Hi Rahul, I've read all your mails. I feel another problem with your sighted guide is that he might be affecting the privacy of your friends group. Your friends may have him at the back of their minds while planning their trip with you.
coming to my experience, I am also a late blind with little vision still left. Though I was not good at academics, I was a very mischievous child which made me very popular in the school, with my vision condition adding to my uniqueness. My friends always took me everywhere they went, films, hotels, late night parties, etc. I don't have mobility. So, they always gave me a call to check whether I needed any assistance. I even went to an expedition into a forest with my friends a few years ago. I still remember one of my friends stand in a pool and place his hand adjacent to a rock to enable me to cross the pool by stepping on his palm for support. I know we can't generalise things. But try to make them feel that your presence will make their time more joyous. I'm blessed with such nature and hence always had great company throughout my life so far. On 11/28/11, Anirban Mukherjee <[email protected]> wrote: > Dear Rahul, > > thank you for raising a brilliant discussion. your concerns brought > back a few sweet and sour memories. let me share those. hope you will > not be boared. > > the first day i went to college after having been educated in set ups > where i always had at least a few fellow visually impaired students > was an eye opener. i thought just due to my visual impairment, people > would come and talk to me. but at the end of the class, nobody did and > i was left totally alone in the college hall. i somehow staggered to > the office gate where i had a few acquaintence. a classmate of mine > came and talked with me. but the very next day when i started > interacting with my friends, they readily obliged and later, i had a > cracking college life. i took part in all sorts of > activities--cultural, political etc. i had and still have some very > good friends and ahem some bitter enemies. (smiles) > > later, when i got the job as a teacher, my school authorities thought > me as their liability. but i have proved my worth somewhat. > > what is most important is that you have to present yourself in such a > way that people feel like mixing with you. > > sorry for a longish and cumbersome mail and thanks for raising this topic. > > with greetings and regards, Anirban Mukherjee, cell: 09433305139 > > be my friend everyone > > On 11/28/11, Rahul Bajaj <[email protected]> wrote: >> Hi all, >> >> First of all, I would like to thank you all for your wonderful and >> informative responses. >> I would love to be friends with everyone in this group :) >> >> Even I happen to be very good in studies, so there are many people who >> contact me when they have doubts/difficulties related to studies. >> My problem is not that I don't have friends. >> In fact, whenever I go for a class, I mostly have someone to talk to, >> and I usually have a lot of fun with my friends. >> The only problem is that my friends don't call me when they go to >> other public places. >> >> Ajay, >> >> I really appreciate your views, and I somewhat agree with you. >> However, I have always believed that I will make myself more dependent >> on others if I don't have a sighted guide with me. >> I believe that my friends think that, If I go somewhere only with my >> friends, and if something goes wrong, then they will be the ones who >> will be answerable. >> However, if I have a sighted guide with me, then they won't have to >> make any extra adjustments for me. >> >> Most of these plans are made after the class gets over. >> So, it could also be that I usually don't end up being a part of these >> plans merely because I mostly have to leave immediately after the >> class gets over, because I have to go with a sighted guide and a >> driver. >> >> >> >> >> On 28/11/2011, Ajay Minocha <[email protected]> wrote: >>> Hi shadab >>> in 4th standard I also had the same situation >>> I was really naughty so my teacher arainged special seet for me just >>> closed to her away from class >>> till 12th standard teachers would want me to sit on the 1st banch >>> because they know as soon as the teacher stoppes then ajay starts >>> and I was too naughty I didn't miss even a single chance to moov away >>> from my seet while in lunch or between other interwells >>> and my friends also supported me >>> they injoyed my company >>> when we used to sit in class and have a chat >>> then it was their duty to let me know when teacher is watching by >>> touching me or some thing else >>> and I used to become silent at once >>> but in my whole school life >>> I didn't let my self to loose the top 5 positions of my class in studies >>> when my parents used to go in parents teacher meeting then teacher would >>> say >>> " this boy is excilent in studies >>> but he is equally naughty" >>> regards >>> >>> >>> On 11/28/11, payal <[email protected]> wrote: >>>> Rahul, >>>> >>>> You've already received some excellent tips from others on this list. >>>> The >>>> main thing I can surmise from these and my own experience with other >>>> sighted >>>> people is that you need to be comfortable in your own skin to ensure >>>> others >>>> see you exactly the same way, confident and ready to take the world on. >>>> >>>> At 17, all your friends have plenty on their own to prove to the world >>>> and >>>> thus will have little time to spare you if you don't make your presence >>>> felt. As Ajay has rightly mentioned, your sighted guide is perhaps a >>>> deterent. They need to feel like you want to be one of them and let >>>> them >>>> do >>>> all your guide perhaps does for you. You are not invisible, they need to >>>> see >>>> that. I still have trouble with people wanting to speak to my companion >>>> rather than me, simply because they know no better and I'm forced to >>>> remind >>>> them I'm only blind and can use all other faculties just fine and don't >>>> bite >>>> either. >>>> >>>> Give yourself the time and space to know that you indeed are a part of >>>> who >>>> all of them are and slowly, but surely things will get better. There are >>>> bigger things in life that will take precedence over this huge worry in >>>> some >>>> time. >>>> >>>> All the best. >>>> >>>> Payal >>>> >>>> -----Original Message----- >>>> From: [email protected] >>>> [mailto:[email protected]] On Behalf Of Rahul Bajaj >>>> Sent: Sunday, November 27, 2011 11:23 PM >>>> To: [email protected] >>>> Subject: [AI] Socialising >>>> >>>> Hi all, >>>> >>>> I hope you all are well. >>>> Like I've mentioned in my earlier posts, I'm 17 and am currently in 12th >>>> grade. >>>> I have quite a few sighted friends, but I've noticed that they hardly >>>> ever call me when they go for movies, have birthday parties or have >>>> get-togethers. >>>> I feel that my visual impairment is a major reason for this. >>>> We have appointed a sighted guide who goes with me everywhere. >>>> >>>> So, I often get depressed and frustrated when my friends don't call me. >>>> In fact, for me, this is the biggest challenge that I currently have >>>> to face due to my visual impairment. >>>> I can't even ask my friends if they don't call me because of my visual >>>> problem, because none of them will ever admit it. >>>> >>>> So, has anyone here faced this problem? >>>> Please share your views and suggestions. >>>> >>>> Cheers, >>>> Rahul >>>> >>>> >>>> Search for old postings at: >>>> http://www.mail-archive.com/[email protected]/ >>>> >>>> To unsubscribe send a message to >>>> [email protected] >>>> with the subject unsubscribe. >>>> >>>> To change your subscription to digest mode or make any other changes, >>>> please >>>> visit the list home page at >>>> http://accessindia.org.in/mailman/listinfo/accessindia_accessindia.org.in >>>> >>>> >>>> >>>> Search for old postings at: >>>> http://www.mail-archive.com/[email protected]/ >>>> >>>> To unsubscribe send a message to >>>> [email protected] >>>> with the subject unsubscribe. >>>> >>>> To change your subscription to digest mode or make any other changes, >>>> please >>>> visit the list home page at >>>> http://accessindia.org.in/mailman/listinfo/accessindia_accessindia.org.in >>>> >>>> >>> >>> >>> -- >>> Ajay Minocha >>> Mob : +91-7827188455 >>> E mail : [email protected] >>> [email protected] >>> >>> >>> Search for old postings at: >>> http://www.mail-archive.com/[email protected]/ >>> >>> To unsubscribe send a message to >>> [email protected] >>> with the subject unsubscribe. >>> >>> To change your subscription to digest mode or make any other changes, >>> please >>> visit the list home page at >>> http://accessindia.org.in/mailman/listinfo/accessindia_accessindia.org.in >>> >>> >> >> >> Search for old postings at: >> http://www.mail-archive.com/[email protected]/ >> >> To unsubscribe send a message to >> [email protected] >> with the subject unsubscribe. >> >> To change your subscription to digest mode or make any other changes, >> please >> visit the list home page at >> http://accessindia.org.in/mailman/listinfo/accessindia_accessindia.org.in >> >> > > > Search for old postings at: > http://www.mail-archive.com/[email protected]/ > > To unsubscribe send a message to > [email protected] > with the subject unsubscribe. > > To change your subscription to digest mode or make any other changes, please > visit the list home page at > http://accessindia.org.in/mailman/listinfo/accessindia_accessindia.org.in > > -- G. Vamshi PH Res : +91 877-2243861 Mobile: +91 9949349497 E-mail ID: [email protected] Skype: gvamshi81 www.retinaindia.org >From darkness unto light Search for old postings at: http://www.mail-archive.com/[email protected]/ To unsubscribe send a message to [email protected] with the subject unsubscribe. To change your subscription to digest mode or make any other changes, please visit the list home page at http://accessindia.org.in/mailman/listinfo/accessindia_accessindia.org.in
