Dear Rahul, thank you for raising a brilliant discussion. your concerns brought back a few sweet and sour memories. let me share those. hope you will not be boared.
the first day i went to college after having been educated in set ups where i always had at least a few fellow visually impaired students was an eye opener. i thought just due to my visual impairment, people would come and talk to me. but at the end of the class, nobody did and i was left totally alone in the college hall. i somehow staggered to the office gate where i had a few acquaintence. a classmate of mine came and talked with me. but the very next day when i started interacting with my friends, they readily obliged and later, i had a cracking college life. i took part in all sorts of activities--cultural, political etc. i had and still have some very good friends and ahem some bitter enemies. (smiles) later, when i got the job as a teacher, my school authorities thought me as their liability. but i have proved my worth somewhat. what is most important is that you have to present yourself in such a way that people feel like mixing with you. sorry for a longish and cumbersome mail and thanks for raising this topic. with greetings and regards, Anirban Mukherjee, cell: 09433305139 be my friend everyone On 11/28/11, Rahul Bajaj <[email protected]> wrote: > Hi all, > > First of all, I would like to thank you all for your wonderful and > informative responses. > I would love to be friends with everyone in this group :) > > Even I happen to be very good in studies, so there are many people who > contact me when they have doubts/difficulties related to studies. > My problem is not that I don't have friends. > In fact, whenever I go for a class, I mostly have someone to talk to, > and I usually have a lot of fun with my friends. > The only problem is that my friends don't call me when they go to > other public places. > > Ajay, > > I really appreciate your views, and I somewhat agree with you. > However, I have always believed that I will make myself more dependent > on others if I don't have a sighted guide with me. > I believe that my friends think that, If I go somewhere only with my > friends, and if something goes wrong, then they will be the ones who > will be answerable. > However, if I have a sighted guide with me, then they won't have to > make any extra adjustments for me. > > Most of these plans are made after the class gets over. > So, it could also be that I usually don't end up being a part of these > plans merely because I mostly have to leave immediately after the > class gets over, because I have to go with a sighted guide and a > driver. > > > > > On 28/11/2011, Ajay Minocha <[email protected]> wrote: >> Hi shadab >> in 4th standard I also had the same situation >> I was really naughty so my teacher arainged special seet for me just >> closed to her away from class >> till 12th standard teachers would want me to sit on the 1st banch >> because they know as soon as the teacher stoppes then ajay starts >> and I was too naughty I didn't miss even a single chance to moov away >> from my seet while in lunch or between other interwells >> and my friends also supported me >> they injoyed my company >> when we used to sit in class and have a chat >> then it was their duty to let me know when teacher is watching by >> touching me or some thing else >> and I used to become silent at once >> but in my whole school life >> I didn't let my self to loose the top 5 positions of my class in studies >> when my parents used to go in parents teacher meeting then teacher would >> say >> " this boy is excilent in studies >> but he is equally naughty" >> regards >> >> >> On 11/28/11, payal <[email protected]> wrote: >>> Rahul, >>> >>> You've already received some excellent tips from others on this list. The >>> main thing I can surmise from these and my own experience with other >>> sighted >>> people is that you need to be comfortable in your own skin to ensure >>> others >>> see you exactly the same way, confident and ready to take the world on. >>> >>> At 17, all your friends have plenty on their own to prove to the world >>> and >>> thus will have little time to spare you if you don't make your presence >>> felt. As Ajay has rightly mentioned, your sighted guide is perhaps a >>> deterent. They need to feel like you want to be one of them and let them >>> do >>> all your guide perhaps does for you. You are not invisible, they need to >>> see >>> that. I still have trouble with people wanting to speak to my companion >>> rather than me, simply because they know no better and I'm forced to >>> remind >>> them I'm only blind and can use all other faculties just fine and don't >>> bite >>> either. >>> >>> Give yourself the time and space to know that you indeed are a part of >>> who >>> all of them are and slowly, but surely things will get better. There are >>> bigger things in life that will take precedence over this huge worry in >>> some >>> time. >>> >>> All the best. >>> >>> Payal >>> >>> -----Original Message----- >>> From: [email protected] >>> [mailto:[email protected]] On Behalf Of Rahul Bajaj >>> Sent: Sunday, November 27, 2011 11:23 PM >>> To: [email protected] >>> Subject: [AI] Socialising >>> >>> Hi all, >>> >>> I hope you all are well. >>> Like I've mentioned in my earlier posts, I'm 17 and am currently in 12th >>> grade. >>> I have quite a few sighted friends, but I've noticed that they hardly >>> ever call me when they go for movies, have birthday parties or have >>> get-togethers. >>> I feel that my visual impairment is a major reason for this. >>> We have appointed a sighted guide who goes with me everywhere. >>> >>> So, I often get depressed and frustrated when my friends don't call me. >>> In fact, for me, this is the biggest challenge that I currently have >>> to face due to my visual impairment. >>> I can't even ask my friends if they don't call me because of my visual >>> problem, because none of them will ever admit it. >>> >>> So, has anyone here faced this problem? >>> Please share your views and suggestions. >>> >>> Cheers, >>> Rahul >>> >>> >>> Search for old postings at: >>> http://www.mail-archive.com/[email protected]/ >>> >>> To unsubscribe send a message to >>> [email protected] >>> with the subject unsubscribe. >>> >>> To change your subscription to digest mode or make any other changes, >>> please >>> visit the list home page at >>> http://accessindia.org.in/mailman/listinfo/accessindia_accessindia.org.in >>> >>> >>> >>> Search for old postings at: >>> http://www.mail-archive.com/[email protected]/ >>> >>> To unsubscribe send a message to >>> [email protected] >>> with the subject unsubscribe. >>> >>> To change your subscription to digest mode or make any other changes, >>> please >>> visit the list home page at >>> http://accessindia.org.in/mailman/listinfo/accessindia_accessindia.org.in >>> >>> >> >> >> -- >> Ajay Minocha >> Mob : +91-7827188455 >> E mail : [email protected] >> [email protected] >> >> >> Search for old postings at: >> http://www.mail-archive.com/[email protected]/ >> >> To unsubscribe send a message to >> [email protected] >> with the subject unsubscribe. >> >> To change your subscription to digest mode or make any other changes, >> please >> visit the list home page at >> http://accessindia.org.in/mailman/listinfo/accessindia_accessindia.org.in >> >> > > > Search for old postings at: > http://www.mail-archive.com/[email protected]/ > > To unsubscribe send a message to > [email protected] > with the subject unsubscribe. > > To change your subscription to digest mode or make any other changes, please > visit the list home page at > http://accessindia.org.in/mailman/listinfo/accessindia_accessindia.org.in > > Search for old postings at: http://www.mail-archive.com/[email protected]/ To unsubscribe send a message to [email protected] with the subject unsubscribe. 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