On 9/16/2012 9:29 AM, Craig Weinberg wrote:
Background: After refusing to serve Bruno's brother in law with the simulated brain at my restaurant, I decide to make peace by inviting myself to go along with Brother in law B1ll to his favorite restaurant.

"It's the best in the city!", says B1ll.

"That sounds great, because I am really hungry.", I reply anxiously.

When we arrive we find a dark, silent building, full of empty seats. B1ll gestures for me to sit which I do and, it suddenly sounds like a restaurant. I hear sizzling and clanking for the kitchen and suddenly a waiter appears, offering me a menu. Just as I notice that the waiter bears a curious resemblance to Bruno, I wonder why he has not given B1ll a menu too.

"I've already ordered", says B1ll.

I look down at the menu, but I see only one item on it. It is called "The thing that you want to order". Wow. This is impressive. I look up and notice that what the waiter's nametag says.

"Ok, Brun-0, you win. I'll have a number not-not-one, with everything on it."

"Coming right up, monsieur. Would you like Löbian salad or Gödelian soup with that? The umlauts are excellent this time of year"


"Voila", Brun-0 exclaims.

Seeing the confusion on my face, he gestures at the menu in my hand with a gracefully circular extension of his fingers, over and over, rotating in space hypnotically, until I realize that he wants me to turn the menu over.

On the back of the menu is a beautiful HD video screen, which pops into life with a movie of someone sitting at...Hey!! It's Me!

It's a movie of me, rendered so perfectly it looks absolutely real. I am being served a giant silver domed platter, which is removed to unveil a beautiful...menu. The camera pans down the gorgeous menu of sumptuous sounding descriptions of food. As the camera zooms into a closeup on the calligraphy, it can be seen that each culinary turn of phrase is constructed of beautifully written formulas and equations like G and Gp where p is delicious and G = emulated gustatory resource and p = Non-regurgitation parameters'.

To my surprise, I now witness myself in the movie pick a fork and knife and begin eating the menu and thoroughly enjoying every bite. I seem to be making the exact yummy sounds and faces that I would expect.

Turning to B1ll, I ask,

"What did you order?"

"I already ate.", he replies.

As I look down at my clean plate and remember the great meal that I just had, I feel unusually satisfied. Curiously I can't remember exactly what it was that I ate, but I no reason to care. I can't care. I believe that I must have eaten exactly what I wanted.

Check out the Matrix version of this story: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z7BuQFUhsRM




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