Be careful about calling peopled "old folks."  :)  The majority of
genealogists are the older segment of our society!!

I think it's just different personalities.  There are people who are helpful
and like to share.  My father was an only child.  His first cousin (female)
is also an only child.  Their mothers were twins.  Although they played
together a little bit when small, they didn't when they were older (moved
away).  To see them now, you'd think that they were siblings.  Both are in
their 70s and the moniker "helpful Henry" must be their motto.  They'll
share, think about things, and later remember the story.  It's just their
nature to go and help others (I think it came from their moms).

On the other hand, there's my mom.  She's the most unhelpful person you'd
ever meet.  If you pulled into the gas station needing directions and asked
her how to get to such and such place, she'd feign ignorance - and this is
not a recent thing.  She just won't help people (my dad and his cousin would
say "Let me get a piece of paper and I'll draw you a map.")  Yes, it seems
to be magnified more with age.  It's like pulling teeth with my mom to get
her to help with genealogy - and she's ALWAYS been this way.

A lot of the questioning and dates have to do with the way the question is
asked.  I have my father's baby book.  Under gifts, his mother wrote,
"Beautiful bonnet from baby's great-grandmother, Azore Islands."  Since my
dad is half Portuguese, this was one of two women.  On my first trip to the
Azores, I had a translator.  We had found a cousin.  I had my translator ask
her if she knew her grandparents.  She said one grandmother (and named her)
was dead by the time she was born.  I then knew which great-grandma had sent
the bonnet for my father in 1934.  I had my translator ask her if she knew
what year the other grandmother had died.  She didn't know.  So I asked him
to ask her HOW OLD she was when the grandmother died.  He looked at me and
said that he already asked and she didn't know.  I said it was a different
question and to ask her.  Her answer was that she was 17.  I asked when she
was born and bingo!   I had an approximate date of death.

I had the same problem with my boyfriend's father.  He came to America in
1930 from Poland.  He was only 5.  So what he remembers is playing games
with the other children.  But his only remaining sister was 12 in 1930.  I
was told she doesn't remember anything.  I got to meet her this past
summer.  Being 12 when immigrating here, she remembers a lot more.  Since we
were in a restaurant, I didn't have a lot of time to talk to her, but I told
my boyfriend and his brother, she does remember, it's the questioning
technique and we need to go to her house and interview her some more.

I got the questioning technique information from "Unpuzzling Your Past," by
Emily Anne Croom.  See if your local public library has it.  People can seem
to remember how old they were when something happened, or at least tell you
that they were a teenager or a small child (you have to ask around what age
small children are, though).  You can use historical events too...did it
happen before or after WWII?  Things like that.  You may not always get an
exact date but you may narrow down the range considerably.

Cheri Mello
Listowner, Azores-Gen
Researching: Vila Franca, Ponta Garca, Ribeira Quente, R. das Tainhas,
Achada

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