[***Moderators' note: Next week we will start a new discussion on
prevention and developing safe environments for women and how to learn from
some fascinating initiatives from around the world. Next week we will also
post a summary of the discussion on the Working Group during the past four
weeks.***]

At 10:53 AM 1/31/02, Janey Skinner wrote:
 >I find this discussion fascinating, if highly inconclusive.

I don't find the discussion fascinating, but I do find it inconclusive, and
even more I find it tangential to the safety concerns of battered women and
their advocates.

 >I have worked with feminist women's organizations (mostly) that have
 >partnered with pro-feminist men to offer re-education for batterers, using a
 >mix of methods but with a heavy skew toward questioning male socialization
 >and privilege.  I am currently working with a community where there are a
 >high percentage of Pacific Islanders.  The people I have worked with in the
 >Pacific Islander community are much more in favor of a batterer "treatment"
 >program that is less directly challenging of the abuse, and more focused on
 >the overall wellness of the men and their families, as what they see as a
 >more culturally-appropriate response to the violence.

If you ask any battered woman, does she want her abuser to change so they
can keep the family together, of course she will say yes. This is true
across cultures. However, experience has taught us that while she's waiting
for him to change, she is in grave danger. In the meantime, precious
resources that could be spent on her safety and security are squandered in
futile and unproven attempts to change him. I have long given up the
struggle to figure out why abusers abuse. They do it because they can, and
because it gives them results.

I would like to suggest to the moderators that we talk about some different
topics, such as effective advocacy for women. I was fascinated to read of
the experience of some of the women's programs in Africa and I would like
to hear more. I notice that African women have not been contributing to
this discussion to any great extent. Perhaps it is because--on a continent
where many women experience great deprivation and danger--abuser treatment
is not as big a concern as women's survival.



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