" ... On May 16, 5:12 pm, Slip Disc <[email protected]> wrote: ... "

> At least you never been one to engage
> any denial.  Admission is the most powerful tool of change.

Aye, I've found that two of the most destructive things one may do is
to lie to oneself and lie to others about oneself.  The flip side of
that coin is that I've found out is just how great a tool admission of
truth is.  It overpowers liars, those in denial, injustice and a slew
of other wrongs in this world -- if for no other reason than it's the
high road, but there are countless other benefits that come one's way
from truth-telling.  The only downside I can think of is that many
people who lie to themselves never tend to believe the truth in any
form.

Besides, once one has said the worst things about oneself, no one else
can say anything worse.  It's a good defense mechanism.

> Couldn't
> you tell that the writer of the post I pulled from the thread is me?

I'm sorry Slip, I wasn't even looking to identify the writer.  The
fact that you picked it out and repeated it to me was sufficient to
give it attention and credence.  But on second reading, I think I can
see you in it.

> "Well, I suppose were I to be perfectly honest....."
>
> Thanks for being perfectly honest!  You would rely on your own
> speculations which are no more or less contrived than that of others.
> Your non belief is your belief, which of course again fits into your
> comfort zone as others in your life are viewed as the core of your
> discontentment, the cause of all the bad effect. Therefore it is
> reasonable for you to feel apprehensive towards a reliance on the
> external.  There is nothing wrong with that and many of us feel the
> same way and do not subscribe to any worldly view save our own.  We
> are open to listening and learning about but that seems to be the end
> of it.

That is but part of it.  I may not rely on any speculations other than
my own, but those speculations are comprised of insights and
information gained from those whose words of many I have come to
respect -- more than a few of which inhabit Mind's Eye.

> I don't see you as a fruit fly but just that thought emanating from
> within reveals once again your less than grandiose view of your
> 'self'.  This I see as detrimental in the sense that, as I've
> expressed many times, what you think is what you get.

There is another aspect I think you neglect or perhaps may not have
recognized in me ... that being that another reason for holding a
lesser view of myself is that it is a check on an ego that could get
way out of hand were I not to keep a tight control over it.  One
example, I have twice been promoted to management and within hours
have fired a majority of the workers under me before being fired
myself.  Power goes to my head, it seems, so I keep it in check via
self-effacement.  At least that is one aspect of my inner directed
denigration.  Another from a slightly different perspective is that to
a significant degree I actually still hold those feelings about myself
but in many ways have made them less able to influence my actions.  I
have disempowered them to a reasonable degree.

> You can bring
> about positive change with positive thought.  Did you ever hear about
> the hunchback who stood up straight simply because he thought he
> could?

No, never have, but I don't doubt it.  I've seen and credibly heard of
many such examples of the power of the mind.  I am a firm believer in
it, especially in the field of physical health.  Even the most narrow-
minded and unimaginative physician is well aware that a person's
mental attitude has a great deal to do with their ability to heal and
mend their own bodies.  I think my first awakening to the power of the
mind came from Colin Wilson's Philosopher's Stone.

> Do you ever think that you may come back as a great leader, a
> global icon who changed the world, a brilliant person who amasses
> great wealth or a scientist who finds the cure all for the ills of the
> world?

I try not to dwell there.  It's too dangerous a place for someone who
has held his ego in tight rein for so long, but I've noticed over the
years that in certain situations I have the ability to draw people to
me.  I could easily become a cult leader or some other such
misanthrope I think.

What seems strange, even to me, is the paradox of how someone can hold
two such diametrically opposed perspectives of themselves in
containment.  Like many others, I strongly identified with Spock.

> Or are you always the cockroach who dies an agonizing death
> after getting caught in a Raid shower without an umbrella?

Perhaps not a cockroach in a Raid shower -- more like Kafka's roach
upon awakening and finding himself so.

> I don't believe anything of another life to be that of random chance.  I
> believe the condition of the soul and the advancements in knowledge
> and experience it has acquired in past lives contribute to the future
> life cycle.

That may well be the reality of it, but I can't find any logical or
rational explanation as to why one soul, awareness, identity is born
to one family and not another nor what lies in store for some of the
human monsters our species has spawned.

> Primordial beginnings do not represent technological,
> literary and philosophical advances but simple primal instincts which
> carried us forward, each time gathering new understandings of the
> universe.

Yes, I see it that way too.  Sort of like a rolling stone gathering
every growing layers of moss-like knowledge, insight and wisdom till
we're a thick, slow and old very furry rock.

> Eventually some were born with an old soul (still
> relatively new) that had more knowledge that allowed discovery of
> tools, fire, speech etc.

Yes, yes, and yes.  The chimp in 2001 who picked up the bone of an ass
and saw its potential as a weapon was an old soul, I suspect.

> And here we are today, you and I,
> communicating on the world wide web, thousands of miles apart from
> each other, each with a soul full to near capacity with knowledge and
> experience.

Truly amazing but not unexpected either, yes?

> By the way gruff, you never did give back my arrowhead you
> stole out of my cave!  Not very nice!

But it looks so nice hanging on a golden chain centered above my
fireplace mantle glistening it's obsidian facets in the flickering
light of the fire while a spit pig roasts slowly over the open flame
and a flagon of the finest mead waits it's owner's visit.


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