In fact the reality is the opposite. In surveys done with women, lifetime exposure for women is high (between 1/3 and 1/2 of all women will be abused by an intimate partner at some point in her lifetime), however - despite stereotypes and the skewed perspective many of us have due to our work - many many women escape and don't continue to be victimized or to get into abusive relationships. Many also escape early in the relationship when signs are clear that the partner is willing to be violent. Men who batter usually abuse multiple partners and do not stop using violence without intervention. This information is important to help counter the misinformation that victims are somehow "damaged" people who are drawn towards violent partners, or who bring the violence on themselves. See what I mean? I believe this would also hold true for gay and lesbian partners who use violence but we need much more research and understanding in these areas to understand the impact of gender conditioning when relationships are not heterosexual.
Having said this, when we are injured as children or adults and have not healed, perceptive perpetrators will seek out vulnerability and move into relationship with people they can take advantage of most easily. There are also situational (vs. psychological) vulnerabilities such as poverty, marginalization due to ethnicity, educational status, physical ability, language, immigration status, sexual orientation, etc., that perpetrators take advantage of as well. Because of these factors some survivors have less resources (both internal and external) to support their escape or to build healthy lives independent of perpetrators. And isn't it just amazing how so many do anyway!!! Thanks for listening, Elaine >> [EMAIL PROTECTED] 01/10/02 06:42AM >>> >I have a question...Statistics show that women will get themselves into >similar relationships unless counselling helps them break the pattern, but do >men tend to batter successive partners or does their behavior focus on one >particular partner? (Will they repeat this behavior, in other words, with >other partners?) Elaine Walters Domestic Violence Intervention Project McKenzie-Willamette Hospital 1460 G Street Springfield, OR 97477 USA Email: [EMAIL PROTECTED] (541)744-8507 fax (541)744-8548 http://www.familyallies.net ***End-violence is sponsored by UNIFEM and receives generous support from ICAP*** To post a message, send it to: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> To subscribe or unsubscribe, send a message to: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>. In the 1st line of the message type: subscribe end-violence OR type: unsubscribe end-violence Archives of previous End-violence messages can be found at: http://www.edc.org/GLG/end-violence/hypermail/
