Oh, Kim, I have been through this so many times and so many times I've said "I 
killed my cat/tortoise/lizard/snake/whatever." You did not kill her. You did 
the best you could at the time with the information you had, and I am so sorry 
that you feel this way. It's normal to blame oneself but hindsight is 20/20; a 
cliche, I know, but so true.
On St Patrick's Day my FeLV+ cat, Bridget, died at the vet. She was there to be 
spayed but never made it to the table - they put her under and she died. 
Horrible. But what was even more horrible was that I had a premonition that she 
would die during surgery, for weeks. A voice literally screamed in my head. 
DON'T DO IT, SHE WILL DIE. And yet I did it, and got that awful phone call from 
the vet. That night I posted on this forum - "it's my fault, I killed her." I 
was so grateful for the assurances from other members that no, I didn't kill 
her.....I tried my best and something happened. I am sure that many other folks 
will have a similar story. 

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