True, some subjects can be depressing at times, but the thing is we should never give up hope or love of life and know there are reasons for all things.....The news shows a lot of bad in the world but there is as much good and, good people as there is bad. I feel down at times but overall I am grateful to have been blessed with this strange but awesome experience in LIFE. Have a blessed restful night all, Dan H***
________________________________ From: "[email protected]" <[email protected]> To: [email protected] Sent: Saturday, October 5, 2013 7:28 PM Subject: Fwd: [QUAD-L] Spouse as Caregiver? What if you don't have the money for a caregiver? What if you simply can't find someone willing to do the "disgusting stuff?" There just is no easy answer. This whole thread is depressing as hell. Probably because it faces the truth of our situation. Sorry guys. Got a cloud over my head tonite. Sent from my iPad Begin forwarded message: Resent-From: [email protected] >From: [email protected] >Date: October 5, 2013 at 1:48:17 PM EDT >To: [email protected], [email protected] >Subject: Re: [QUAD-L] Spouse as Caregiver? > > >-----Original Message----- >From: diannal767 <[email protected]> >To: wheelchair <[email protected]> >Sent: Sat, Oct 5, 2013 1:30 pm >Subject: Re: [QUAD-L] Spouse as Caregiver? > > >If I had it all over to do again, I wouldn't have my spouse be my caregiver. >At the time though we had a business which wiped us out of a lot of resources >for us, We were led to believe if we wanted care, we'd have to pay for it. All >went well for about 10 yrs than Dave got caregiver burnout, we divorced plus >he wanted more than a quad woman could give. He tried the dating scene (yes, >it was hard on me). Now he's an Independent Care Provider. Yes, mine. It's >hard to explain to people we are not a couple. My granddaughter thinks he is. >He has been an excellent care provider, 23 yrs of quadhood, now cancer. But, >NO, I don't suggest it. In Dec., we would've been together 40 yrs. >Dianna >I'm sure this topic has been discussed before, but: >> >> >>Those of you who are married or in a serious relationship: do you choose to >>have your husband/wife as your primary caregiver or have an outside caregiver? >> >> >>I've heard and read that it is best not to have your spouse as your primary >>caregiver because it changes the dynamic of the relationship (assuming you >>were together before your injury), but I'm not sure if that's true. >> >> >>Your thoughts and experiences in this matter will be very helpful. >> >> >>Thank you, >>Don. >-----Original Message----- >From: wheelchair <[email protected]> >To: quad-list <[email protected]> >Sent: Fri, Oct 4, 2013 6:05 pm >Subject: Re: [QUAD-L] Spouse as Caregiver? > > >Thank You Don. You are most correct in the change of relationship dynamics. Granted, there are exception to each and every rule, but I know of no study that disputes those findings. Love can be blind for only so long. Where there is a way... you will also find a will. > >Best Wishes > >In a message dated 10/4/2013 3:53:21 P.M. Central Daylight Time, >[email protected] writes: >I'm sure this topic has been discussed before, but: >> >> >>Those of you who are married or in a serious relationship: do you choose to >>have your husband/wife as your primary caregiver or have an outside caregiver? >> >> >>I've heard and read that it is best not to have your spouse as your primary >>caregiver because it changes the dynamic of the relationship (assuming you >>were together before your injury), but I'm not sure if that's true. >> >> >>Your thoughts and experiences in this matter will be very helpful. >> >> >>Thank you, >>Don.
