which book...? On Wed, Jun 30, 2010 at 6:58 AM, rigsy03 <[email protected]> wrote:
> But thinking more about this- why were you attracted to these women to > begin with? Afterall, a label might just be a fable. It can be like a > "get out of jail" card, I suppose, but doesn't really solve much for > the supposedly "sane" partner.//I wrote lyric poetry for a while and > it had its own music without the notes- a percussion?//Keep the faith, > Darkwater! Lord- I was so enchanted and amazed to read a book the last > couple of days- at first. By the end I was shattered and probably > won't read the others I've reserved at the library. Reminds me of > love! :-) > > On Jun 29, 7:48 am, DarkwaterBlight <[email protected]> wrote: > > Sometimes, both music and words come to me like getting struck by > > lightning. Wakes me up out of a sound sleep and I have to grab my > > guitar and a pad and paper.. Other times I'll start with a tune and it > > can take months or even years before I write the lyrics. If I write > > lyrics, though, there is already a tune, in my head if not a comleted > > composition. I think that out of all the women I have been with, there > > might be one or two that had their stuff together but again, I was > > just 'fun to play with' for a while. The rest, if not already > > clinically diagnosed, they should be! The only long term > > relationships I've had were with total nut bags. :P I can only claim > > responsibilty for one of them though. > > > > On Jun 29, 8:02 am, rigsy03 <[email protected]> wrote: > > > > > > > > > I used to liken it to the "Perils of Pauline" because I seemed to > > > escape like that old silent film drama. Now, I consider my life as an > > > interesting one- one I have tried to make sense of and I think I > > > succeeded in many ways- but I'll die anyway! :-) I think everyday of > > > those who have been caught up in war or sub-human conditions and try > > > to be grateful and humble. My troubles and turmoil are/were > > > miniscule.//I tried to write lyrics for a composer friend but found it > > > hard to write to his competed music- I think it's easier to shape the > > > music to words- how about you?//I quit drinking nearly a year ago and > > > am much happier with life and others. > > > > > On Jun 28, 8:07 am, DarkwaterBlight <[email protected]> wrote: > > > > > > Interesting that you bring up the point of 'creator types'! I'm a > song > > > > writer/musician and I have been greatly influenced by my > relationships > > > > in my music and writing. It seems when there is much turmoil the > music > > > > and lyrics flow. Vam is correct in saying that it's not possible to > > > > succeed in turning our emotions off and truly that was never my > intent > > > > but as a defense mechanism I have learned to stuff them. It proves to > > > > be detrimental in some ways, particularly in writing. I have blocked > > > > much of my muse in trying to minimize the drama. Truth is that life > is > > > > just that, a set in which we all play out our own dramas. I was once > > > > told by a woman I dated that I love drama and created it. I perceived > > > > it as her projecting her own tendencies on me ut she may have been > > > > correct to some extent. I did alot of writing around that time! LOL! > > > > > > On Jun 28, 5:15 am, rigsy03 <[email protected]> wrote: > > > > > > > A number of creator types stay single or have arrangements that > allow > > > > > for a good deal of freedom but that does not guarantee inspiration > in > > > > > and of itself. Often, creativity feeds just as well on pressured > > > > > enviornments and committments.//I doubt most children feel better > off > > > > > without both parents but the notion of family has changed greatly > so > > > > > perhaps they adapt better these days. And a wretched marriage is > > > > > wretched for all plus what is lonlier than a bad marriage? > Sometimes > > > > > it seems strange that I took to motherhood considering...But > > > > > motherhood has also changed, hasn't it? > > > > > > > On Jun 27, 1:49 pm, vamadevananda <[email protected]> wrote: > > > > > > > > " I have turned my emotional switch to 0." > > > > > > > > We all do that. And can never succeed, because emotions are > another > > > > > > name of human experience. They are ours. > > > > > > > > Yes, some of us are better off without life partner > relationships. > > > > > > Mostly, for the sake of the other. Rarely, for oneself ... for > some > > > > > > higher priority we must pursue. > > > > > > > > On Jun 27, 11:18 pm, DarkwaterBlight <[email protected]> > wrote: > > > > > > > > > Spiritual Crisis? Yes I believe you may be correct in your > > > > > > > observation. I think I have developed a willful ignorance or > lack of > > > > > > > empathy when it comes to emotions. I have tried to share my > feelings > > > > > > > to no avail and have been left dissapointed and feeling broken. > So in > > > > > > > an attenpt to heal I have turned my emotional switch to 0. I > can see > > > > > > > my own spiritual crisis and do not wish to have the > responsibility of > > > > > > > someone elses 'baggage' as rigsy03 has pointed out. After our > > > > > > > seperation I tryed again to no avail and yet I still try to > make that > > > > > > > connection and keep hitting the same brick wall. I know the > answer > > > > > > > lies within myself but I'm not sure if I want to know it. I > guess I > > > > > > > like living in the dillusion that I am fine being alone in > life. I > > > > > > > know that is never true as we all have each other but I am > refering to > > > > > > > a permanant mate and partner in life. It's too easy for me to > give up > > > > > > > on the idea rather than trying so hard and fighting to keep a > > > > > > > relationship. I know too well that there are many fish in the > sea and > > > > > > > I love seafood. > > > > > > > > > On Jun 26, 12:54 pm, vamadevananda <[email protected]> > wrote: > > > > > > > > > > " Emotionally draining, we literally sucked the life out of > each > > > > > > > > other." > > > > > > > > > > Do you believe or are able to conceive, in the face of your > contrary > > > > > > > > experience, that it is possible for two people to graduate to > ' giving > > > > > > > > life to each other,' rather than sucking, to ' enriching each > other > > > > > > > > emotionally,' than draining ? > > > > > > > > > > Do you recall the movie sketching the life an authoress, > played by > > > > > > > > Kate Winslet, and her male live - in fan, whose > disappointments and > > > > > > > > spiritual crisis in later age anyone could empathise with ! > > > > > > > > > > On Jun 26, 7:41 pm, DarkwaterBlight < > [email protected]> wrote: > > > > > > > > > > > Truly I did have expectations, in the begining of my > marriage, that > > > > > > > > > were the fairy tale type. Reality struck hard early on in > our > > > > > > > > > realtionship, we were both poor and from dysfunctional > backrounds. We > > > > > > > > > were very aware of the pitfalls in life and dated 4 years > before > > > > > > > > > getting married. When we finally did get married, she was 5 > months > > > > > > > > > pregnant. We have three children who are 4 yearrs apart in > age now and > > > > > > > > > our youngest is going to be 9. We were, (and probably still > are) in > > > > > > > > > love. It doesn't make a lot of sense to me so it's really > hard to > > > > > > > > > explain. I know that she would have me back and I would too > but it > > > > > > > > > makes absolutely no sense. There is no logical explaination > I can give > > > > > > > > > but I will never allow myself to feel that way about > another woman > > > > > > > > > because it is too painful. Emotionally draining, we > literally sucked > > > > > > > > > the life out of each other. > > > > > > > > > > > On Jun 26, 12:33 am, ashok tewari <[email protected]> > wrote: > > > > > > > > > > > > It does, Slip, but does not indicate if the case was one > of fairy tale > > > > > > > > > > expectations from relationships in ' love,' to start > with. > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sat, Jun 26, 2010 at 5:00 AM, Slip Disc < > [email protected]> wrote: > > > > > > > > > > > All cultural disparity aside, Vam, the "imho" (in my > humble opinion) > > > > > > > > > > > clearly indicates the subjectivity in the statement. > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Jun 25, 4:49 pm, vamadevananda < > [email protected]> wrote: > > > > > > > > > > > > " Imho, being 'in love' is, as Arch says, a fairy > tale." > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Wouldn't it be more accurate to state that of ' > love,' as you or Arch > > > > > > > > > > > > understand or mean it ! ? It would be a great service > to let your > > > > > > > > > > > > readers know that and, better still, to actually > state what you > > > > > > > > > > > > understand or what your ' love ' means to you, as in > what it does to > > > > > > > > > > > > you, how it affects you, what place it has in your > hierarchy of > > > > > > > > > > > > values ? > > > > > > > > > > > > > > For instance, if you've fallen for the fairy tale > kind of love, you > > > > > > > > > > > > will end up with disappointments appropriate to fairy > tale kind of > > > > > > > > > > > > love ! > > > > > > > > > > > > > > And, this isn't semantics. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Jun 25, 7:29 pm, DarkwaterBlight < > [email protected]> wrote: > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I guess depending on how fast you want to travel it > could be both! I' > > > > > > > > > > > > > have been reluctant to reply to this thread but I > do share some of > > > > > > > > > > > > > your views PSK. Truth is that I have been married > for close to 20 > > > > > > > > > > > > > years now but I have not lived with my wife for > clos to 5 years. We > > > > > > > > > > > > > are both much happier than we were when we lived > together. I have had > > > > > > > > > > > > > a few long term relationships since and they were > just too much for me > > > > > > > > > > > > > personally. I have a GF now and she wants to pin me > down, I feel > > > > > > > > > > > > > smothered. We lived together for a while and I > wound up excomunicating > > > > > > > > > > > > > her from the solice of my abode. We are still > 'together' but during > > > > > > > > > > > > > the course of our 1 year relationship I have had > (and still do have) a > > > > > > > > > > > > > few different partners including her best friend > who has shared our > > > > > > > > > > > > > bed on different occasions. She want's monagamy > until we GET MARRIED! > > > > > > > > > > > > > Imagine that! I'm still married to the mother of my > children and I > > > > > > > > > > > > > don't see that changing. Polyamorous relationships > ARE possible but it > > > > > > > > > > > > > takes complete transparancy and a strong commitment > to your > > > > > > > > > > > > > 'significant' other. I, however transparent I may > be, can only be > > > > > > > > > > > > > commited to being a father and a good friend! I > love her and all of > > > > > > > > > > > > > the women who I have 'known' equally. The love that > some women require > > > > > > > > > > > > > I cannot and will not provide. Too emotional and > without logic! Imho, > > > > > > > > > > > > > being 'in > > > > ... > > > > read more ยป- Hide quoted text - > > > > - Show quoted text - > -- \--/ Peace
