I LOVED THESE. Becky ----- Original Message ----- From: steve doyle To: [email protected] Sent: Thursday, September 20, 2007 7:39 AM Subject: [RecipesAndMore] On the Lighter Side...
On the Lighter Side... BUILDING FUND The pastor stood up one Sunday and announced to his congregation, "I have good news and bad news. The good news is that we have enough money to pay for our new building program! The bad news is that it's still out there in your pockets." PREACHER PARKING A minister parked his car in a no-parking zone in a large city because he was short of time and couldn't find a space with a meter. So he put a note under the windshield wiper that read: "I have circled the block 10 times. If I don't park here, I'll miss my appointment. FORGIVE US OUR TRESPASSES." When he returned, he found a citation from a police officer along with this note. "I've circled this block for 10 years. If I don't give you a ticket, I'll lose my job. LEAD US NOT INTO TEMPTATION." SERVICE FOR ONE On Sunday, the new young pastor arrived at church and found only an old farmer had shown up. After waiting a while, the disappointed pastor remarked to the old farmer, "Well, it appears no one else is coming, so we should probably cancel service today." The farmer, dressed in his Sunday best, looked at the young preacher and said, "Well pastor, I don't know much 'bout preachin', but I do know something bout farmin' and if I went out in the field and found only one cow, I'd still feed 'em." This excited the young preacher who preached for the next 45 minutes a fierce fire and brimstone sermon. Afterwards the pastor asked the old farmer what he thought. The old farmer remarked, "Well pastor, I don't know much 'bout preachin', but I do know somethin' 'bout farmin' and if I went out in the field and found only one cow, I wouldn't give 'em the whole bale." LIKE GOD My grandson was visiting one day when he asked, "Grandma, do you know how you and God are alike?" I mentally polished my halo while I asked, "No, honey, how are we alike?" "You're both old," he replied. lr smiles --~--~---------~--~----~------------~-------~--~----~ Access the Recipes And More list archives at: http://www.mail-archive.com/recipesandmore%40googlegroups.com/ Visit the group home page at: http://groups.google.com/group/RecipesAndMore -~----------~----~----~----~------~----~------~--~---
