RE: Some pretty pictures ...

2001-06-11 Thread Matthew Jones
For some reason, that reminded me of tchrist, especially the ---^^^ Is that Northern for Jesus? -- matt | only a wardrobe away

RE: [Announce] Hackspoitation film fest

2001-05-24 Thread Matthew Jones
Wow, and she's got three kids by Steven Seagal. The eighties were a crazy decade and people did a lot of things they regret. Well, would *you* say no to Steven Seagal? -- matt jones 'What you have begun in anger you shall end in shame.'

RE: Sara Cox - was Re: FHM Top 100 Sexiest Women

2001-05-21 Thread Matthew Jones
Dave Cross: And besides, since when could you work out how sexy a woman (or man) was simply by looking at a photo. Its in the eyes, Dave, its in the eyes. See, I find it's in the personality. Which doesn't come across too well in glossy magazine. Hmmm. I wonder how you'd go about

RE: Sara Cox - was Re: FHM Top 100 Sexiest Women

2001-05-21 Thread Matthew Jones
I seem to recall some comic giving a rant to the effect of Used to be just the magazines on the top shelf, everyone knew where they were, everyone knew what they were for. Then these FHM, Loaded, etc though - huh? What are they, for blokes who aren't sure if they want to masturbate? Not

RE: Sara Cox - was Re: FHM Top 100 Sexiest Women

2001-05-21 Thread Matthew Jones
See, I find it's in the personality. Which doesn't come across too well in glossy magazine. Hmmm. I wonder how you'd go about making personality pr0n? Mills and Boon. Well, no, I just had this conversation offlist. I'd say that personality pr0n is an oxymoron. YMMV. -- matt so how

RE: Some Northern Irish Fun and Games ...

2001-05-18 Thread Matthew Jones
http://news.bbc.co.uk/hi/english/uk/northern_ireland/newsid_1336000/1336347. stm Maybe their reason is wrong, but banning line dancing is a worthy end, surely? We could get rid of Steps at a stroke. Except Faye, of course. -- matt so how you gonna kick it? gonna kick it root down.

RE: Some Northern Irish Fun and Games ...

2001-05-18 Thread Matthew Jones
http://news.bbc.co.uk/hi/english/uk/northern_ireland/newsid_1336000/1336347. stm Oh! This has to get my Quote of the Week: As far as it being sensual, that is not a word you would attribute to country music. -- matt so how you gonna kick it? gonna kick it root down.

Politics (was RE: BOFHs requiring license)

2001-05-14 Thread Matthew Jones
Robert Shiels: Over the next 4 years, Labour will fail to deliver their promises yet again, and the country will swing back to the party of low taxes, who will be re-elected in 2006. Part of the reason why they haven't delivered the promises that I think are important (decent public

RE: Politics (was RE: BOFHs requiring license)

2001-05-14 Thread Matthew Jones
I genuinely believe that the public are sick of watching the NHS, education system etc wasting away on a starvation diet and would be willing to pay a bit of extra tax to make sure that their kids can get schooled and that their sick can be healed. When have they ever been asked? During

RE: Politics (was RE: BOFHs requiring license)

2001-05-14 Thread Matthew Jones
I appoint Greg as my Culture Adviser and as head of the church. Any volunteers for my other minions? Even if you don't want a cabinet post, please feel free to volunteer as a Henchman. You'll get 25 days holiday a year, a nice uniform and a free Hench. Minister for Perilous Boogiedowns,

RE: Politics (was RE: BOFHs requiring license)

2001-05-14 Thread Matthew Jones
In 1997 the UK voted against the Conservatives. The policies being offered by the parties were close to identical. For values of conservative that are low-tax/shitty services, IMHO. The policies may have been close, but the perception of the two parties still pointed at Labour as the party of

RE: Politics (was RE: BOFHs requiring license)

2001-05-14 Thread Matthew Jones
Just because they can't deliver those promises for those costs doesn't mean no one else can. If they knew they couldn't deliver within those cost constraints why did they lie and say they could? Because they are (right-wing) politicians. Just look at the absurd promisises Hague's lot are

RE: Perl training

2001-05-14 Thread Matthew Jones
http://www.iterative-software.com/training/ Can you do another Perl course, please? CHOPS programming: What's in the box? This two day course is aimed at l4me to virtually pubescent Perl programmers. We aim to give students the underpinning knowledge and skills required for them to make a

RE: Politics (was RE: BOFHs requiring license)

2001-05-14 Thread Matthew Jones
Ah, yes. That's like we're listening, isn't it, in response to the fuel crisis? We're not going to do anything, but we're happy to listen. That narked me about the fuel protestors. They claimed the government aren't listening. Listen ne cave in to the selfish demands of a few protestors who

RE: More politics (was Re: BOFHs requiring license)

2001-05-14 Thread Matthew Jones
Here's a pretty fundamental issue. Why do so many people seem to think that low taxes are good? Because many people think that they are better judges of how their own money should be spent than the government (of whatever flavour) is. This is something I've always wondered about. Given

RE: Politics (was RE: BOFHs requiring license)

2001-05-14 Thread Matthew Jones
Hospital waiting lists are up, No, hospital waiting lists are down. The time spent waiting to get on the wiating list is up. :) so are class sizes in schools. No, class sizes are down in primary schools (were primaries specified on the pledge card?). Secondary school classes are level or

RE: Politics (was RE: BOFHs requiring license)

2001-05-14 Thread Matthew Jones
the pump lobby respond by suggesting that the government drop tax. Why don't they ever have a go at BP or Shell? You don't elect BP or Shell. Well, precisely, they're companies, so you boycott them. Which is what I thought that dump the pump was originally about; boycotting oil companies

RE: Politics (was RE: BOFHs requiring license)

2001-05-14 Thread Matthew Jones
Are they in reality, or is it due to the current lot being in lower birth years than the lot 4 years ago, and hence the secondary school numbers being up now? Heh, it's pre-election statistics, so god knows what possible conne4ction to reality they may have! :) -- matt | I mean to make you

RE: UK programmers left-wing? was Re: BOFHs requiring license

2001-05-14 Thread Matthew Jones
(trolllhave you ever noticed how left wingers tend to be less tolerant to the fact that their views may be wrong than right wing people?/troll) Ah, that's because we left-wingers *are* right, and also because secretly, silently, you right-wingers know it, too. :P -- matt The

RE: Politics (was RE: BOFHs requiring license)

2001-05-14 Thread Matthew Jones
Some spokesman on the radio this morning promised to reduce class sizes in primary schools and to recruit more secondary school teachers. How can they achieve the former without recruiting more teachers? I'd assume that they would recruit more Classroom Assistants. Sort of paradidacts

RE: Politics (was RE: BOFHs requiring license)

2001-05-14 Thread Matthew Jones
class but reducing the pupil/adult ration, I guess. -^^ Heh. I bet it was the MAFF comment which planted that one. -- matt The (void) is that which stands right in the middle of this and That.

RE: Politics (was RE: BOFHs requiring license)

2001-05-14 Thread Matthew Jones
So how, pray, do I opt out of the international oil companies' cartel? use the tube and electric trains? Most power stations aren't oil fired AFAIK. Not even then, I guess. Am I right in thinkming that many plastics are (by-)products of the refining process? So that's internal

RE: Irish music (was RE: Movies (was Re: Buffy musings ...))

2001-05-10 Thread Matthew Jones
Dave Cross: You sound like the kind of person who would really enjoy the Cambridge Folk Festival Or, indeed, the Holmfirth Folk Festival: on this weekend for all your real ale, finger-in-ear, set-in-summer-wine-country needs http://www.riceholm.demon.co.uk/ -- matt | CHOPS

RE: London.pm List Weekly Summary 2001-05-07

2001-05-10 Thread Matthew Jones
http://www.unixbeard.net/~richardc/Photos/2001-04-30/2001-04-30.14:42:51.jpe g heh: http://www.snurfer.org/sands/gfx/vertigo.jpg Did your palms sweat too, richard? -- matt | CHOPS

sing if you're happy that way

2001-05-08 Thread Matthew Jones
Wisty - next T-shirt please: use strict is gay Heh. On the back -w is jolly? -- matt | right hemisphere, wrong planet

RE: JOB: Another one (Banking)

2001-04-19 Thread Matthew Jones
How can you inadvertently hack ? "I'll just quickly knock a little something together to do task X ... hmmm, actually, wouldn't it be cool if it could also do task Y, just for convenience sake ... hmm, that works, but I'm sure it could work stronger/faster/better than before ... " And so on

RE: Silly postings

2001-04-06 Thread Matthew Jones
Hm. Looking over this you might not want to read it if you're eating or anything. I reserve judgement until I've had a NY pizza and a NY coffee. However, I expect neither to be up to the standards I expect :-) You have to beat Roma* to be acceptable. I've had a NY pizza and it was

sheik your booty

2001-04-06 Thread Matthew Jones
Elect is a harsh term here. The man was appointed, crowned if you will. Not unlike youre queen, from what I can tell, though I've to date never seen her described as a bumbling idiot. Maybe the BBC keeps that quiet? Heh, have you never *seen* "our" royal family in action? It's not just

RE: Ummm... Perl not professional??

2001-04-06 Thread Matthew Jones
I certainly don't consider myself "professional", even though I try to ply my trade in what I believe to be a "professional" manner. "I'm not a professional, I'm a gifted amateur." The source of that escapes for the moment. -- matt "'scuse me trooper, will you be needing any packets today?

RE: Grammar (was: Re: Linux.com Online Chat)

2001-04-04 Thread Matthew Jones
True. Shouldn't we also need to include "should'nt" (etc.) here as well? . These are trivially simple rules to teach/learn - so why they aren't taught (or possibly aren't learnt) says something about the education system and the attitude of the pupils therein. I don't know which education

RE: Grammar (was: Re: Linux.com Online Chat)

2001-04-04 Thread Matthew Jones
I was at school from up to 1995 and grammer, hand writing and similar were only lightly touched upon. IT was another subject that we never actually did (other than read about spreadsheets leading to my adult hatred of Excel) and as far as I'm aware none of my friends of the same age did

RE: Grammar (was: Re: Linux.com Online Chat)

2001-04-04 Thread Matthew Jones
soapboax Wrong. There was a concerted effort by the loony left to destroy decent education in favour of whatever trendy piffle that was the order of the day. Oy! That's my family (lefty teachers) you're talking about! I went through the state comprehensive system and was never touched by

RE: London.pm List Weekly Summary 2001-03-19

2001-03-23 Thread Matthew Jones
For even more points: What was the first TV show the Lenny Henry appeared on? Ironically for "right-on" Lenny, it was The Black And White Minstrel Show. Ph3@r my Lenny Henry trivia skills! -- matt "'scuse me trooper, will you be needing any packets today? hey, baby, don't be pulling on my

RE: London.pm List Weekly Summary 2001-03-19

2001-03-23 Thread Matthew Jones
Ironically for "right-on" Lenny, it was The Black And White Minstrel Show. Hmm... now you've gone and made me doubt myself. I thought it was New Faces. http://homepages.go.com/~chefjunkie/Lennysnotlaughing.html http://ayup.co.uk/gods/gods0-4.html Search for "Minstrel". Okay, so he was

RE: Perl Training Courses

2001-03-21 Thread Matthew Jones
I'm interested if there are courses on offer. There's only so much you can do with just yourself and a pile of O'Reilly books. I'd love to help, but we're not in a position to offer public courses yet - the cost of hiring rooms and PCs is too prohibitive. Who said anything about doing

RE: Perl Training Courses

2001-03-21 Thread Matthew Jones
I'm interested if there are courses on offer. There's only so much you can do with just yourself and a pile of O'Reilly books. The mind boggles ;) No, not the *mind*! ;) Oh, I forgot to mention the Prairie Squid (de-beaked, of course). -- matt "'scuse me trooper, will you be needing

RE: Matt's Scripts Projects

2001-03-20 Thread Matthew Jones
Not neccesary from a techical point of view. Neccesary from a social point of view (What's this extension! I don't understand! What's going on! Excewpt that windows machines tend not to even show the extension by default, and so the file will just have a little WinZip icon[0], which

RE: New Perl Stuff From O'Reilly

2001-03-15 Thread Matthew Jones
As a Perl novice I'd have to say the old version looks much better. Just replacing Programming Perl would have been enough. As another person at an early stage in my Perl self-development, I'll second this, and add that I'd like to add the Owl book on regexps, although I suppose that's not

RE: Strange Request

2001-03-13 Thread Matthew Jones
do you exclude this script from the archive on the basis that it uses TT? this question defines the archive of scripts a little. is the collection of scripts specifically aimed at the lowest commond denominator and tackling the MW problem directly, or is that just its core mission, and

RE: Greetings

2001-02-23 Thread Matthew Jones
Cordelia Airhead Arrogant, too. IMO. Being a 8uffy refusenik, I'm a little confused by this conversation. Do you think there might be any websites about 8uffy of Sarah Michelle Gellar out there that I can trawl for info? I know it's a long shot. Hem. :) -- matt jones 'You

RE: t-shirts

2001-02-21 Thread Matthew Jones
We've been talking about t-shirts on irc, and I think we should try to get some ideas together[1]. How about one with perlperlperlperlperl printed around the neck area in a circle? You see where I'm going on this one? -- matt jones

RE: t-shirts

2001-02-21 Thread Matthew Jones
The image of a necklace made out of letters "p", "e", "r", "l" comes to mind. How early 90s. Oo! Handbag! Heh, musta missed that one, sorry chums. I just thought it was a nice Stone Roses reference. -- matt jones

RE: previous jobs

2001-02-01 Thread Matthew Jones
so who else has had cool non-IT jobs in the past? I walways had crappy non-IT jobs. The absolute worst was when I went to work in a plastics factory. As new boy, it fell to me to make sure that all the waste plastic was disposed of as efficiently as possible. Translated, that meant dragging

RE: the list

2001-01-31 Thread Matthew Jones
It's oh so quiet. After recent activity this is somewhat disconcerting. OK, just in the interests of making traffic, then, here's a picture of me as a baby: http://website.lineone.net/~vineleaf/sands/gfx/mattjones.jpg You see, you have ot get your priorities right at an early age. -- matt

RE: Technical Meeting Venues

2001-01-29 Thread Matthew Jones
Speaking from a personal standpoint, I really enjoy the technical meetings and think more of them would be really beneficial[2]. I think they represent a lot of what we are us to and show that we're all not just talk 'n booze. Hence I'm anxious to see them succeed. I'd like to be able to

RE: Technical Meeting Venues

2001-01-29 Thread Matthew Jones
the minute i cross the river, i can feel grimness coming upon me And they all talk funny. North of the river they're all called Hamish and Angus, and they wear flat caps and have whippets. Eeeh, lad, 'appen tha's f'gottent' pigeon-fancying[1] and breakfasts consisting entirely of clotted

RE: Feelers for London Open Source Convention

2001-01-18 Thread Matthew Jones
On Thu, Jan 18, 2001 at 08:03:52AM -0500, Mike Jarvis wrote: The fact you are recording is "What Billboard said was number one". *That* is a fact. Why they decided it was number one isn't the issue. How about if I put up a website wherein I disclose the fact: "This is what the object code

RE: Access Control Lists and Functions

2001-01-15 Thread Matthew Jones
In my case, Japanese was very much the latter. I have deep respect for anyone who can master it. The only Japanese I know: "Anata no zubon wa taihen kirena desu!" Not many applications. -- matt "What? I don't speak your crazy moon-language."

RE: Fwd: SPUG: ActivePerl 623

2001-01-05 Thread Matthew Jones
my vote the one, the only ... Charlie's Angels That was a fun film and entertaining but I need more that kung fu and breasts to make a good 90 mins... Why would anyopne need more than kung fu to enjoy a fillum? "Crouching Tiger - Hidden Dragon" is best film of 2000 for my money. Breasts are

RE: new years eve

2001-01-05 Thread Matthew Jones
This could be the ideal opportunity for that drunken Paranoia game we've been promising ourselves for so long. Yes, it *definitely* has to be drunken. It's been literally years since I played paranoia! It's by far the best RPG *ever*. It neatly sidesteps the whole "take the whole thing too

RE: Fwd: SPUG: ActivePerl 623

2001-01-05 Thread Matthew Jones
Why would anyopne need more than kung fu to enjoy a fillum? I dunno. Plot? shrug/ Here's my idea of a good plot: Wang Hoo: "Eight Castle-Smasher Fists! Feet on Seven Stars!" (sticks rigidly to form) Tsing Wa: "Left Hand Buddha Palm! Right Hand Buddha Fist!" (also sticks rigidly to form) A