready to ask my fiancee' of 12 1/2 years if he would do it. I don't
think he would, though. Even if I begged.
I have all kinds, the hellfire burning, which for some reason is getting A
LOTworse., I Also have shoulder and hip and knee pain.but the biggest worse
pain I have is in my buttocks. It is SO severe that I can't stay in my
chair for more than 4 hours at a time. Even in bed I have to be rolled onto
my side, and then my shoulders and hips ache. And that's in an air
mattrress. I try to work through the pain, it just wears me down,
Here's what meds I take for pain:
3900 mgs neurontin split in 4 doses
120 mgs methadone a day
70mgs of baclofin a day (for spasms, which I never had, dr.tells me it
helps w/pain) does it?
1mg klonopin 3 x day
75 mgs trazodone at bedtime ( to help me sleep though the pain) hah!
Well, I've whined enough, just wanted to get it out, thanks for listening
and any suggestions greatly appreciated,
Hi, again everyone,
Lori ann
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