Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night...
Mike Such kind words! Bless you. ~Bonnie - Original Message - From: Mike Finch jpact...@yahoo.com To: felvtalk@felineleukemia.org Sent: Monday, November 08, 2010 11:55 AM Subject: Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night... Dear Kim, So glad that you have the other three to help ease your hurt. Thank you for sharing images of the joy you two experienced. Paws on the face is one of the most 'human things they do, and is such a personal expression from them to us. In response, who hasn't munched down on those spongy little pads and play gobbled them up and not been bothered a bit by the sudden chalkiness of a little tidbit of litter! ;D To hear you focusing on those kinds of special moments means your heart is already mending, even though, yes, it will be very slow, especially in lost relationships. Each day the brokenness grows less, and God helps us to see through the clearer eyes of grace rather than the blurriness of sorrow. A little more emphasis on every precious moment you had with her comes more naturally than a painful thought or regret, and suddenly somehow you can talk about it without growing a pumpkin in your throat. :) That's God healing his child who honored him by loving and caring for his creation. God bless, Mike :) ___ Felvtalk mailing list Felvtalk@felineleukemia.org http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org ___ Felvtalk mailing list Felvtalk@felineleukemia.org http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org
Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night...
Beautifully said, Mike. Love animals: God has given them the rudiments of thought and joy untroubled. Do not trouble their joy, don't harass them, don't deprive them of their happiness, don't work against God's intent. Man, do not pride yourself on superiority to animals; they are without sin, and you, with your greatness, defile the earth by your appearance on it, and leave the traces of your foulness after you - alas, it is true of almost every one of us!~Fyodor Dostoyevsky -Original Message- From: felvtalk-boun...@felineleukemia.org [mailto:felvtalk-boun...@felineleukemia.org] On Behalf Of Bonnie Hogue Sent: Wednesday, November 10, 2010 5:10 PM To: felvtalk@felineleukemia.org Subject: Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night... Mike Such kind words! Bless you. ~Bonnie - Original Message - From: Mike Finch jpact...@yahoo.com To: felvtalk@felineleukemia.org Sent: Monday, November 08, 2010 11:55 AM Subject: Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night... Dear Kim, So glad that you have the other three to help ease your hurt. Thank you for sharing images of the joy you two experienced. Paws on the face is one of the most 'human things they do, and is such a personal expression from them to us. In response, who hasn't munched down on those spongy little pads and play gobbled them up and not been bothered a bit by the sudden chalkiness of a little tidbit of litter! ;D To hear you focusing on those kinds of special moments means your heart is already mending, even though, yes, it will be very slow, especially in lost relationships. Each day the brokenness grows less, and God helps us to see through the clearer eyes of grace rather than the blurriness of sorrow. A little more emphasis on every precious moment you had with her comes more naturally than a painful thought or regret, and suddenly somehow you can talk about it without growing a pumpkin in your throat. :) That's God healing his child who honored him by loving and caring for his creation. God bless, Mike :) ___ Felvtalk mailing list Felvtalk@felineleukemia.org http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org ___ Felvtalk mailing list Felvtalk@felineleukemia.org http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org ___ Felvtalk mailing list Felvtalk@felineleukemia.org http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org
Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night...
Dear Kim, So glad that you have the other three to help ease your hurt. Thank you for sharing images of the joy you two experienced. Paws on the face is one of the most 'human things they do, and is such a personal expression from them to us. In response, who hasn't munched down on those spongy little pads and play gobbled them up and not been bothered a bit by the sudden chalkiness of a little tidbit of litter! ;D To hear you focusing on those kinds of special moments means your heart is already mending, even though, yes, it will be very slow, especially in lost relationships. Each day the brokenness grows less, and God helps us to see through the clearer eyes of grace rather than the blurriness of sorrow. A little more emphasis on every precious moment you had with her comes more naturally than a painful thought or regret, and suddenly somehow you can talk about it without growing a pumpkin in your throat. :) That's God healing his child who honored him by loving and caring for his creation. God bless, Mike :) ___ Felvtalk mailing list Felvtalk@felineleukemia.org http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org
Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night...
Dear Kim, Your little baby just couldn't do it any more. That's all. Her little precious life just expended itself. All the while she did have life in her, she had the warmth of your loving touch and the softness of your lips against her too, as surely you kissed her a thousand times or more in her brief little life. Love is our only true form of communication with these precious creatures God has blessed us with, so you no doubt talked her little ears off. :) I know you are suffering and questioning yourself. That's natural. Just don't burden yourself with too much of the latter. You didn't intend any harm upon her, so your heart is pure. Please believe that. I cried for you this morning knowing the pain you are feeling, and my heart hurts for you. Let me, and others here, lift you up with our prayers and affirmations of your love and kindness. May God bless you. Mike 3 ___ Felvtalk mailing list Felvtalk@felineleukemia.org http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org
Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night...
Mike, thank you for your insight! I printed your e-mail and will keep it on my desk. Although I haven't had a pet loss in over a year, I do have pets and when that future day comes around when I am, again, in that awful pain I can look at it and be comforted. Thanks. Sally J. Nordstrom Ms. Sally Jo's Oversized Escorts 2629 N. Booth St. Milwaukee, WI 53212 Phone: (414) 687-2333 Fax: (414) 377-4777 e-mail: ms...@sbcglobal.net $1M insurance WA NY Certified GA Amber Light Permit Landstar approved GPS Equipped Passport - will run Canada References available upon request Member CERT (Community Emergency Response Team - Department of Homeland Security) --- On Sun, 11/7/10, Mike Finch jpact...@yahoo.com wrote: From: Mike Finch jpact...@yahoo.com Subject: Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night... To: felvtalk@felineleukemia.org Date: Sunday, November 7, 2010, 6:52 AM Dear Kim, Your little baby just couldn't do it any more. That's all. Her little precious life just expended itself. All the while she did have life in her, she had the warmth of your loving touch and the softness of your lips against her too, as surely you kissed her a thousand times or more in her brief little life. Love is our only true form of communication with these precious creatures God has blessed us with, so you no doubt talked her little ears off. :) I know you are suffering and questioning yourself. That's natural. Just don't burden yourself with too much of the latter. You didn't intend any harm upon her, so your heart is pure. Please believe that. I cried for you this morning knowing the pain you are feeling, and my heart hurts for you. Let me, and others here, lift you up with our prayers and affirmations of your love and kindness. May God bless you. Mike 3 ___ Felvtalk mailing list Felvtalk@felineleukemia.org http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org ___ Felvtalk mailing list Felvtalk@felineleukemia.org http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org
Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night...
Hi, Kim - I've been doing this only 19 years, officially - before then it was on my own, since I was a kid, with my parents, etc. That sounds like a horrible caseI have never come across anything like that as the mother cat killing her kittensAnd, yes, the Strongid-T dosage depends highly on the size and weight of a cat/kitten. My vet is very careful with it, always warning me to dose appropriately! I remember another vet years ago who was very lax in the use of the amount of Strongid-T that was administeredYou still shouldn't blame yourself for any part for the kitten's death, after all, one hopes to be able to rely on a veterinarians' expertise! I suppose the lesson is to always listen to your inner voice and when in doubt, rely on it more. Natalie -Original Message- From: felvtalk-boun...@felineleukemia.org [mailto:felvtalk-boun...@felineleukemia.org] On Behalf Of Kim Sent: Saturday, November 06, 2010 8:37 PM To: felvtalk@felineleukemia.org Subject: Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night... Hi Natalie, I've been doing this for 20 years now and this year has been my worst year ever. About 2 months ago, I removed a cat from the pound who just had 4 kittens the night before. The kittens weren't even 24 hours old yet and they were waiting in line to be pts. Well, 2 weeks after she was in my home she came down with a horrible URI and my vet assured me that the kittens would be protected by the mother's milk and they would not get it. Well, long story short, they got it. Then the mother cat decided to drown one in the water bowl and she deheaded the other one. After feeding the other 2 with a stomach tube and doing sub q fluids I had to take the last 2 of her kittens to be put to sleep because they kept fading. The mother cat is doing fine now though. This is only a small sample of my year with kittens. I was talking to my husband and we both feel like the kitten was given too much wormer. I doubt the kitten that only weighed 3/4 pound should have been given the same amount as her siblings who weighed 2 and 1/4 pounds. I can only go by what my vet tells me. I brought them all in to the vet's office when I first got them. My first guess was worms when the little kitten was throwing up. My vet tested the poop samples and they came back negative. Then I was told the little kitten who was throwing up had mega esophagus. I babied her for a month and had her in and out of the vet's office. Thursday night when I saw the roundworms being thrown up I felt like she would improve once wormed. This time I saw a different vet in the same office who agreed that she could be full of worms and that was causing her to throw up; might not be mega esophagus. The breathing problems only started Monday night, 5 days before I saw the worms being thrown up. I'm trying not to blame myself but I do feel like if the vet had wormed them all at four weeks old this would be a whole new story with a different ending. I do blame myself for not being more assertive in getting them wormed earlier. My vet doesn't like to worm animals if their poop samples don't show any signs of parasites. I've told them time and time again that animals can have normal samples but still have parasites. They just don't show up at the time of the testing. I also blame myself for not questioning my vet for not giving me an antibiotic to give at home when we were there on Monday night. She gave my kitten an antibiotic injection but nothing went home with me. When I was there on Friday getting them wormed I asked about the need for antibiotics (in case she had pneumonia) and she told me that she had forgotten to give me an antibiotic on Monday and remembered it after we had left the office. I don't know why my vet couldn't have called me and had me come back to get it. When I left the vet's office on Monday my vet told me that my kitten would most likely die that night. Well, she didn't, she actually improved and was playing and eating well and throwing up minimally. She had a bad day Thursday and after I saw the worms being thrown up I knew in my heart what her problem was all along. I had very high hopes of her improving after she was wormed but that didn't happen. It was her worst, last few hours ever. I am so sorry about your kitten, Puddles. I've raised the newborn orphans for 20 years now (it's what I do for the humane society here because no one else wants to put the time into them that's needed to keep them alive) and I've syringe fed them all with very good outcomes. I've lost only a handful and several have had FeLV or congenital problems or neurological disorders but have done well. I appreciate what you did for Puddles and I know Puddles did, too. Kim ...Saving just one pet won't change the worldbut surely the world will change for that one pet... The top ten reasons to spay and neuter your dog or cat were killed in a shelter today. -Original Message- From: felvtalk-boun
Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night...
Mike, I truly do appreciate your email. Your words were very comforting to read and the prayers are very much needed. You're right, I kissed her all the time and was constantly talking to her. I truly didn't intend to harm my kitten. I really was trying to help her. I'd do anything to have her with me again. She loved for me to carry her around and she would snuggle up in my arms and look up at me with those gorgeous eyes of hers and touch my face with her paws. It will take me along time to get over this. I miss her so much. I took time away from her three siblings while I had her and she needed me so now I am trying to make up for that and give to them because they are giving so much love to me right now. They are trying so hard to comfort me. Thank you so much for this email, Mike. Kim ...Saving just one pet won't change the worldbut surely the world will change for that one pet... The top ten reasons to spay and neuter your dog or cat were killed in a shelter today. -Original Message- From: felvtalk-boun...@felineleukemia.org [mailto:felvtalk-boun...@felineleukemia.org] On Behalf Of Mike Finch Sent: Sunday, November 07, 2010 7:52 AM To: felvtalk@felineleukemia.org Subject: Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night... Dear Kim, Your little baby just couldn't do it any more. That's all. Her little precious life just expended itself. All the while she did have life in her, she had the warmth of your loving touch and the softness of your lips against her too, as surely you kissed her a thousand times or more in her brief little life. Love is our only true form of communication with these precious creatures God has blessed us with, so you no doubt talked her little ears off. :) I know you are suffering and questioning yourself. That's natural. Just don't burden yourself with too much of the latter. You didn't intend any harm upon her, so your heart is pure. Please believe that. I cried for you this morning knowing the pain you are feeling, and my heart hurts for you. Let me, and others here, lift you up with our prayers and affirmations of your love and kindness. May God bless you. Mike 3 ___ Felvtalk mailing list Felvtalk@felineleukemia.org http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org ___ Felvtalk mailing list Felvtalk@felineleukemia.org http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org
[Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night...
I am having such a hard time today with my kitten's death. My little kitten that was 2 months old died last night. She weighed 3/4 of a pound. She was the runt of the litter that I had raised since they were four weeks old. She has been a huge challenge for me the month I had her. My vet first thought she had mega esophagus but then wasn't so sure when she threw up roundworms. She had a problem keeping her food down since the very beginning. Anyway, Friday, my vet wormed her, and her three siblings. She was doing great yesterday until around 7 pm. I gave her a small bowl of KMR and shortly afterwards she started having difficulty breathing and was breathing through her mouth. She had eaten canned kitten food earlier and was doing fine. She died while I was holding her trying to give her a sub q injection. I don't know what I was thinking. I know I killed her. She couldn't breathe and I was trying to hold her still and evidently I had her in a position that her breathing worse because she just went limp and died in my hands. It was so fast that I didn't even get to give her any fluids. I knew she was having troubles breathing but yet I held her still and she was unable to breath because of it. I'm having a hard time with her death. She was such a sweet kitten and even though I can't admit it in front of her other three siblings she was my favorite. Can anyone explain this to me? Were the worms fighting the Strongid and migrating to her lungs making her unable to breathe? Did the KMR have something to do with it? I feel so bad. When I saw her throw up the worms Thursday night I told her to hang in there and I would get her all better in the morning after the vet wormed her but instead I feel like I killed her and did wrong by her. I am so sorry I did this to her and wish I could take it all back. She didn't deserve to die this way. Kim ...Saving just one pet won't change the worldbut surely the world will change for that one pet... The top ten reasons to spay and neuter your dog or cat were killed in a shelter today. ___ Felvtalk mailing list Felvtalk@felineleukemia.org http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org
Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night...
That was time... --- On Sat, 11/6/10, Kim kim_ferri...@embarqmail.com wrote: From: Kim kim_ferri...@embarqmail.com Subject: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night... To: felvtalk@felineleukemia.org Date: Saturday, November 6, 2010, 2:52 PM I am having such a hard time today with my kitten's death. My little kitten that was 2 months old died last night. She weighed 3/4 of a pound. She was the runt of the litter that I had raised since they were four weeks old. She has been a huge challenge for me the month I had her. My vet first thought she had mega esophagus but then wasn't so sure when she threw up roundworms. She had a problem keeping her food down since the very beginning. Anyway, Friday, my vet wormed her, and her three siblings. She was doing great yesterday until around 7 pm. I gave her a small bowl of KMR and shortly afterwards she started having difficulty breathing and was breathing through her mouth. She had eaten canned kitten food earlier and was doing fine. She died while I was holding her trying to give her a sub q injection. I don't know what I was thinking. I know I killed her. She couldn't breathe and I was trying to hold her still and evidently I had her in a position that her breathing worse because she just went limp and died in my hands. It was so fast that I didn't even get to give her any fluids. I knew she was having troubles breathing but yet I held her still and she was unable to breath because of it. I'm having a hard time with her death. She was such a sweet kitten and even though I can't admit it in front of her other three siblings she was my favorite. Can anyone explain this to me? Were the worms fighting the Strongid and migrating to her lungs making her unable to breathe? Did the KMR have something to do with it? I feel so bad. When I saw her throw up the worms Thursday night I told her to hang in there and I would get her all better in the morning after the vet wormed her but instead I feel like I killed her and did wrong by her. I am so sorry I did this to her and wish I could take it all back. She didn't deserve to die this way. Kim ...Saving just one pet won't change the worldbut surely the world will change for that one pet... The top ten reasons to spay and neuter your dog or cat were killed in a shelter today. ___ Felvtalk mailing list Felvtalk@felineleukemia.org http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org ___ Felvtalk mailing list Felvtalk@felineleukemia.org http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org
Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night...
Dear Kim, I am so sorry about your kitten's death! I'm sure that at one time or another, each one of us who has dealt with sick cats and kittens, takes the blame for their death. You did all you could! Your kitten seems to have had some serious health problems and was probably underweight because of them; at 2 months old, she should ideally have weighed almost 2 lbs. I would probably question whether the vet gave her the right dose of dewormer etc. Don't blame yourself...you did NOT kill the kitten! It's so natural for us to question ourselves when something goes wrong! I have just gone through a kitten death two weeks ago. A practically newborn kitten was found in a window-well filled with water after a heavy rain. Someone looked down and saw a tiny orange kitten - under water except for the head. A call went out to anyone who might have a nursing mother - I did and still do. The kitten was probably 4 days old by then...our kittens were already 4 weeks old and gigantic compared to this baby. The mother was very willing to accept little Puddles, but he showed no desire to suckI had to feed him with an eyedropper. All went well, but after 5 days, Puddles didn't want to drink as much KMR and started feeling cold, although I kept him in a small carrier on heated disks for warmth, and fed him every two hours except for 4 hrs at night. I took him to the vet, and as he examined him, Puddles died right then and there...his temperature was only 95.6!. I blamed myself for just about everything, but I know that I did what I could correctly...I have raised so many tiny kittens to adulthood, why not this one? Maybe Puddles never got to drink his mother's milk to get any colostrumswe'll never know. Natalie -Original Message- From: felvtalk-boun...@felineleukemia.org [mailto:felvtalk-boun...@felineleukemia.org] On Behalf Of Kim Sent: Saturday, November 06, 2010 2:53 PM To: felvtalk@felineleukemia.org Subject: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night... I am having such a hard time today with my kitten's death. My little kitten that was 2 months old died last night. She weighed 3/4 of a pound. She was the runt of the litter that I had raised since they were four weeks old. She has been a huge challenge for me the month I had her. My vet first thought she had mega esophagus but then wasn't so sure when she threw up roundworms. She had a problem keeping her food down since the very beginning. Anyway, Friday, my vet wormed her, and her three siblings. She was doing great yesterday until around 7 pm. I gave her a small bowl of KMR and shortly afterwards she started having difficulty breathing and was breathing through her mouth. She had eaten canned kitten food earlier and was doing fine. She died while I was holding her trying to give her a sub q injection. I don't know what I was thinking. I know I killed her. She couldn't breathe and I was trying to hold her still and evidently I had her in a position that her breathing worse because she just went limp and died in my hands. It was so fast that I didn't even get to give her any fluids. I knew she was having troubles breathing but yet I held her still and she was unable to breath because of it. I'm having a hard time with her death. She was such a sweet kitten and even though I can't admit it in front of her other three siblings she was my favorite. Can anyone explain this to me? Were the worms fighting the Strongid and migrating to her lungs making her unable to breathe? Did the KMR have something to do with it? I feel so bad. When I saw her throw up the worms Thursday night I told her to hang in there and I would get her all better in the morning after the vet wormed her but instead I feel like I killed her and did wrong by her. I am so sorry I did this to her and wish I could take it all back. She didn't deserve to die this way. Kim ...Saving just one pet won't change the worldbut surely the world will change for that one pet... The top ten reasons to spay and neuter your dog or cat were killed in a shelter today. ___ Felvtalk mailing list Felvtalk@felineleukemia.org http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org ___ Felvtalk mailing list Felvtalk@felineleukemia.org http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org
Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night...
Kim, you didn't kill her. You were trying to save her. 3/4 of a lb at 2 months is awfully small. She probably had failure to thrive syndrome. All we can do is try to help them the best we can. I have a kitten now I am assist feeding who just isn't growing. He sounds like he has severe nasal congestion. We are on our 3 abx and not seeing any improvement. But we keep trying. That's all any of us can do. You loved her and that's what counts. Sharyl --- On Sat, 11/6/10, Kim kim_ferri...@embarqmail.com wrote: From: Kim kim_ferri...@embarqmail.com Subject: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night... To: felvtalk@felineleukemia.org Date: Saturday, November 6, 2010, 2:52 PM I am having such a hard time today with my kitten's death. My little kitten that was 2 months old died last night. She weighed 3/4 of a pound. She was the runt of the litter that I had raised since they were four weeks old. She has been a huge challenge for me the month I had her. My vet first thought she had mega esophagus but then wasn't so sure when she threw up roundworms. She had a problem keeping her food down since the very beginning. Anyway, Friday, my vet wormed her, and her three siblings. She was doing great yesterday until around 7 pm. I gave her a small bowl of KMR and shortly afterwards she started having difficulty breathing and was breathing through her mouth. She had eaten canned kitten food earlier and was doing fine. She died while I was holding her trying to give her a sub q injection. I don't know what I was thinking. I know I killed her. She couldn't breathe and I was trying to hold her still and evidently I had her in a position that her breathing worse because she just went limp and died in my hands. It was so fast that I didn't even get to give her any fluids. I knew she was having troubles breathing but yet I held her still and she was unable to breath because of it. I'm having a hard time with her death. She was such a sweet kitten and even though I can't admit it in front of her other three siblings she was my favorite. Can anyone explain this to me? Were the worms fighting the Strongid and migrating to her lungs making her unable to breathe? Did the KMR have something to do with it? I feel so bad. When I saw her throw up the worms Thursday night I told her to hang in there and I would get her all better in the morning after the vet wormed her but instead I feel like I killed her and did wrong by her. I am so sorry I did this to her and wish I could take it all back. She didn't deserve to die this way. Kim ...Saving just one pet won't change the worldbut surely the world will change for that one pet... The top ten reasons to spay and neuter your dog or cat were killed in a shelter today. ___ Felvtalk mailing list Felvtalk@felineleukemia.org http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org ___ Felvtalk mailing list Felvtalk@felineleukemia.org http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org
Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night...
Kim, you did not kill your kitten. Your kitten was ill or had a congenital defect and simply was not destined to survive. You gave her love, warmth, security and a full belly. She was very lucky that you found her and she knew it on some level. Be good to yourself. Mourn your loss and take your time. You did your level best and even if you don't know that right now, all the rest of us do and we are hurting because of your pain. You aren't alone and I honor you for the help you gave her and continue to give to the other furbabies that you have now and that will undoubtedly come your way. Sally J. Nordstrom Ms. Sally Jo's Oversized Escorts 2629 N. Booth St. Milwaukee, WI 53212 Phone: (414) 687-2333 Fax: (414) 377-4777 e-mail: ms...@sbcglobal.net $1M insurance WA NY Certified GA Amber Light Permit Landstar approved GPS Equipped Passport - will run Canada References available upon request Member CERT (Community Emergency Response Team - Department of Homeland Security) --- On Sat, 11/6/10, Natalie at...@optonline.net wrote: From: Natalie at...@optonline.net Subject: Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night... To: felvtalk@felineleukemia.org Date: Saturday, November 6, 2010, 3:28 PM Dear Kim, I am so sorry about your kitten's death! I'm sure that at one time or another, each one of us who has dealt with sick cats and kittens, takes the blame for their death. You did all you could! Your kitten seems to have had some serious health problems and was probably underweight because of them; at 2 months old, she should ideally have weighed almost 2 lbs. I would probably question whether the vet gave her the right dose of dewormer etc. Don't blame yourself...you did NOT kill the kitten! It's so natural for us to question ourselves when something goes wrong! I have just gone through a kitten death two weeks ago. A practically newborn kitten was found in a window-well filled with water after a heavy rain. Someone looked down and saw a tiny orange kitten - under water except for the head. A call went out to anyone who might have a nursing mother - I did and still do. The kitten was probably 4 days old by then...our kittens were already 4 weeks old and gigantic compared to this baby. The mother was very willing to accept little Puddles, but he showed no desire to suckI had to feed him with an eyedropper. All went well, but after 5 days, Puddles didn't want to drink as much KMR and started feeling cold, although I kept him in a small carrier on heated disks for warmth, and fed him every two hours except for 4 hrs at night. I took him to the vet, and as he examined him, Puddles died right then and there...his temperature was only 95.6!. I blamed myself for just about everything, but I know that I did what I could correctly...I have raised so many tiny kittens to adulthood, why not this one? Maybe Puddles never got to drink his mother's milk to get any colostrumswe'll never know. Natalie -Original Message- From: felvtalk-boun...@felineleukemia.org [mailto:felvtalk-boun...@felineleukemia.org] On Behalf Of Kim Sent: Saturday, November 06, 2010 2:53 PM To: felvtalk@felineleukemia.org Subject: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night... I am having such a hard time today with my kitten's death. My little kitten that was 2 months old died last night. She weighed 3/4 of a pound. She was the runt of the litter that I had raised since they were four weeks old. She has been a huge challenge for me the month I had her. My vet first thought she had mega esophagus but then wasn't so sure when she threw up roundworms. She had a problem keeping her food down since the very beginning. Anyway, Friday, my vet wormed her, and her three siblings. She was doing great yesterday until around 7 pm. I gave her a small bowl of KMR and shortly afterwards she started having difficulty breathing and was breathing through her mouth. She had eaten canned kitten food earlier and was doing fine. She died while I was holding her trying to give her a sub q injection. I don't know what I was thinking. I know I killed her. She couldn't breathe and I was trying to hold her still and evidently I had her in a position that her breathing worse because she just went limp and died in my hands. It was so fast that I didn't even get to give her any fluids. I knew she was having troubles breathing but yet I held her still and she was unable to breath because of it. I'm having a hard time with her death. She was such a sweet kitten and even though I can't admit it in front of her other three siblings she was my favorite. Can anyone explain this to me? Were the worms fighting the Strongid and migrating to her lungs making her unable to breathe? Did the KMR have something to do with it? I feel so bad. When I saw her throw up the worms Thursday night I told her to hang in there and I would get her all better in the morning after the vet wormed her but instead I feel like I killed her and did
Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night...
Oh, Kim, I have been through this so many times and so many times I've said I killed my cat/tortoise/lizard/snake/whatever. You did not kill her. You did the best you could at the time with the information you had, and I am so sorry that you feel this way. It's normal to blame oneself but hindsight is 20/20; a cliche, I know, but so true. On St Patrick's Day my FeLV+ cat, Bridget, died at the vet. She was there to be spayed but never made it to the table - they put her under and she died. Horrible. But what was even more horrible was that I had a premonition that she would die during surgery, for weeks. A voice literally screamed in my head. DON'T DO IT, SHE WILL DIE. And yet I did it, and got that awful phone call from the vet. That night I posted on this forum - it's my fault, I killed her. I was so grateful for the assurances from other members that no, I didn't kill her.I tried my best and something happened. I am sure that many other folks will have a similar story. ___ Felvtalk mailing list Felvtalk@felineleukemia.org http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org
Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night...
Kim, it's a horrifying experience to go through. You are right, Laura, so many of us do have the same story and it just happened here - a mild URI, a sudden difficulty in breathing, emergency vet visit, then gone a few hrs later, but unlike your kitty, by himself with his brother as a witness.At 4 months, this was NOT normal. Kim, you were fighting something you couldn't see. But try to look at this in a different way - you loved her and you gave her your best because you loved her. I'm not sure sub-q'ing fluids when a kitten is struggling to breathe is the safest thing to do anyway, so maybe it was just time for her to pass. So Kim, she is lucky she left while you were holding her, no matter what position. You didn't kill her, whatever was ailing her killed her - you were trying to help her. Janine From: LauraM hingebacktorto...@yahoo.com To: felvtalk@felineleukemia.org Sent: Sat, November 6, 2010 6:43:25 PM Subject: Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night... Oh, Kim, I have been through this so many times and so many times I've said I killed my cat/tortoise/lizard/snake/whatever. You did not kill her. You did the best you could at the time with the information you had, and I am so sorry that you feel this way. It's normal to blame oneself but hindsight is 20/20; a cliche, I know, but so true. On St Patrick's Day my FeLV+ cat, Bridget, died at the vet. She was there to be spayed but never made it to the table - they put her under and she died. Horrible. But what was even more horrible was that I had a premonition that she would die during surgery, for weeks. A voice literally screamed in my head. DON'T DO IT, SHE WILL DIE. And yet I did it, and got that awful phone call from the vet. That night I posted on this forum - it's my fault, I killed her. I was so grateful for the assurances from other members that no, I didn't kill her.I tried my best and something happened. I am sure that many other folks will have a similar story. ___ Felvtalk mailing list Felvtalk@felineleukemia.org http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org ___ Felvtalk mailing list Felvtalk@felineleukemia.org http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org
Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night...
Hi Natalie, I've been doing this for 20 years now and this year has been my worst year ever. About 2 months ago, I removed a cat from the pound who just had 4 kittens the night before. The kittens weren't even 24 hours old yet and they were waiting in line to be pts. Well, 2 weeks after she was in my home she came down with a horrible URI and my vet assured me that the kittens would be protected by the mother's milk and they would not get it. Well, long story short, they got it. Then the mother cat decided to drown one in the water bowl and she deheaded the other one. After feeding the other 2 with a stomach tube and doing sub q fluids I had to take the last 2 of her kittens to be put to sleep because they kept fading. The mother cat is doing fine now though. This is only a small sample of my year with kittens. I was talking to my husband and we both feel like the kitten was given too much wormer. I doubt the kitten that only weighed 3/4 pound should have been given the same amount as her siblings who weighed 2 and 1/4 pounds. I can only go by what my vet tells me. I brought them all in to the vet's office when I first got them. My first guess was worms when the little kitten was throwing up. My vet tested the poop samples and they came back negative. Then I was told the little kitten who was throwing up had mega esophagus. I babied her for a month and had her in and out of the vet's office. Thursday night when I saw the roundworms being thrown up I felt like she would improve once wormed. This time I saw a different vet in the same office who agreed that she could be full of worms and that was causing her to throw up; might not be mega esophagus. The breathing problems only started Monday night, 5 days before I saw the worms being thrown up. I'm trying not to blame myself but I do feel like if the vet had wormed them all at four weeks old this would be a whole new story with a different ending. I do blame myself for not being more assertive in getting them wormed earlier. My vet doesn't like to worm animals if their poop samples don't show any signs of parasites. I've told them time and time again that animals can have normal samples but still have parasites. They just don't show up at the time of the testing. I also blame myself for not questioning my vet for not giving me an antibiotic to give at home when we were there on Monday night. She gave my kitten an antibiotic injection but nothing went home with me. When I was there on Friday getting them wormed I asked about the need for antibiotics (in case she had pneumonia) and she told me that she had forgotten to give me an antibiotic on Monday and remembered it after we had left the office. I don't know why my vet couldn't have called me and had me come back to get it. When I left the vet's office on Monday my vet told me that my kitten would most likely die that night. Well, she didn't, she actually improved and was playing and eating well and throwing up minimally. She had a bad day Thursday and after I saw the worms being thrown up I knew in my heart what her problem was all along. I had very high hopes of her improving after she was wormed but that didn't happen. It was her worst, last few hours ever. I am so sorry about your kitten, Puddles. I've raised the newborn orphans for 20 years now (it's what I do for the humane society here because no one else wants to put the time into them that's needed to keep them alive) and I've syringe fed them all with very good outcomes. I've lost only a handful and several have had FeLV or congenital problems or neurological disorders but have done well. I appreciate what you did for Puddles and I know Puddles did, too. Kim ...Saving just one pet won't change the worldbut surely the world will change for that one pet... The top ten reasons to spay and neuter your dog or cat were killed in a shelter today. -Original Message- From: felvtalk-boun...@felineleukemia.org [mailto:felvtalk-boun...@felineleukemia.org] On Behalf Of Natalie Sent: Saturday, November 06, 2010 4:29 PM To: felvtalk@felineleukemia.org Subject: Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night... Dear Kim, I am so sorry about your kitten's death! I'm sure that at one time or another, each one of us who has dealt with sick cats and kittens, takes the blame for their death. You did all you could! Your kitten seems to have had some serious health problems and was probably underweight because of them; at 2 months old, she should ideally have weighed almost 2 lbs. I would probably question whether the vet gave her the right dose of dewormer etc. Don't blame yourself...you did NOT kill the kitten! It's so natural for us to question ourselves when something goes wrong! I have just gone through a kitten death two weeks ago. A practically newborn kitten was found in a window-well filled with water after a heavy rain. Someone looked down and saw a tiny orange kitten - under water except for the head
Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night...
Sharyl, Thanks for the email. I've been doing better today telling myself I wasn't to blame but it still doesn't help much. I tend to be so hard on myself when one dies. I hope that your little kitten improves. Kim ...Saving just one pet won't change the worldbut surely the world will change for that one pet... The top ten reasons to spay and neuter your dog or cat were killed in a shelter today. -Original Message- From: felvtalk-boun...@felineleukemia.org [mailto:felvtalk-boun...@felineleukemia.org] On Behalf Of Sharyl Sent: Saturday, November 06, 2010 4:32 PM To: felvtalk@felineleukemia.org Subject: Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night... Kim, you didn't kill her. You were trying to save her. 3/4 of a lb at 2 months is awfully small. She probably had failure to thrive syndrome. All we can do is try to help them the best we can. I have a kitten now I am assist feeding who just isn't growing. He sounds like he has severe nasal congestion. We are on our 3 abx and not seeing any improvement. But we keep trying. That's all any of us can do. You loved her and that's what counts. Sharyl --- On Sat, 11/6/10, Kim kim_ferri...@embarqmail.com wrote: From: Kim kim_ferri...@embarqmail.com Subject: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night... To: felvtalk@felineleukemia.org Date: Saturday, November 6, 2010, 2:52 PM I am having such a hard time today with my kitten's death. My little kitten that was 2 months old died last night. She weighed 3/4 of a pound. She was the runt of the litter that I had raised since they were four weeks old. She has been a huge challenge for me the month I had her. My vet first thought she had mega esophagus but then wasn't so sure when she threw up roundworms. She had a problem keeping her food down since the very beginning. Anyway, Friday, my vet wormed her, and her three siblings. She was doing great yesterday until around 7 pm. I gave her a small bowl of KMR and shortly afterwards she started having difficulty breathing and was breathing through her mouth. She had eaten canned kitten food earlier and was doing fine. She died while I was holding her trying to give her a sub q injection. I don't know what I was thinking. I know I killed her. She couldn't breathe and I was trying to hold her still and evidently I had her in a position that her breathing worse because she just went limp and died in my hands. It was so fast that I didn't even get to give her any fluids. I knew she was having troubles breathing but yet I held her still and she was unable to breath because of it. I'm having a hard time with her death. She was such a sweet kitten and even though I can't admit it in front of her other three siblings she was my favorite. Can anyone explain this to me? Were the worms fighting the Strongid and migrating to her lungs making her unable to breathe? Did the KMR have something to do with it? I feel so bad. When I saw her throw up the worms Thursday night I told her to hang in there and I would get her all better in the morning after the vet wormed her but instead I feel like I killed her and did wrong by her. I am so sorry I did this to her and wish I could take it all back. She didn't deserve to die this way. Kim ...Saving just one pet won't change the worldbut surely the world will change for that one pet... The top ten reasons to spay and neuter your dog or cat were killed in a shelter today. ___ Felvtalk mailing list Felvtalk@felineleukemia.org http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org ___ Felvtalk mailing list Felvtalk@felineleukemia.org http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org ___ Felvtalk mailing list Felvtalk@felineleukemia.org http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org
Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night...
Thanks so much Sally. You are so right, she was loved and warm and I hope she had a full enough belly when she died. Lots die out in the cold, hungry and alone where no one loves them. Thanks for allowing me to remember and give myself credit for the good parts about her death. I appreciate your email. Kim ...Saving just one pet won't change the worldbut surely the world will change for that one pet... The top ten reasons to spay and neuter your dog or cat were killed in a shelter today. -Original Message- From: felvtalk-boun...@felineleukemia.org [mailto:felvtalk-boun...@felineleukemia.org] On Behalf Of SALLY NORDSTROM Sent: Saturday, November 06, 2010 6:05 PM To: felvtalk@felineleukemia.org Subject: Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night... Kim, you did not kill your kitten. Your kitten was ill or had a congenital defect and simply was not destined to survive. You gave her love, warmth, security and a full belly. She was very lucky that you found her and she knew it on some level. Be good to yourself. Mourn your loss and take your time. You did your level best and even if you don't know that right now, all the rest of us do and we are hurting because of your pain. You aren't alone and I honor you for the help you gave her and continue to give to the other furbabies that you have now and that will undoubtedly come your way. Sally J. Nordstrom Ms. Sally Jo's Oversized Escorts 2629 N. Booth St. Milwaukee, WI 53212 Phone: (414) 687-2333 Fax: (414) 377-4777 e-mail: ms...@sbcglobal.net $1M insurance WA NY Certified GA Amber Light Permit Landstar approved GPS Equipped Passport - will run Canada References available upon request Member CERT (Community Emergency Response Team - Department of Homeland Security) --- On Sat, 11/6/10, Natalie at...@optonline.net wrote: From: Natalie at...@optonline.net Subject: Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night... To: felvtalk@felineleukemia.org Date: Saturday, November 6, 2010, 3:28 PM Dear Kim, I am so sorry about your kitten's death! I'm sure that at one time or another, each one of us who has dealt with sick cats and kittens, takes the blame for their death. You did all you could! Your kitten seems to have had some serious health problems and was probably underweight because of them; at 2 months old, she should ideally have weighed almost 2 lbs. I would probably question whether the vet gave her the right dose of dewormer etc. Don't blame yourself...you did NOT kill the kitten! It's so natural for us to question ourselves when something goes wrong! I have just gone through a kitten death two weeks ago. A practically newborn kitten was found in a window-well filled with water after a heavy rain. Someone looked down and saw a tiny orange kitten - under water except for the head. A call went out to anyone who might have a nursing mother - I did and still do. The kitten was probably 4 days old by then...our kittens were already 4 weeks old and gigantic compared to this baby. The mother was very willing to accept little Puddles, but he showed no desire to suckI had to feed him with an eyedropper. All went well, but after 5 days, Puddles didn't want to drink as much KMR and started feeling cold, although I kept him in a small carrier on heated disks for warmth, and fed him every two hours except for 4 hrs at night. I took him to the vet, and as he examined him, Puddles died right then and there...his temperature was only 95.6!. I blamed myself for just about everything, but I know that I did what I could correctly...I have raised so many tiny kittens to adulthood, why not this one? Maybe Puddles never got to drink his mother's milk to get any colostrumswe'll never know. Natalie -Original Message- From: felvtalk-boun...@felineleukemia.org [mailto:felvtalk-boun...@felineleukemia.org] On Behalf Of Kim Sent: Saturday, November 06, 2010 2:53 PM To: felvtalk@felineleukemia.org Subject: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night... I am having such a hard time today with my kitten's death. My little kitten that was 2 months old died last night. She weighed 3/4 of a pound. She was the runt of the litter that I had raised since they were four weeks old. She has been a huge challenge for me the month I had her. My vet first thought she had mega esophagus but then wasn't so sure when she threw up roundworms. She had a problem keeping her food down since the very beginning. Anyway, Friday, my vet wormed her, and her three siblings. She was doing great yesterday until around 7 pm. I gave her a small bowl of KMR and shortly afterwards she started having difficulty breathing and was breathing through her mouth. She had eaten canned kitten food earlier and was doing fine. She died while I was holding her trying to give her a sub q injection. I don't know what I was thinking. I know I killed her. She couldn't breathe and I was trying to hold her still and evidently I had her in a position that her
Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night...
Laura, I am so sorry to read about your FeLV cat, Bridget's death. I agree with everyone else; it wasn't your fault that she died. I think I'm going to keep telling myself what people around you told you. I tried my best, and something happened. I cried all day up until about an hour ago. It wasn't going to bring her back and it wasn't helping me or the other kittens I need to take care of. It is so hard to walk into the kitten room and see the other three kittens looking around for their sister. I had to keep them separated because the other three played too rough with her but I'd take her in their several times a day and allow supervised play time. I let them see her body and they smelled her and curled up with her for a while. I wonder if they understand. My husband is going to burry her tomorrow. Kim ...Saving just one pet won't change the worldbut surely the world will change for that one pet... The top ten reasons to spay and neuter your dog or cat were killed in a shelter today. -Original Message- From: felvtalk-boun...@felineleukemia.org [mailto:felvtalk-boun...@felineleukemia.org] On Behalf Of LauraM Sent: Saturday, November 06, 2010 6:43 PM To: felvtalk@felineleukemia.org Subject: Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night... Oh, Kim, I have been through this so many times and so many times I've said I killed my cat/tortoise/lizard/snake/whatever. You did not kill her. You did the best you could at the time with the information you had, and I am so sorry that you feel this way. It's normal to blame oneself but hindsight is 20/20; a cliche, I know, but so true. On St Patrick's Day my FeLV+ cat, Bridget, died at the vet. She was there to be spayed but never made it to the table - they put her under and she died. Horrible. But what was even more horrible was that I had a premonition that she would die during surgery, for weeks. A voice literally screamed in my head. DON'T DO IT, SHE WILL DIE. And yet I did it, and got that awful phone call from the vet. That night I posted on this forum - it's my fault, I killed her. I was so grateful for the assurances from other members that no, I didn't kill her.I tried my best and something happened. I am sure that many other folks will have a similar story. ___ Felvtalk mailing list Felvtalk@felineleukemia.org http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org ___ Felvtalk mailing list Felvtalk@felineleukemia.org http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org
Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night...
Janine, I am so sorry about your URI kitties death, too. I questioned the sub q fluids too, however, after I called the emergency vet and spoke to them I was doing what my vet told me to do. If I had it to do all over again I would not have even attempted it. The comfort I take in it is that I didn't get any fluids into her so I didn't kill her that way. However, she died while I was trying and that is what upsets me so much. I have a lot of issues concerning my vet with this kitten. I feel like both vets that saw my kitten felt as though she would not make it so they didn't really try to help me help her. I hate feeling as though I need to blame someone for the kitten's death but I do. I did things I knew not to do but did them anyway because I was told to so I cannot help but blame myself. However, I feel like my vets should have done more a month ago when I first took my kittens to them so I blame my two vets also. Plus, I think the last week was a total fiasco where my vet was concerned; forgetting to give me the antibiotics and worming too late and possibly giving to much Strongid to the one who died. I can live with myself tonight because my kitten was having trouble breathing before I tried to sub q her so I know I didn't cause the breathing problems. She was at her sickest point ever before I killed her and possibly wouldn't have made it anyway. However, I will never know now. She didn't die on her own accord; she died because I placed her in a position to where she was unable to breathe. Therefore, I didn't give her a fighting chance. I have to live with this. Kim ...Saving just one pet won't change the worldbut surely the world will change for that one pet... The top ten reasons to spay and neuter your dog or cat were killed in a shelter today. -Original Message- From: felvtalk-boun...@felineleukemia.org [mailto:felvtalk-boun...@felineleukemia.org] On Behalf Of janine paton Sent: Saturday, November 06, 2010 7:16 PM To: felvtalk@felineleukemia.org Subject: Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night... Kim, it's a horrifying experience to go through. You are right, Laura, so many of us do have the same story and it just happened here - a mild URI, a sudden difficulty in breathing, emergency vet visit, then gone a few hrs later, but unlike your kitty, by himself with his brother as a witness.At 4 months, this was NOT normal. Kim, you were fighting something you couldn't see. But try to look at this in a different way - you loved her and you gave her your best because you loved her. I'm not sure sub-q'ing fluids when a kitten is struggling to breathe is the safest thing to do anyway, so maybe it was just time for her to pass. So Kim, she is lucky she left while you were holding her, no matter what position. You didn't kill her, whatever was ailing her killed her - you were trying to help her. Janine From: LauraM hingebacktorto...@yahoo.com To: felvtalk@felineleukemia.org Sent: Sat, November 6, 2010 6:43:25 PM Subject: Re: [Felvtalk] I killed my kitten last night... Oh, Kim, I have been through this so many times and so many times I've said I killed my cat/tortoise/lizard/snake/whatever. You did not kill her. You did the best you could at the time with the information you had, and I am so sorry that you feel this way. It's normal to blame oneself but hindsight is 20/20; a cliche, I know, but so true. On St Patrick's Day my FeLV+ cat, Bridget, died at the vet. She was there to be spayed but never made it to the table - they put her under and she died. Horrible. But what was even more horrible was that I had a premonition that she would die during surgery, for weeks. A voice literally screamed in my head. DON'T DO IT, SHE WILL DIE. And yet I did it, and got that awful phone call from the vet. That night I posted on this forum - it's my fault, I killed her. I was so grateful for the assurances from other members that no, I didn't kill her.I tried my best and something happened. I am sure that many other folks will have a similar story. ___ Felvtalk mailing list Felvtalk@felineleukemia.org http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org ___ Felvtalk mailing list Felvtalk@felineleukemia.org http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org ___ Felvtalk mailing list Felvtalk@felineleukemia.org http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org
