Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention Depressions has evolved into rage. Momentary bouts of it mind you, but rage all it's own. I'm trying my best. But it's never enough.In the words of Ivan Moody:"It's never enough. No, it's never enough. No matter what I say. It's never enough, no it's never enough. No matter what I try to be. It's never enough, no it's never enough, no never enough. I'll never be what you want me to be. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=270644#p270644 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention Hi again ghost rider. one thing is you can do is join both the thumbs and close your ears join the index and put on your eyes and all remaning fingers should be put on the forhead and try to say "om sustains the o sounds and when the breathing is out of control sustain mm. and don't think about anything at this time. you will be GTG. ThanksIshan URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=267460#p267460 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention concentration! I will appreciate Mister dark's post regarding the matter of cracking a joke. if someone feel offensive what I can do I can still apologise so Mister dark lord! apologies! While at ghost rider I personally don't love online girls no matter where she meets you and where she calls you rather I carefully play the game with them to prevent a scam. well tell me do you find any punctuation mistake in her post? When you talk do you still find that she is mimicking the accent? these are few things which firstly should be looked. Now as I see a lover in you. firstly what is love accordint to you? because I guarantee that people has misconception regarding love. a ninth and tenth class girls also usually says that she is broken hearted. same thing applies with boys in my city. If you feel offensive to that joke please I feel sorry for that because of the moderation and any othe r rules. The only medication is which I know that the book which I am talking about. The book will heal up all of your wounds ThanksIshan URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=267456#p267456 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention Moderation! Ishen, while I appreciate that in the start of your post you were trying to be humourus, making jokes about death and ghosts around someone feeling as Ghost rider is is an extremely! bad thing to do. Encouragement is appreciated, but remember that people don't write messages like Ghostrider's to be funny, and that what you say matters, and this is not a time for jokes on those sorts of subjects. Consider this an official warning. @Ghostrider, there's not much I can say since yes, I've been there, but saying "well it'll get better" probably won't help you right now since I'm guessing your in a position where you canot perceive any difference to your current situation. Therefore try to take care of yourself, practice some perciveerence, like Frodo plodding through mordor, then when you are feeling less bleaque in a while, consider how you can help things in the future, what you can do when you r feeling like this and how best to cope.You cannot change your circumstances, or what you feel, but you can attempt to live with it and master itand change what you do about it so that you don't hurt yourself or anyone around you. One tactic which does help is trying to separate yourself from these perceptions. When you start to think "I'm worthless" or "I'm useless" try to recognize that these are not real or true or accurate judgements, anymore than the judgements of a very prejudiced person are accurate, think of them as "your shadow" or "your enemy" or whatever way you find useful to separate yourself from them, so that you are in control of what you feel not the other way around. Also feel free to come and have a good vent, if this forum and this community can't really help with much else, we can at least help by being there while you get out what your feeling.Take care of yourself, your wor th it even if some parts of yourself don't recognize that. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=267452#p267452 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention Everybody has hardships.It doesn't change the fact that those hardships are hard for those people. I had a really hard break-up when I was like 15. It was bad for me then, because I felt almost exactly how you feel now. The details of the event aren't important. What is important is that I'm still here today, engaged to a wonderful woman, and life is good. There's tons of shit out there int he world that sucks, but there's even more that's awesome. You just have to find it.I know this information doesn't seem like much, but I wish someone had told me back then that I'd end up where I am now. I probably wouldn't have believed them now that I think about it. Anyhoo, I found that I could drown my pain in anime and reading. Worked pretty well, and I learned that I don't need someone else to live for. Not when I can just live for myself, though it is nice to know that you are the world to someone else. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=267441#p267441 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention Hi ghost rider! how can you die if you are a ghost? a ghost is without his or her body man! hahaha that I said because I want to give you laughter. so there is a phrase in my hindi zindagi lambi nahi badi honi chaiye. that means a life should not be long it should be big. see. see yourself my brother see yourself!who you are? what is your moto? ask yourself I have a good exercise for you. close your eyes and just concentrate on your thoughts and focuss it it may be good and bad but still focuss it then analyse it again. If Mr dark allows me I have a perfect medication for you. What medication? a book a spiritual book. a spiritual book which I accidently found and If you want and Mr dark allows I will post it here. don't give up My champion ! also don't forget to listen inspirational wings I will give it you. You are the special one. W hat you can Do others will not. what you have others don't have. If others have then maybe it will be more than you and less than. look another example. a tree which stand still if a cutter cuts its stump then the tree don't cry but heal itself and regenerate itself Now it is time to regenerate yourself man! ThanksIshan URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=267415#p267415 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention Hello,The best advice I can give you at the moment is not to find a girlfriend anytime soon. Heal a bit, try again maybe 3 4 years later. Forget about this. I know it's hard but is the only way to move on. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=267385#p267385 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention I don't know what the point is anymore. I try and I fail. I fight and I lose. I hope and I'm crushed. Is there really even a point to going onward anymore? I tried to make it work with a girl I thought loved me. She lied. I tried to move on. I failed and so did the relationship. The girl I love hates me now. I'm without hope. Without pain, without pleasure... without feeling. I feel worthless. I feel like a speck of dust, like the gum on the bottom of someone's shoe... condemned to being crushed into the pavement until I'm scraped off and thrown down the garbage. I feel like the third wheel, the accident, that one annoying itch you can never quite scratch. My hope is gone. I guess it always has been but I'm just realizing it now. I'm a shadow of me. I'm nothing more than that. My happiness never lasts. My hopes, my dreams seem to never come to pass. My worth is questionable, no, nonexistent. I may sound like I'm just laying here, feeling sorry for myself. No. It's beyond that. It's pure, utter hopelessness that cannot be fixed. It's numbing pain. It's a sick, warped pleasure, because at least I can feel something. It's feeling so weak I can't move. I don't want to move. I don't want to go on... I don't want this anymore... URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=267377#p267377 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention @Ghost rider, glad your doing okay and things are hopefully not too dire. @Ggf, I agree with Turtlepower here. From what Ghostrider has already said in this topic I don't think abuse is the issue exactly, although abuse is a difficult thing to quantify at the best of times and often only visible with hindsight. Still, it's not good to start jumping to rash conclusions or recommending actions without full information which is why I suggested earlier that Ghostrider see about talking to someone not involved in the situation, eg, a doctor or other professional. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=256832#p256832 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention it does seem like quite a leap to assume that actual abuse is going on. From what ghost Rider has said, it doesn't sound as though this is the case, although of course I could be wrong. As someone else rightly pointed out, we don't know all sides of the story, so encouraging someone to run away from a situation with so few and sketchy details available is ill-advised at best. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=256695#p256695 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention How are you feeling most of the time? Has your relationship with your family improved? URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=256684#p256684 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention I'm doing alright. She's in Europe for a while so I'm just kinda here... URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=256660#p256660 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention Hi GhostRider. Hope that you're doing well...I know it may feel that you have no one, but you don't; you have a lot of forum members rooting for you, backing you up, and (hopefully, if they're religious) praying for you.Feel free to send me an email if you need someone to talk to. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=256655#p256655 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention We don't know the whole story, so I'm not going to say whether or not it could be considered family abuse. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=256582#p256582 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
2016-04-09
Thread
AudioGames . net Forum — Off-topic room : Green Gables Fan via Audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention I actually have a friend who has gone through family abuse. She was fortunate to move out of that hellish situation and couch hop at some of her friend's houses. Then she sought permanent housing with her band members, where she currently resides. If your family is truly being abusive, you have the right to run away to seek homeless helter. Do not be afraid to speak up, even if you think others won't listen to you. Try to get a mandated reporter to tape evidence of the abuse.Hope this helps. :-) URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=256549#p256549 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention I realise that not many people have commented here recently, but I think that it is an important issue that should not be dismissed, hence I would like to ask how things are going at the moment for ghost rider. Depending on certain factors, my views on this issue may differ from what other people have said, and ghost rider has failed to provide some key details in us helping with this issue; thus, I am not going to explicitly state my thoughts as I am not a person who specialises in this area, and I would be quite alarmed for ghost rider to suffer because of my advice. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=256472#p256472 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention I realise that not many people have commented here recently, but I think that it is an important issue that should not be dismissed, hence I would like to ask how things are going at the moment for ghost rider. Depending on certain factors, my views on this issue may differ from what other people have said; thus, I am not going to explicitly state my thoughts as I am not a person who specialises in this area, and I would be quite alarmed for ghost rider to suffer because of my advice. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=256472#p256472 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention @Ghostrider, I'm sorry this has happened again, but the fact you recognize it is a cycle should tell you there is something that needs to be done here as was suggested earlier. Remember the old joke, it only takes one psychologist to change a lightbulb but the lightbulb has to want to change.I'm not suggesting you don't, but it is true that unless you try to change some of the things you can or find better ways to cope, nothing will change. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=252924#p252924 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention It appears as though the cycle has began again... I cannot seem to find happiness in anything. And if I do, it is but fleeting... I've no one... I've no one... or so it feels... URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=252903#p252903 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention Perhaps it's to show Ghost Rider's feelings.@ghost rider: I've been following the topic but I've not posted because I honestly don't know if I can offer any advice, because I'm worried if I try to do that, it might just make things worse for you and I don't want to do that. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=249942#p249942 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention I know how you feel, Aaron. When I first saw this thread, I wasn't sure if I should post... But I realized I had to offer my support (and a bit of advice) to Ghostrider; I've been depressed, and I knew how Ghostrider might feel. Of course, I haven't been in a relationship with someone online, but I have been very depressed before. That's something I'm still going through, but I'm determined to overcome it. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=249946#p249946 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
2016-02-09
Thread
AudioGames . net Forum — Off-topic room : severestormsteve1 via Audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention who wrote that? URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=249840#p249840 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention Bring Me The Horizon wrote it. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=249883#p249883 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
2016-02-09
Thread
AudioGames . net Forum — Off-topic room : severestormsteve1 via Audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention Ah. Why did you share it? URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=249887#p249887 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention Cut off my wings and come lock me upJust pull the plug yeah, I've had enoughTear me to pieces, sell me for partsYou're all vampires so hereYou can have my heartYou can have my heartYou can have my heartThe world's a funeral, a room of ghostsNo hint of movement, no sign of pulseOnly an echo, just skin and boneThey kick the chair but we, we help tie the ropeYou can have my heartYou can have my heartYou can have my heartSo come rain on my parade'Cause I wanna feel itCome shove me over the edge'Cause my head is in overdriveI'm sorry, but it's too lateAnd it's not worth savingSo come rain on my paradeI think we're doomedI think we're doomedAnd now there is no way backYou must've made some kind of mistakeI asked for death, but instead I'm awakeThe devil told me "No room for cheats"I thought I sold my soul, but he kept the receiptSo leave the light on, I'm coming homeIt's getting darker, but I'll carry onThe sun don't shine, but it never didAnd when it rains, it fucking poursBut I think I like itAnd you know that I'm in love with the messI think I like itSo come rain on my parade'Cause I wanna feel itCome shove me over the edge'Cause my head is in overdriveI'm sorry, but it's too lateAnd it's not worth savingSo come rain on my paradeI think we're doomedI think we're doomedAnd now there is no way backI think we're doomedI think we're doomedAnd now there is no way backSo come rain on my parade'Cause I wanna feel itCome shove me over the edge'Cause my head is in overdriveI'm sorry, but it's too lateAnd it's not worth savingSo come rain on my paradeI think we're doomedI think we're doomedAnd now there is no way back URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=249796#p249796 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention I have to make something quite clear: I have heard her actual voice. Our relationship is not strictly RP. We've Skyped and talked on the phone for countless hours, and we both have XBOX so when I can sneak on and talk to her I do. I respect your warnings and I keep them in mind... Thank you. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=248611#p248611 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention GhostRider,I do applaud you for being strong, even through the face of everything you're going through. Granted I don't know the whole story, I just happened to stumble upon this topic through some fluke. I do want to point out some things, however.The previous poster has some amazingly good points. If this relationship is strictly RP and you guys haven't ever met, then there's a huge gap. I was in your shoes once, too. I met someone online and thought he was the best thing in the world, through RP sessions. I made the mistake of not telling my family. They found out anyway and it was a terrible time. Relationships need a face-to-face aspect. You can date long-distance, I did it, but I still saw the person I was dating face to face and actually got to touch them and talk with them and hear the voice they were given and not some robotic synthesizer.It may seem hard to believe, but as the previous poster pointed out, not everyone is who they say they are. As my sociology professor says, "People lie."I'm not the best on advice, but I can offer you this. It seems like you're in a stage of your life where you're not sure what you want, and it just seems like the end. Perhaps you should invest in professional help or find activities that make you happy to keep your mind from wandering to such unpleasant things.If you ever need an ear, I'm around and will be happy to listen and offer what I can. ML URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=248508#p248508 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention Dark is absolutely correct. Take that determination and do something practical with it. You can overcome this, Ghostrider! I am certan of it! I'm rooting for you; you can do this! I'll be praying! URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=248069#p248069 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention Ok, I'm probably going to get flamed for this, but I'm putting it out anyway. I'll also say that I have had some experiences where a person I've met online dooped me into believing she was one person, when in reality she was playing a character and a sick game, married with three kids the whole timeYou say that you can see yourself holding her, kissing her. How is this possible only via text, and seeing as you've never met in person. From looking at both your and her twitter accounts, that's all I see is textual things, or RP. Granted there could be things not posted and I'm missing things because of this. I've also been in the situation where strict parents played a part, both on my end and the girl's end. I have also had successful relationships that just in the end didn't work out, but had good times with the person. What I'm seeing from my point of view here is all RP, and no real face-to-face interaction. If you do n't get help with that, you'll only draw yourself deeper into sadness and depression.As I said, I could be wrong on all this, and you could have a great relationship, and your parents are just being the ones in your way. But I think they could also have valid points and are trying to make you not fall into the same trap I fell into. Either way, you need to make something happen to either show your family she's real and the fact you have a great thing going, or go along with your parents, and get the help you may need. But only having a relationship based on role play is not good because it puts you in situations that you're in now. If you both agree to talk to each others families, then you can take the steps to meet in person. But until you do that, or find out the truth, you're going to keep falling into this trap and depression. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=248085#p248085 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention It's back. I'm falling back into that pit with no sign of escape. I'm lying here, imagining I can feel her hair in my face and her warmth on top of me, I'm imagining I can feel her kissing me and it makes it worse. I just want to hold her... Or cut everything short... URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=247988#p247988 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention You know how they say, "Happy new years?" Well I'm not having one... so yeah... I still miss her. I have very little energy. I'm only moving my arms and my head. Haven't tried to get up all day. I don't want to eat... hardly want to breathe... URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=245060#p245060 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention I agree with Nocturnus; I'm rooting and praying for you as well. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=244661#p244661 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention I do agree with you there, Dark. I shouldn't fly off the handle with them like that. I have terrible anger issues and things like this, even though they have nothing to do with me, still make me angry beyond belief. And usually when I get mad, I speak the first thing that comes to my mind, usually being etc etc etc you can't do this etc etc etc I'll move out. I shouldn't be like that, but it's my over all personality. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=244198#p244198 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention @ghostrider I find it almost near impossible to reply to such a profound statement, and yet, I feel I must. It is my hope and prayer that you will gleam something from it that will sustain you if only a little longer, since every moment you have committed yourself to life is yet another intense battle won in a grueling war, and make no mistake; you've done well. From your admission that you fall into seemingly endless pits and don't know what to do or how to do it, to your embracing the hurt and the anger and distress you have coped with thus far, shouldering it as best you know how without knowing how, struggling under the burden of it all to fight another day is nothing short of heroic. Consider your age, your abilities, your place in life and in this world. Then, consider that others who would claim they are much older, much wiser, much more solidly ground and mentally sound have succumb to the end. Regardless what we make of it, ri ght or wrong, good or bad, heartless or otherwise, the choice to continue living, to resist the call to call it quits because your life seems to have spun out of your control and dealing with it in complete doubt no longer seems like a solution, your heart continues beating, your pulse continues channeling, your mind continues turning, and while you may not see it, your love continues growing.If you haven't heard it today, if you've never heard it in your life, then let me be the first to say to you that I'm proud of you, proud of what you've accomplished, which is more than I did when I was somewhat in your shoes. I didn't speak. I didn't want to admit I was afraid. I didn't wish to hold onto anyone or seem dependant. I fled from all of that and chose to dwell in the darkest of places where many horrid calamities present themselves, where the conclusion seems to be the end of all stories. I would dwell in my min d, and there was no escape.And in this self pity I wallowed for far too long, without anyone caring because no soul knew, and no soul knew because I would not reveal, not befriend, not attempt at any point to venture forth to do anything about and or with myself. I lay in bed and wished for the end, my mother and father both coming to my door and trying to offer me meals, my sister doing her best to encourage me in her own little way by trying to be first helpful, then comical, then helpful again. I discovered the difference between living and merely existing as a shell, a wreck of a person, an entity rather than an individual with individualistic traits and ideas and a personality.But you? You have done more than I have. People call my posts eloquent; they say my speech is worth their attention. I placed a mask over myself when I spoke to anyone on here or anywhere else my presence was required. I went on performing like nothing had e ver taken place in my life that would warrant sadness or fear or anything else that could be interpreted as negativity, all the while hurting myself, ignoring my frame of mind, a stringless dummy capable of bursting into flames and disintegrating and perishing into the wells of silence. Were I to return to my past self I would tell myself to do what you've done, and that admission on my part is the highest praise and greatest acknowledgement I can give you. it may not mean anything to you now, and it may never mean anything to you at all, ever, but I want you to know that I'm rooting for you, the two of you and your relationship. I'm going to keep cheering you on and believing in you because that along with my prayers truly is all I have to offer, knowing that no amount of what I am doing may bring you true solace while simultaneously wishing and waiting for a day when you come back to us and tell us you made it, because I care, and I'm sure man y others do too. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=243725#p243725 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention I lie here fighting the uncontrollable urge to cry... I'd give anything to hold my love right now. Nothing sexual, just lie here and hold her and never let go... If only I could look into her eyes... I... I can't live without her. I've tried and it doesn't work or last... URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=243676#p243676 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention @Ghostrider, that's not good. I definitely think you need to do something about your feelings sinse the sort of thing you describe is beyond what is considered "normal" levels of depression, ie, it's getting to the point of really affecting the things you do in your life and putting you at risk of physical harm. As I said previously, dealing with emotions and dealing with the circumstances that cause those emotions are two different things. I'd definitely suggest you seak some assistance with this from your Doctor. Think of it this way, if you were really stressed and the stress caused bad stomach acid which gave you a severely upset stomach, you'd do something about your stomach, ie, take some antacids as well as try to do something about your stress. This is one of those occasions where I think a campaign on both fronts is in order. For something minimal to do, I would suggest trying to mentally separate yourself from what you are feeling. Say "okay I feel like that, but just because that is how I feel that isn't necessarily the truth" and then, as I've said before, find ways to cope with the times this happens.@Garret, I take your point, but with respect situations are rarely as simple as you describe, and just as it'd be wrong to simply obey parents without question, it'd be equally bad to fly off the handle as you put it.This is a circumstance where calm, rational discourse is needed, perhaps if no compromise is necessary then! is the point to start talk about moving out etc, however hopefuly if everyone is reasonable things shouldn't get to that sort of pass.I suspect Ghost rider's ability to hve that sort of rational discussion, explain what he feels to his parents and try to sort things out reasonably is affected by what he's feeling, which is why I'd suggest talking to a Doctor, indeed it might even be possible that his pare nts have taken this over protective stance precisely because! he is prone to depression and so they fear him coming to harm through some irrational action. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=243003#p243003 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention @Ghostrider, Gelman has posted on this subject before, to be honest I don't think his views are really about "you!" specifically, he just saw something about suicide and wanted to ride off on his righteous hobby horse, hence the moderation warning and request to decist. I'd have said the same if he'd posted a huge long religious sermon on the "Sin" of suicide, indeed as I said I remember once having to ban a member for that very thing. There is a huge difference between theory and practice in ethics, indeed in one ethical lecture I was in on the subject of euthanasia, the lecturer (a very vile woman who hated anyone with a y Chromosome), actually said after delivering a similar polemic "Of course don't say! this to anyone who's really thinking about suicide?" She was quite shocked when I stood up and admited that I'd been in the position of considering suicide myself at one time and found her views far too si mplistic.Then again, she was not a nice person at all (we used to refer to her as Satan's mother), (even towards women, and let alone if you were male). Btw Ghost rider, how are things with you currently? I gather not good, which is a shame. Feel free to post us an update as to how your doing, sinse at least saying how your feeling is better than not doing so and hopefully on this forum you can say whatever you want.@Turtlepower, your understanding is appreciated, but as I said, in this case it's not really about "owning this corner of the web", actually I don't own the forum, I am just responsable for people's safety. The fact here is that Ghostrider has presented a topic where he explains the bad situation he's in currently. Firstly, I'd be pretty much a scumbag if I didn't try to help at least by listening, and even more so if I actively let something harmful occur, eg, insensative ranting of one sort o r another. Secondly, I do! actually feel slightly responsable for member's safety and wellbeing here, sinse even though this is obviously a forum about games, it's also supposed to be a decent and welcoming community, hence why the only time that rules tend to get inforced is to avoid unpleasantness of one sort or another, and Ghostrider's circumstances definitely qualify as "unpleasant" . I suggest now however that we drop the subject of the discussion of suicide or self harm in general, zealous, theoretical terms, and move back to the much more personal circumstances Ghostrider mentions here. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=242831#p242831 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention I had improved but after to much time to think and insecurity I fell right back into my depression. It's not as terrible as before yet but I... I find myself... I don't know. I'm not afraid of death honestly... I welcome it by now. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=242921#p242921 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention In a burst of anger not long ago I tried clawing my eyes out... I was so close to ending it... URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=242926#p242926 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention Well, I could go into a long thing about this, but I think I'll keep this short and simple. I want you to know that I am not telling you to disrespect your parents, I'm just going to tell you what I would do. Personally, if mom or dad tried to keep me from going out with my own girl, I'd probably say. "You will either let me go out with her, or I will not go to school. It doesn't matter to me if you take my computer or not. If you keep on with me, I will move out of this house and you will not have me anymore. It's people like you guys that want me want to move out of this hellhole." Now hear me out here guys. I am not telling ghost rider to say this stuff, I'm just informing him of what I would do. And to be honest with you, I love my parents. But if they said that I couldn't date my true love, then I would not hesitate to fly off the handle with them. My opinion is, no matter how old you are you can date who ever the hell you want to. Your parents have no control over that. And I'm not joking about moving out, I would not hesitate to leave my parents out in the dirt. I can be a very mean person when I want to be. Again, I wouldn't incourage everyone to relentlessly disrespect your parents, but I am the kind of person that would. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=242938#p242938 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention At Garrett, I agree with the gist of your point, but reacting with bitterness and anger would only prove to your parents that you're as immature and untrustworthy as they say you are. So a better solution is to bide your time. Be compliant so that they think you're obeying them, even if you're doing stuff they wouldn't approve of on the sly. I know most people wouldn't approve of this advice either, but I wish I had been more successful at pulling that off when I was in a relationship my parents disapproved of. it was an interracial relationship, and they flat out refused to accept it. In fact, I don't think they'll ever forgive me for it, no matter how long ago it happened. The point is, if I'd just kept it quiet, and used the love I had for my ex as a factor to drive me towards a different life, a life I could build on my own, things might have turned out very, very differently for me. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=242969#p242969 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
2015-12-15
Thread
AudioGames . net Forum — Off-topic room : severestormsteve1 via Audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention Hi Ghost Rider, you love Erowyn, right? Well consider this, man. Every time you hit that brink, just think about her, and remember that hope cannot be lost. She wouldn't want you to do that. And if you take your life, you won't get to be with her. Even when life gets hard, ya gotta keep going. Because I promise you, that after the hardships you're experiencing now, the reward for your pushing through and being brave will be completely worth while. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=242956#p242956 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention Moderation! Just in case you read this Gelman, the "Rule" here you were violating is treating other members with respect and consideration. It's not your view that is the issue, it's your stark _expression_ of that view here in a context in which _expression_ of that view could be harmful to another forum member, as I said, feel free to discuss this elsewhere however you desire.Whatever else, suicide is not something to be undertaken lightly, and the last thing someone in that situation needs is a moral castigation either for or against, indeed it is extremely insensative to do so.If you want to leve the forum, that's your choice, though I don't really see what that has to do with deleting your profile anyway. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=242677#p242677 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention Hello folks. The Ghost Rider, I feel a coward for not coming earlier to offer you a supporting hand dude.In some extent, I can at least imagine your pain.But the thing is, if she really loves you, as much as you love her, she will surely support you and wait for the right moment for you two to be together. Hold on to this, and use your feelings for her to as an extra fuel to keep you going. If you like to play music, use this as an inspiration for your creations. If you prefer writing, go and make your own world, make your ideas into characters, then face them, make them better, try to understand their reasons.I used to transform my issues into characters and sort of put them to use on tabletop rpg matches, to see if I can deal with them in a more introspective way.I could tell you about a really large amount of things with this topic, but it wont be as accurately as what I'm trying to show you. Again, I'm sorry, I'm really sorry for watching all this from a distance so far. I know I barely know you, and the majority of our fellow audiogamers, but I tend to care about other people. This being said, and now I may sound a bit contraditory... Perhaps you should try to see the whole thing from another point of view. It is always worst when we are in the eye of the storm, but try to retreat for a moment, and maybe you can see from a far, that there is a haven you couldn't see earlier when you were there due to the gray nature of the situation.Best regards, Haramir. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=242676#p242676 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention @DarkI havent' knowingly violated any explicit rule of which I am aware, and I frankly don't perceive how *conditional* moral reinforcement of a voluntary and legal act can constitute a violation of the Forum rules but I respect that you have the final say.That being said, I am no longer interested in further participation in this forum, so I kindly request that you delete my profile.Normally I would not reply to a moderation in the same thread, but since this is my final words in this forum I hope it's appropriate that I respond here.I'll not read any reply, so don't reply just delete my profile.Goodbye. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=242675#p242675 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention Hello folks. The Ghost Rider, I feel a coward for not coming earlier to offer you a supporting hand dude.In some extent, I can at least imagine your pain.But the thing is, if she really loves you, as much as you love her, she will surely support you and wait for the right moment for you two to be together. Hold on to this, and use your feelings for her to as an extra fuel to keep you going. If you like to play music, use this as an inspiration for your creations. If you prefer writing, go and make your own world, make your ideas into characters, then face them, make them better, try to understand their reasons.I used to transform my issues into characters and sort of put them to use on tabletop rpg matches, to see if I can deal with them in a more introspective way.I could tell you about a really large amount of things with this topic, but it wont be as accurately as what I'm trying to show you. Again, I'm sorry, I'm really sorry for watching all this from a distance so far. I know I barely know you, and the majority of our fellow audiogamers, but I tend to care about other people. This being said, and now I may sound a bit contraditory... Perhaps you should try to see the whole thing from another point of view. It is always worst when we are in the eye of the storm, but try to retreat for a moment, and maybe you can see from a far, that haven you couldn't see earlier when you were there due to the gray nature of the situation.Best regards, Haramir. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=242676#p242676 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention Hello folks. The Ghost Rider, I feel a coward for not coming earlier to offer you a supporting hand dude.In some extent, I can at least imagine your pain.But the thing is, if she really loves you, as much as you love her, she will surely support you and wait for the right moment for you two to be together. Hold on to this, and use your feelings for her to as an extra fuel to keep you going. If you like to play music, use this as an inspiration for your creations. If you prefer writing, go and make your own world, make your ideas into characters, then face them, make them better, try to understand their reasons.I used to transform my issues into characters and sort of put them to use on tabletop rpg matches, to see if I can deal with them in a more introspective way.I could tell you about a really large amount of things with this topic, but it wont be as accurately as what I'm trying to show you. Again, I'm sorry, I'm really sorry for watching all this for a distance so far. I know I barely know you, and the majority of our fellow audiogamers, but I tend to care about other people. This being said, and now I may sound a bit contraditory... Perhaps you should try to see the whole thing from another point of view. It is always worst when we are in the eye of the storm, but try to retreat for a moment, and maybe you can see from a far, that haven you couldn't see earlier when you were there due to the gray nature of the situation.Best regards, Haramir. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=242676#p242676 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention Oh, boy. This topic is getting sticky.Dark, I understand your position. You need to protect the best interest of as many members of this publicly viewable forum as possible, as well as anyone else who might stumble upon this topic by accident, since anyone can read it. And, to that end, I can see how, as the owner of this little corner of the web, you'd feel responsible for what's said and done here. And anything that seems to be promoting suicide is quite a muddled point of contension indeed.More to the point, suicide isn't something that should be undertaken lightly, or because of situations that may clear up on their own in due course.But you'll never hear me say that it's wrong to take your own life if that's what you choose to do. In the first place, nobody wants to hear that when they're in such a dark place in their life. If you're considering suicide, you don't want to hear how bad and wrong and morally repr ehensible it is. Not only can those points be debated pretty easily, it's degrading to the person's current emotional state. I'm not saying that we should ever tell someone to go ahead and kill themselves. But I do believe that restricting their choice, whether those restraints are physical, as in being hospitalized and forcefully medicated, or emotionally, through guilt trips, religious diatribes, or simply trying to force a positive outlook down the person's throat, usually just breed resentment and distrust, and make the person much less likely to seek help again, and, in effect, making the suicide risk higher.Towards the beginning of this topic, KJones posted a link to a blog entry in which the author states that it helped him or her cope just knowing that self-harm was an option. During my own struggles with self-harm and suicidal thoughts, if someone had actually told me it was OK to have them, not how horrible of a person I was, I might have been le ss intent on destroying myself. It really makes a world of difference, knowing that you're not judged on what you do, but for who you are.Again, I want to reiterate that saying that a destructive behavior or thought process is OK is not the same as condoning it as a long-term, set in stone solution. it simply is what it is. I wish that more people would hold this view, and stop trying to bully and control those who are already in a fragile emotional state to bend to their will, just because society, the Bible, or common sense says it's icky. Forget all that crap for a minute and focus on the crises that have brought the person to whatever point of no return they're at. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=242817#p242817 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention Gelman, it's good to know you're very caring and you enforce my decision to want to die. I thank you. I may seem immature even replying to a post such as that, but it's people like you who use there intelligence as a weapon against those who have less or more than you but choose not to use it. Call me a weakling for choosing suicide over the ability to fight on, but once you're in my position you can say whatever you want. Oh, by the way, freedom of speech is your legal right. You should look into it. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=242776#p242776 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention Moderation!@Gellman, discussions of right to die etc are very much fine in their place and you are entitled to expressing and debating your opinions. That being said, this topic is not concerned with that particular ethical issue, but the position of someone in a severely bad state in life, here, and now! and discussions of the legal status of euthanasia and reitterations of "right to die" are highly inappropriate in such a situation, sinse any such decision should not be taken lightly or reinforced with moral polemics either way, what is needed here is understanding and empathy, not a forceful legal arguement, indeed such could be actively harmful in these sorts of circumstances.This is an official moderation warning! You are very much entitled to your views and to have debates on them in the correct place (eg in the topic you started on right to die), but when dealing with delicate situations such as that Ghost rider expresses here please show even more consideration than usual for the feelings of your fellow forum members. Do this again in such a topic and you will be banned from the forum, (this already happened once with someone expressing an intolerant christian perspective in a similar situation, so this is a warning that should be taken very seriously). URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=242669#p242669 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention If you want to kill yourself, you should just go ahead provided that your are of sane mind and suicide is legal in your country.What you should know about your right to die:- In most jurisdictions you have a legal right to refuse medical treatment and a correlary right to refuse nutrition even where said refusal is likely to lead to death or bodily failure.But be aware that this refusal must be unequivocally expressed and that you must probably undergo a mental evaluation so that the state can be sure that you aren't merely suffering from an eating disorder.- If you are younger than 18, the right to die likely does not apply and you can still be force fet inspite of your expressed will.But with all these qualifications, I think that you have a right to die and I am not prepared to second guess your motives or state of mind.The right to die is a human right. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=242651#p242651 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention If you want to kill yourself, you might want to explore your legal options.What you should know about your right to die:- In most jurisdictions you have a legal right to refuse medical treatment and a correlary right to refuse nutrition even where said refusal is likely to lead to death or bodily failure.But be aware that this refusal must be unequivocally expressed and that you must probably undergo a mental evaluation so that the state can be sure that you aren't merely suffering from an eating or other mental disorder.- If you are younger than 18, the right to die likely does not apply and you can still be force fet inspite of your expressed will.But with all these qualifications, I think that you have a right to die and I am not prepared to second guess your motives or state of mind.The right to die is a human right. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=242651#p242651 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention God bless you, GhostRider. I know what it feels like to have my heart broken; I also know what it's like to be depressed. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=241765#p241765 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention @Violinist, to be strict in a definitional sense any mental state is defigned as "chronic" when it interferes with the course of your life. Everyone feels depressed at some point or other, but it is when that depression becomes debilitating that it makes the leap into mental illness, whether or not it has a distinct cause, ie, what used to be called reactive depression, or whether it is indoginus, ie, like my friend just a genetic quirk of neuro chemistry with no discernable cause. So, it is quite possible to have "chronic" depression, ie, feelings of depression that are literally debilitating as a reaction to an event in a person's life, such as death of a loved one. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240941#p240941 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention I do love her... more than anything... my family keeps telling it's my first love, that I'll get over her. But I've tried to move on and I just can't. She is the one, the only girl I love or will ever love... URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=241039#p241039 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention @Ghostrider, I don't doubt your feelings on this, but equally it does sound like your family are! trying to do the right thing. There are unfortunately people who rush into things too fast as teenagers, start living together, even get married or start families then find things between them are not as ideal as they first suspected, (I know a guy this happened to, it was sad, they married when he was 17, then divorced when he was 23, luckily there were no children, but there are worse cases where there are!).This is one thing my lady and I are being careful of, indeed we've known each other for a year and are trying! to take things slowly, although living arrangements make it slightly unusual in this respect. So, I can understand your family's concern on this, particularly if you've been in an emotionally fragile state sinse they might doubt your capacity for judgement and see you as an unstable child rather than a responsable adult. I'd suggest that you separate the issues. Find a way of dealing with your depression, and when your feeling able to discuss the situation calmly and rationally like an adult, explain to your family that you have! thought about things clearly, are not going to rush into anything, and just want to be with Erowyn. What they fear is that you'll be in a bad situation, or at least this is what I assume, though frankly saying "Oh you'll get over her" is just plane calous. Still, I'd suggest perhaps trying a reasonable approach, ask them what their concerns are, and try to discuss things and show yourself to be a responsable person. However, bare in mind that such a discussion needs to be made at a time when you can be rational and are not in the real pit of depression, sinse otherwise things will deteriorate rapidly. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=241046#p241046 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
2015-12-02
Thread
AudioGames . net Forum — Off-topic room : themadviolinist via Audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention Ghost Rider, your beloved has a beautiful name. It's been a long time since I was a teen ager, thirty plus years, but I do remember the way love felt for me when I found it then. In fact, for me it hasn't changed all that much, which either says that love may be less changeable than adults who dismiss teenagers, or that I never grew up in the first place. *smile*I am not clear whether you feel that you suffer from chronic depression, or whether what you are feeling is a strong reaction to the specific event of your family seeking to separate you from Erowyn. A lot of the posts here seem to assume chronic depression, and they have said many good things. If it is a reaction to the specific event, then it may be easier to live through as you can hold on to the notion that time will pass and if your relationship is what you believe it to be, you can get to the point where you may pursue it regardless of what they may think.Believing as I do that love is probably the single most important thing we do with, to, and for one another, whether it be romantic/sexual love, or the love of which Christians speak, or simply that quiet and infinitely important love between friends who fit together like hand in glove, it is what we live to do and to be. So i will never dismiss your feelings as teenage hormone spikes or anything of the sort. You have access to a powerful source of inspiration in the love you feel and, presumably in the love she feels for you.Love alone doesn't get the dishes done. It's a verb, as well as a state of bliss and being. I cannot specifically advise you how to go forward, but if your love is as you describe it, you have it within you to manage, for your sake, for her sake, for what you might build together. I am not foretelling, I don't know you from Adam, but I know a thing or three about love and its power. Maybe it is enough to hold on to right now when you are feeling shattered and alone.As for the inappropriateness of posting this, screw that! There are times when we are allowed to ask to be seen, to have our humanity affirmed by others when it is needful. I hope that the things the rest of us have said here give you something to hold on to.Go well, little brother. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240919#p240919 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention That's pretty much what I was getting at, Dark. When you're a teenager, your outbursts, screwups and general lack of direction are just seen as hormonal imbalances. And, while that may be true to an extent, that can feel highly insulting at the time you're experiencing it, to have people just shrug you off and say that whatever you feel is exaggerated and overdramatic. Because, well, often it is, but does that make it any less valid? I think not.What society should be doing as a whole is a hell of a lot more validating. Not excusing, or coddling, or sugarcoating, but listening with an open mind, but mostly an open heart. Because you just don't know whether that one time you're not there, or that one time you react with sarcasm and cruelty rather than hearing the person out, is the one thing that sends them over the edge.Of course, there are a million and one reasons why that will never happen, the main two (and most important) being that most people simply don't have that kind of emotional intelligence, and the other one being that you wouldn't want to swing too far in the other direction and become overly permissive or a martyr, trying to save everyone but yourself. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240748#p240748 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention My views are this: I've always seen myself as mature beyond my years. Sure, I may be immature at times, but I'm always concerned about how my intelligence level makes me look. I want to be smart enough where I'm seen as respectable, not an idiot. That aside, my depression is mainly due to losing my Erowyn... I'd do anything to get her back. Many people say that she was my first love and that is not true. I've been searching and searching and she was the treasure I found... And they took that away from me... I fight back tears as I write this because I miss her with a depth that rivals that of my love for her... I truly do love her. I know it. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240758#p240758 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
2015-12-01
Thread
AudioGames . net Forum — Off-topic room : severestormsteve1 via Audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention That is a major problem, and it's another one of those "fine line" issues. Many teenagers are rebellious, out of control, and yes, immature. And when I say many, I'm not saying it in the since that "most all of them", I mean there are a lot like that. But because of those, and the fact that younger people in a lot of cases don't know how to express their emotions in a civilized manner, they are often misconstrued as childish tantrums, or in other cases, like what seems to be the case with Ghost Rider, attributed to lack of knowledge and wisdom due to a lack of years. And unfortunately, at least here in the states, it works like this. The adults are assumed to know best, especially for those holding parental status. Their decisions are final. And whether or not the teen or child has a say in the matter, (until they leave the parent's home), is dependent on the parent's willingness to listen. Also, I can see what Turtlepower meant in her post, 26, but I suppose the awkward and dishonorable feelings come from the desire to keep a relationship with "family" and not to let them down. But I personally believe it's all wrong. I'm under the belief that while discipline and structure are needed, just as with open mindedness and willingness to listen, that there is a such thing as going a bit too far. For example, where I live, it is compulsory, for all children to attend school, and consequences will be faced for not doing so. The problem is, though, there are students there who do not care, and have no desire to be there. I want success for myself, and I want a good education, but some people don't, and show that shamelessly. And while I'm almost certain that they will grow up and regret that, I also believe that if they got the chance to quit school and turn themselves into nothing, they could learn the dangers of the path they plan to take, and it would motivate them to go back and make something of themselves, versus being told they must, get an education and try to be successful when they clearly don't want to. It might hurt them, but sometimes that's the only good way to learn. And ultimately, in the end, they'll be doing what's right, motivated by past experience. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240753#p240753 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention @Ghostrider, first love (and speaking again from very recent experience here), when it is returned and you both feel it can be incredibly powerful, my lady and I are in the same position and the intensity of how much I love her is actively scary sinse it literally physically hurts, so yes, I get it, especially now. That being said, one thing to bare in mind is that simply by virtue of being teenagers your not necessarily in a fixed point in your lives just in terms of where you live and what your doing, however this is something you both need to work out and so long as neither of you takes steps too far there theoretically shouldn't be a problem. I'd personally suggest you to find a method of dealing with the depression and then discuss this situation with your family rationally and responsably, for example, accepting that your family are doing this out of some sense of protecting you. As to teenagers in general to be honest I would not want to draw any personal conclusions. My own adolescence was anything but usual. In general cultural assumptions about teenagers, and even more especially about male teenagers are prety nuts, but cultural assumptions about most things are pretty nuts and should be packed into the next available gift basket and delivered streight to hell, sinse that's generally where such lead . URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240764#p240764 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
2015-12-01
Thread
AudioGames . net Forum — Off-topic room : severestormsteve1 via Audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention That is a major problem, and it's another one of those "fine line" issues. Many teenagers are rebellious, out of control, and yes, immature. And when I say many, I'm not saying it in the since that "most all of them", I mean there are a lot like that. But because of those, and the fact that younger people in a lot of cases don't know how to express their emotions in a civilized manner, they are often misconstrued as childish tantrums, or in other cases, such as the one with Ghost Rider, attributed to lack of knowledge and wisdom due to a lack of years. And unfortunately, at least here in the states, it works like this. The adults are assumed to know best, especially for those holding parental status. Their decisions are final. And whether or not the teen or child has a say in the matter, (until they leave the parent's home), is dependent on the parent's willingness to listen. Also, I can see what Turtlepower meant in her post, 26, but I suppose the awkward and dishonorable feelings come from the desire to keep a relationship with "family" and not to let them down. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240753#p240753 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
2015-12-01
Thread
AudioGames . net Forum — Off-topic room : severestormsteve1 via Audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention That is a major problem, and it's another one of those "fine line" issues. Many teenagers are rebellious, out of control, and yes, immature. And when I say many, I'm not saying it in the since that "most all of them", I mean there are a lot like that. But because of those, and the fact that younger people in a lot of cases don't know how to express their emotions in a civilized manner, they are often misconstrued as childish tantrums, or in other cases, like what seems to be the case with Ghost Rider, attributed to lack of knowledge and wisdom due to a lack of years. And unfortunately, at least here in the states, it works like this. The adults are assumed to know best, especially for those holding parental status. Their decisions are final. And whether or not the teen or child has a say in the matter, (until they leave the parent's home), is dependent on the parent's willingness to listen. Also, I can see what Turtlepower meant in her post, 26, but I suppose the awkward and dishonorable feelings come from the desire to keep a relationship with "family" and not to let them down. But I personally believe it's all wrong. I'm under the belief that while discipline and structure are needed, just as with open mindedness and willingness to listen, that there is a such thing as going a bit too far. For example, it is compulsory, for all children to attend school, and consequences will be faced for not doing so. The problem is, though, there are students there who do not care, and have no desire to be there. I want success for myself, and I want a good education, but some people don't, and show that shamelessly. And while I'm almost certain that they will grow up and regret that, I also believe that if they got the chance to quit school and turn themselves into nothing, they could learn the dangers of the path they plan to take, and it would motivate them to go back and make somet hing of themselves, versus being told they must, get an education and try to be successful when they clearly don't want to. It might hurt them, but sometimes that's the only good way to learn. And ultimately, in the end, they'll be doing what's right, motivated by past experience. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240753#p240753 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention @Turtlepower, while I agree for the most part that eighteen is indeed just a number, different people have different circumstances, and the concept of "family" only really has as much relevance as it relates to one person, sinse ultimately sharing a few genes with someone has as much significance as both parties wish to invest in it.I know there are places where "the family" is law, and "father/mother knows best" etc etc, but just because a certain culture says something doesn't make it right in all circumstances or for all people, and it has to be a situation of give and take. On the one hand for example, we all know about adopted children growing up happily with none biological parents ((myself personally sinse my sister is adopted). Also, some people might have friends they consider to be literally like sisters or brothers, again, I am lucky enough to have two of these.On the darker side of things, I have encountered those , perhaps people who've had horrendous family lives, who actually will not call their parents "mother" or "father", but refer to them as "sperm or egg donor" Of course there are lots of shades of grey between these two extremes, and cases where children love their parents but still don't live with them. As you said, parents will always to an extent see children as "Their child" but that doesn't actively put a demand on said child to accept that. I speak from experience here, particularly sinse I am preparing to spend the first christmas of my life away from home with my lady in the states.As to emotional maturity, yes, I fully agree. Eighteen doesn't sygnify anything there and I've met plenty of people who are much older who behave like kids. That being said, part of that maturity is indeed learning to cope on your own and be independent with yourself, and for that you need! to handle what your fee ling, especially if the feelings get so extreme they're having a major effect on the rest of life. Indeed, learning how to support yourself will put you in a better position to support others. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240678#p240678 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention I don't know if I can get behind the "18 isn't far away" bandwagon here.In the first place, it's kind of patronizing. It may be true, but it doesn't help much in the moment. Teenagers don't usually have a firm grasp on long-term goal-setting, and I mean that in the least judgmental way possible, although I realize that it sounds harsh when said by a screen reader.It's also not entirely true that things change all that much when you're 18. Honestly, it's just a number, and the way most people view you won't change. Parents are usually notoriously bad about this; they will always see you as their child, in need of protection, long after you've flown from the nest. And of course, things get a lot more complicated when you still live at home as an adult for any number of reasons. Logic dictates that you should be able to make your own choices, but parents have ground rules that have been long established, and to go against those rules usually feels awkward and dishonorable. I speak from personal experience about all of this.When I was a teenager, I wanted, more than anything in the world, to make that magic number 18 come faster. I was convinced that it was the answer to all my angst and pain. I thought that being "legal" would make people want to listen to me, hear me out, care about my problems. Because I would be, in the eyes of the law at least, seen as capable, responsible, and able to make my own decisions.But how foolish of a concept is that, when you really stop to think about it? There are many, many adults who can't manage their own lives, relationships, and financial circumstances in a socially acceptable manner.And, of course, when I did turn 18, I was severely let down, because, not only did I not get my wish, I also found out that, as an adult, you actually have even less freedom to express your emotions and problems than you do as a teenag er. You have to be seen as capable, and you can't be capable if you rely on others excessively. It also doesn't help that I was raised in a family that encouraged me to bury my emotions, no matter the cost, but that's a whole other story.I think what I'm getting at here is that, whether you're 17 or 57, it doesn't make a bit of difference. While I would love it if we lived in a world where people were free to relate their experiences with depression without fear of repercussions, we sadly don't live in that world. Depression is a stigmatizing thing, whether it's situational or clinical. If I knew how to make it go away, I would. If I knew how to make the pain of losing an important relationship easier to deal with, I would. The only thing that usually helps in these kinds of situations is time, which isn't what you want to hear, either. But, if nothing else, time provides perspective as it marches on. You'll see things differe ntly eventually, even if it is grudgingly and by necessity. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240670#p240670 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention I've had some improvement as of late, but it crashed again when I heard some of our songs in McDonalds. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240652#p240652 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention I understand what your going through. I had this girl named Rachel and her parents didn't want me or her to date because I was blind. So I do understand and it hurts. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240526#p240526 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
2015-11-29
Thread
AudioGames . net Forum — Off-topic room : severestormsteve1 via Audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention True. And pretty much, the slightest miscommunication can knock something way out of proportion... for sure. And I mean the slightest. It could be how something was communicated, the words used, even something as simple as the tone of voice... who knows honestly. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240484#p240484 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention @Steve, I've not heard of Pittacus Lore, I'll have to check his/her books out. Btw if that is the author's name, I would guess roughly it's a guy sinse us at the end is usually a man while is or as at the end is more commonly a lady, though of course I am not certain. About the situation one thing I will say Steve, is that family dynamics, especially around relationships can be somewhat complex, even if there are no underlying issues, and quite often people will not be aware of all their reasons and motivations or will interpret the actions of others in a different light, especially when moving homes is concerned. There really isn't a good way of solving these problems without a little rationality and give and take on both sides, and that isn't going to happen when one person, namely Ghost rider is having depression related issues, because depression has a bad habbit of skewing things one way and making everything else more fragile. Maybe in the future it will! be a case of moving streight out and keeping some distance from the family. Maybe not, there isn't a way of saying really, but the immediate situation needs some easement in the best way hence why I approve of the various suggestions.A good friend of mine who suffers clinical, uncaused, simply genetic depression is wonderful for structuring her life around it. for example she'll just occasionally know she's having a bad day, she'll find various methods and points of dealing with how she feels, indeed one of her favourite saying when she's doing something really! practical and a person is being obstructive or patronising is "mad! not stupid" . I'm not saying this situation is similar, but that's probably why a good practical approach is what's called for im mediately here. Doing something displacing, finding places to vent, and then learning how to be a little more rational when possible. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240474#p240474 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention @Blademan, I completely agree, reading is awesome! I write reviews myself for fantasybookreview.co.uk, so if anyone is interested in my thoughts on sf and fantasy books check there (I'm just finishing one up for William Horwood's book Skalagrigg). URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240303#p240303 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention [[wow]].I tried to come up with some unique advice for you @ghostRider, but the awesome posts by @Nocturnus and others would put anything I could do to shame. I haven't been in that situation, but I have had to deal with some very hard family times as well as figuring out my place in the world (Where I'll go to college, how I'll get around, what I'll study, what bills do I need to pay).That stresses me out to no end, sometimes I just wish I was a kid again and could let my parents deal with all of it .Personally, when I get stressed, have a hard decision to make, when feeling sad, angry, happy... I read. I find that (corny as it sounds), escaping into a plot and world that isn't my own with characters that I have no connection to othe r than words in a book really relaxes me. I finish a good portion of a book, stop reading, and I'm much calmer about my situation and am usually able to come up with a solution.For some, it's music. For others, it's physical excersize. For me, it's books.If you haven't read much, (or don't read much now), pick up a good book and see if that helps. If you need good books, to read, mention me, (@bladehunter2213 on twitter) and I'll help. There are also an amazing number of sites dedicated to book reviews (yay!), my personal favorite is Goodreads.Of course this could all be useless information to you if your not a book reading kind of person, but man I feel better having actually tried to help in some small way rather than just reading the thread and moving on.Good luck, happy holidays, and never give up! URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240302#p240302 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention Hi,While this really sucks, and I've had to go through something similar myself, me and my fiance are planning to move in long term with each other pritty soon. So, I know from experience, it does get better. As for depression, I'm still going through that. But, I have managed to find things that help. Music production, programming, and gaming. I talk to the one or two people I truly trust and I made a great friend just by talking to people. School sucks. It really does, especially if you feel like you're getting nowhere. But again, this is something that will get better given time and effort. As for the girl you love, is there any way of seeing her without your family knowing? I know its not the most ideal, and its probably bad advice to say do something against if not the law, then the law of your family, but it might help.Just my thoughts. I'm always here to help if needed, @kylecunningham5 on twitter. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240317#p240317 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention Weee more reviews! Will do! URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240306#p240306 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention We're secretly still a couple but because of my family she's afraid to come online because she thinks they're on there but they're not. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240346#p240346 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention hi,Check out this websitewww.helpguide.orgIt has very useful mental health and self help strategies, including depression, bipolar disorder etc. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240411#p240411 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
2015-11-28
Thread
AudioGames . net Forum — Off-topic room : severestormsteve1 via Audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention @GhostRider man, this whole situation sounds... weird to me to say the least. I can see why you're upset, but then again there could be details that you're choosing not to share on the forum, which is perfectly acceptable. But they say she's lying to, and hurting you? I'm a bit confused, because either they didn't say what she was doing, and didn't prove it was true, just seemed to shut her out which, again, is confusing to me. I don't know that situation, I don't know what they told you what she was doing, and if you don't want to share that, again. Perfectly acceptible. But I do want to ask this. Have you tried to ask them what the issue is? Have you tried to talk to them about it, (and I mean in a non-screaming and yelling matter, which, judging by your alleged maturity level I highly doubt you'd get into such a fight with them)? Of course, perhaps you did try that only to be told you were wrong and they were right and no more t alk because I'm mom and I've said so. In which case, you can only keep doing that which you are currently doing. Surely, you'd know if she was lying and hurting you by now, she's been your girl for... gosh I don't even know. But even still, one who is madly in love could or should be able to detect such a big flaw with their significant other that it would cause their family to "protect" them from that person. So bottom line, and I'm sorry for the above rambling mumble jumble that was my thoughts on the situation, don't give up. 18 is not far away... Also, and I really don't mean to hijack this topic, but I really have a question for you, Dark. Have you read the Lorean Legacy books by Pittacus Lore? If not, I really suggest you give it a look. I've read plenty of fantacy and science fiction (alien related) books, but these... literally had me hooked. Because there are multiple characters, most of which hiding from a n evil alien race, you get a good look at multiple cultures of not only Earth, but the planet which they come from, Lorean. I also find it funny that Pittacus Lore, the author, puts his/herself in the series as an ancient legend of a character. I know, I kind of suck at book reviews, but I seriously suggest you give this a look. The way it combines science fiction and fantacy is... amazing to me. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240418#p240418 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
2015-11-28
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AudioGames . net Forum — Off-topic room : severestormsteve1 via Audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention @GhostRider man, this whole situation sounds... weird to me to say the least. I can see why you're upset, but then again there could be details that you're choosing not to share on the forum, which is perfectly acceptable. But they say she's lying to, and hurting you? I'm a bit confused, because either they didn't say what she was doing, and didn't prove it was true, just seemed to shut her out which, again, is confusing to me. I don't know that situation, I don't know what they told you what she was doing, and if you don't want to share that, again. Perfectly acceptible. But I do want to ask this. Have you tried to ask them what the issue is? Have you tried to talk to them about it, (and I mean in a non-screaming and yelling matter, which, judging by your alleged maturity level I highly doubt you'd get into such a fight with them)? Of course, perhaps you did try that only to be told you were wrong and they were right and no more t alk because I'm mom and I've said so. In which case, you can only keep doing that which you are currently doing. Surely, you'd know if she was lying and hurting you by now, she's been your girl for... gosh I don't even know. But even still, one who is madly in love could or should be able to detect such a big flaw with their significant other that it would cause their family to "protect" them from that person. So bottom line, and I'm sorry for the above rambling mumble jumble that was my thoughts on the situation, don't give up. 18 is not far away... Also, and I really don't mean to hijack this topic, but I really have a question for you, Dark. Have you read the Lorien Legacies books by Pittacus Lore? If not, I really suggest you give it a look. I've read plenty of fantacy and science fiction (alien related) books, but these... literally had me hooked. Because there are multiple characters, most of which hiding from an evil alien race, you get a good look at multiple cultures of not only Earth, but the planet which they come from, Lorien. I also find it funny that Pittacus Lore, the author, puts his/herself in the series as an ancient legend of a character, namely the "most powerful of the elders". I know, I kind of suck at book reviews, but I seriously suggest you give this a look. The way it combines science fiction and fantacy is... amazing to me. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240418#p240418 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention Thank you all... I'm trying to keep on going. I should elaborate, this girl was not my first love. I've had others. But I truly thought, and still think, that she is the one. I hope to fight through this rough patch and marry her someday. I know I now, I'm only sixteen, or will be next month, but I've gone through things in my life that have given me the mentality of a 30 or even 40 year old. I've been told I'm more mature than most 30 year olds out there. Anyhow, that's beside the point. The way my depression works is I'll lay for hours on my laptop, talking to a friend about it then 30 seconds later we're cracking jokes and poking fun at one another, then 30 seconds later the cycle begins again. I imagine it's exhausting for them and more than a tad annoying. There are times where I'll turn on a song and just curl up and cry. It'll last maybe 5 minutes, then I'll feel better for a few hours. I always stop myself fr om ending it to think how would Erowyn feel? How would my best friend Brit feel? How would my family feel? My uncle who I go hunting with every deer season? My mom and sister? My friend Dustin, or my best blind friend Khannon? I know I have people who care about me even if I don't see it at times. Sometimes I forget that. They, especially Erowyn, are the ones who keep me fighting from day to day. I may be extremely angry with my mom and sister, and yes very afraid of them, but I know somewhere deep down that they do love me. Sometimes I just can't stand the thought of going through another day. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240230#p240230 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention @ghost rider,Speaking from experience I can honestly say that I'm glad you brought this here instead of bottling it up inside, and while your case is probably not all that much different from many others, I can't think of anything else I'd rather be doing right now which is more important than reading about it and writing back. Let me tell you a little story, a story that is true as true can be. This one doesn't begin once upon a time, because it's ongoing and characters are still being added to it.When I turned 16, I fell madly in love with a girl, a girl who many would have said that on the surface was not worth my time; I'll not include the reasoning behind such a statement. Needless to say that there was someone in the world, someone I was willing to do anything and sacrifice anything for.And yet, no matter what I did, it was never good enough. One day, I finally opened up to the fullest extent. ; I didn't want to; I needed to. I needed to know just how much I could share about my philosophies, my ideas, my fears, my worries and doubts and anxieties and the desire to seek reality to the fullest. I didn't know it then like I know it now, but I needed to know how much I could trust, because I, unlike you, was holding onto too much, from being told by my mother to kill myself when I was 12, to being lied to by my father on countless occasions for countless reasons that I still cannot find excuses for. I ran out of people and reasons to confide anything and kept it all inside. I agonized over stressful situations, wrote many words that could probably fill many pages about the seemingly purposeless life we all live. I reasoned within my solitude that if one couldn't trust one's own flesh and blood, there was no one to trust.It is no secret that I became a Christian, but that is not what this post is about. I could pre ach a wonderful sermon to you about why you should accept Jesus, but I don't think that's what you want to hear, because it certainly wasn't what I wanted to hear during all of that time. I could tell you I'll be praying for you , which I will, and yet I don't know if you would truly understand the significance of it and the hopes that lie within such a statement for me personally. What I hope will make a difference to you is the following; even the humblest of souls touches others. If you don't believe me, consider that today, while I am sitting here writing to you with intense pain in my right eye from goodness only knows what, with no money to speak of so as to get a cab to go get it checked out, which means I'll probably have to wait awhile for some form of transportation, I am thankful and joyful. No, not happy; joyful. Happiness is a fickle thing, an emotion that sometimes eludes you for years on end or comes at you with an intense insanity that makes you smile like a lunatic. It may stick around for 10 seconds or 10 months. Joy? That's another thing altogether and a hard one to explain without talking about life. Life is such a complex and beautiful thing, even under the most terrible of circumstances.Yes, I know that is hard to accept; believe me, I know. The saddest and angriest and most afraid you've ever been can bring you to your knees or drop you flat on your face in anguish and frustration because you haven't the slightest idea if or how to deal with it, not a clue if it's even possible that it will ever end. The seconds turn seemingly into endless lifetimes that in themselves contain countless perpetual eternities where one wishes to welcome nothingness and embrace oblivion. They wear and tear at you, taunting your existence, scorning your being and pushing you further down into a demon infested mucky hellhole that taxes every bit of you, and even with all of my elaborations I cannot do justice to what you might be feeling; you may in fact, feel like you have escaped human comprehension!If, however, you've felt anything like what I've just described, I want you to know that I have too. Today, I am 27 years old, am no longer with the first person I spoke of in this post, but am instead married to a beautiful woman and helping her parent a child from a previous relationship as we sit here expecting our first child together within less than a month; she could be here tonight! I've recently obtained help from a company called miracle ear to battle onward with my ongoing hearing issues; the people are absolutely incredible. I've relocated from Texas to Florida and that alone is enough in some ways to make me happy.None of these, however, are as powerful as the fact that none of this could have happened if I hadn't chosen to come to grips with the realization that even in the darkest of days or the hardest of hours, when it seemed like there was no hope in heaven or hell, no reason for living, no purpose in trying, no goodness in crying, no evil in dying, under the burden and strain of all I was living with on my
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention Afrim is completely correct. I know what it feels like; I have been depressed. I know how difficult life can be. No matter how depressed you may feel, Do not give up. Do not give up! URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240220#p240220 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention I couldn't have said it better myself, Nocturnus. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240229#p240229 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention [edit: Dark's post is better than this one. If this one starts to seem counterproductive, read Dark's again.](I can't promise that any of these resources will be helpful. They're just the first things I could think of.)r/depressionThings that sometimes help when you have depression (I don't expect you can access these unless it's through school, if your family is such a big part of the problem, and depression and blindness both make applying all of them difficult, but just in case it helps...)DBT: Crisis Survivalr/mentalhealth (I haven't looked into this subreddit in any depth; I've heard people complain about a few norms it h as, so I'd be reluctant to post anything there.)There's the national suicide prevention hotline, if you're in the US. I hear lots of people complaining about it having long wait times and just directing you to local therapists, though.Will counseling help? Heck if I know. The trouble with all these interventions is that none of them address inescapable life circumstances that lead to the problems; they try to aim for the things that a trip to a doctor/ph arm acy think they can handle. Sometimes, this makes a big enough difference that people can cope, find new ways to fix things, etc. Sometimes it doesn't.I want to say "Make it through the next four years, then grab all the opportunities you can while the government will still pay for them", but I'm pretty sure I'd hate it if someone told me that. I can't think of anything better, though. Generally speaking, I've come across loads of people who were unhappy and ev en suicidal as teenagers who found college/legal freedom an amazing improvement. (I am not one of them, but it really depends on specific details, especially the people.)Your family sabotaging other relationships doesn't tell us much by itself (although I've only heard of that ending well in TV shows), but combined with your mother threatening to commit suicide in front of you, it's pretty clear there is a lot wrong in this situation. It isn't clear from your description whether it's a case of Borderline Personality, or emotional abuse. people have a tendency to describe them similarly, much to the chagrin of not-so-abusive borderlines (link focuses on romantic relationships, but there might be something worth reading there?).I wish I could offer something better than "please hold on a while longer", but these things never seem to lend themselves t o straightforward solutions. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240194#p240194 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention Hi Ghost Rider. Well this isn't exactly the right forum for discussion of personal issues or venting, on the other hand the fact you shared this hear is important and we'd be a pretty scummy bunch if we said "smeg off and go somewhere else" that being said, if you just need someone to vent to, try The Samaritans I know the name sounds overtly christian (sinse it comes from the parrable about Jesus christ), but the organization is a definitely secula one. Basically, you phone then, and they give you space to sit and say whatever, they listen, and if you get someone who knows what they 're talking about, they listen cooperatively. So, if you needed to have a good vent to someone, that might be a good place. I'd also suggest talking a bit to your doctor if possible, sinse there are things that can be done to just make you feel better, perhaps counselling perhaps something else, but if you don't talk to someone outside your immediate circumstance then your stuck dealing with things on your own. I can't really speak for the actual problems other than to listen sympathetically, however I will remind you you are a teenaged boy and will be a legal adult in the future. At that point you will be able to do what you want and be with whom you want, particularly if your parents' judgement is off. It may also be that your mum and your sister just need to get used to the idea, ultimately I don't really know and I wouldn't hazard a guess. Personally however, for the moment I'd suggest you probably ne ed to have a good vent, find a way to deal with how your feeling, then consider things a little mor rationally. Resource management games, a few rounds of mortal kombat, some physical exercise, some high coco chocolate, whatever is likely to help with your immediate feelings. one thing I have learnt is that there are things we think about ourselves and our lives (especially as a teenager but often enough afterwards as well), that aren't reasonable or accurate, and feeling we have which aren't particularly good to act on, but still need dealing with. I've had to do this enough myself, and perhaps it's a suggest you might find useful as well. Hth. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240193#p240193 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention Just keep looking, there are enough honest and loving people in the world that, before long, you'll find someone else, and just might be better off for it.And remember, suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240208#p240208 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention (I can't promise that any of these resources will be helpful. They're just the first things I could think of.)r/depressionThings that sometimes help when you have depression (I don't expect you can access these unless it's through school, if your family is such a big part of the problem, and depression and blindness both make applying all of them difficult, but just in case it helps...)DBT: Crisis Survivalr/mentalhealth (I haven't looked into this subreddit in any depth; I've heard people complain about a few norms it has, so I'd be reluctant to post anything there.)There's the national suicide prevention hotline, if you' re in the US. I hear lots of people complaining about it having long wait times and just directing you to local therapists, though.Will counseling help? Heck if I know. The trouble with all these interventions is that none of them address inescapable life circumstances that lead to the problems; they try to aim for the things that a trip to a doctor/ph arm acy think they can handle. Sometimes, this makes a big enough difference that people can cope, find new ways to fix things, etc. Sometimes it doesn't.I want to say "Make it through the next four years, then grab all the opportunities you can while the government will still pay for them", but I'm pretty sure I'd hate it if someone told me that. I can't think of anything better, though. Generally speaking, I've come across loads of people who were unhappy and even suicidal as teenagers who found college/legal freedom an amazing improvement. (I am not one of them, but it really depends on specific details, especially the people.)Your family sabotaging other relationships doesn't tell us much by itself (although I've only heard of that ending well in TV shows), but combined with your mother threatening to commit suicide in front of you, it's pretty clear there is a lot wrong in this situation. It isn't clear from your description whether it's a case of Borderline Personality, or emotional abuse. people have a tendency to describe them similarly, much to the chagrin of not-so-abusive borderlines (link focuses on romantic relationships, but there might be something worth reading there?).I wish I could offer something better than "please hold on a while longer", but these things never seem to lend themselves to straightforward solutions. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240194#p240194 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention Agreed with all of the posts on here. As much as it pisses me off how your mom and sister are treating your love, you will be the master decider once you're 18, so that's something to look forward to. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240262#p240262 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention Nocturnus's post is absolutely incredible and to be honest, one of the best posts I've ever read on this forum. I will read and read it again and again.Truly, thank you for giving me the opportunity to read such an astonishing post. Hope we'll have more of posts like this. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240253#p240253 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention My dear friend, I will be praying for you. God has a plan for everyone, and his love is like nothing you've experienced. You may not believe in God, but I'll still be praying. God bless you! URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240217#p240217 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention Hi,Life gets very dam difficult at times mate, but you should, never, never give up.I know how sad it can be when nothing goes as you dream or wish. I experienced this many times, when I had to give up on music, when I started high school without friends and momentarily at the university, where everything is a whole crap. Not that I'm an expert on psychological training and counciling, but I'd suggest you do those things that you like mostly. If you like music, listen to your favourite one and enjoy it as much as you can. The most useful suggestion I'd recommend, is just talk, talk to your nearest and dearest. That's what I myself do and it works. Even explaining and talking about your problems with your friend washes away your stress. Gather together, go out with your mates, and, do! crazy things! and make you and yourself laugh. Take away your reluctance and do not always keep your mind stuck to what happened. Sleep for many hours, and consider reading books, those that catch your curiosity, of course. In other words, do those things that you like to do when you are either happy or sad.I don't know why you feel so hesitant to consider a psychologist, we say here but as I may notice you use the term counciler. They've been able to calm down people even under a more ergent shock.I'm very serious bro.So hope you get better and enjoy the time as much as possible.Cheers. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240218#p240218 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention @Ghostrider, crying is good, it provides catharsis. If however things are this serious then you probably do need to start looking at ways of managing to live with this. Firstly, finding things you can do when these feelings of depression hit as I said. I'd also suggest talking to a doctor sinse there are things that can help. Counselling, when done well can be a good thing. It's not particularly about talking to someone sympathetic, it's basically about exploring what your feeling and how you react. It's bloody hard work when done properly, extremely exhausting, but worth it in the end, provided of course you are getting counselling from someone who vaguely knows what they're doing.If your depression has a chemical element to it, and doesn't have as much reason, medication is also an option. I know there is a lot of social stigma about this, however it's not really as big a deal as you imagine. Anti depressan ts won't mke your problems go away, and unlike all the onesin films they won't change your memory or personality, they just make things a little less extreme and the feelings of depression a trifle easier to cope with, just the same way if your prone to stomach upsets, taking an antacid after a large meal makes you less prone to stomach aches.Similarly, feel free to vent on here if you wish, though you could also consider looking for a site with a forum that has individuals in a similar state so that you have somewhere safe to share these sorts of things without worrying about your friends.Btw, Nocturnus above post is eloquent as ever and beautifully phrased and put together. I very much admire his faith, and I don't mean his faith in God (though that itself is admirable), but his faith in humanity, and karma and life in general.Myself I never could manage that sort of state, it's something I really admire. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240250#p240250 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
Re: This isn't for attention
Re: This isn't for attention @Dark and afrim,Thank you both. Honestly, it's encouragement like yours that fuels my beliefs still further and makes me want to try harder. We can go around and around pontificating on the ethics of man and man's nature or the idea that we live in a fallen world Verses the possibility that all is a matter of adaptation and evolution, but given that over the past year I've made it no secret what I believe or why it seems rather pointless. My greatest goal is to provide a hand to those in need, a voice to those too scared to speak, a strength for those too weak to stand, and loving grace for those who reach out for it, because while all of it sounds paradoxical, it is easier, methinks, to find the bad in life than it is to find the good. An old Scottish prayer comes to mind that goes, "Dear God, I thank thee a thousand times for the roses; help me to thank thee for the thorns as well." Even if you never want to believe in the ideas I've presented, I still hold that this prayer in itself illustrates just how we tend to work along with the realization that only by looking at those things that hurt and overcoming them can we truly appreciate the great things in life and in this world. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240269#p240269 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
This isn't for attention
This isn't for attention The irony of the topic name is not lost on me. A topic name like that will draw attention wanted or not. Anyhow, I thought I'd elaborate on the reason it is named as such. I do not seek to draw attention for my own selfish needs in the following post, I only seek to vent.I am depressed. There I said it. Depressed and suicidal. I have not yet self-harmed but I'm not afraid to. Recently my family pushed my only love and only happiness away because they said she wasn't who she said she was and she was lying to me and hurting me. But in doing so, they hurt me. Now before you say they're just my family and they care for me, don't. I've heard it a million times and while it may be true, she's the only one I love, have loved, or will ever love. Period, done, over with. My mom and sister are raging psychos. Just the other day my mom went off on me for saying I didn't feel like talking about my current mood and my sister gets angry with me if I ask her to help me make food. Sure sure, normal family things, but my mom threatened to kill herself in front of me once. I'm honestly done with living here. School is hard, very hard. I'm failing only one class but it's enough to bring my morale down. I know I should get help. I know I should seek counseling. But I don't think that will help. I'm hopeless, I'm already considering ending it on a daily basis. I've got friends I talk to and only a select few members of my family know and I intend to keep it that way. I'm sorry I know this isn't exactly the place to post this, the title of the forum is Audiogames not Help-For-A-Suicidal-Teenage-Boy-Who's-Probably-Just-Going-Through-Puberty-Or-Something. But I had to tell someone. Anyone. So if I do the extreme someday soon... just know I'm sorry. URL: http://forum.audiogames.net/viewtopic.php?pid=240179#p240179 ___ Audiogames-reflector mailing list Audiogames-reflector@sabahattin-gucukoglu.com https://sabahattin-gucukoglu.com/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/audiogames-reflector
