---BeginMessage---
---BeginMessage---
An American tourist in London decides to skip the tour group and
explore the city on his own. He wanders around, seeing the sights,
occasionally stopping at a quaint pub to soak up the local culture,
chat with the lads, and have a pint of stout.
After
Subject: She don't care
Reportedly, the lady who wrote this letter is Pam Foster of Pamela
Foster and Associates in Atlanta. She's been in business since 1980
doing interior design and home planning. She recently wrote a letter
to a family member serving in Iraq. Please read.
Note: I don't
A Mafia Godfather finds out that his bookkeeper has screwed him for ten
million bucks. This bookkeeper is deaf. It was considered an
occupational
benefit, and why he landed the job in the first place, since it was
assumed
that a deaf bookkeeper would not be able to hear anything he'd ever have
My thanks to you!
I want to thank all of you who have taken the time and trouble to send
me your chain letters over the past two years. Thank you for making me
feel safe, secure, blessed, and wealthy.
Because of your concern...
I no longer can drink Coca Cola because it can remove toilet
NEWS FROM FRANCE
The AP and UPI reported that the French Government announced yesterday
that it has raised its terror alert level from Run to Hide.
The only two higher levels in France are Surrender and Collaborate.
The raise was precipitated by a recent fire which destroyed France's
white
Family story
An Auburn family of football supporters head out one Saturday to do
their
Christmas shopping. While in the sports shop the son picks up an Alabama
jersey and says to his older sister, I've decided to become an Alabama
fan
and I would like this for Christmas.
His big sister is
We were sitting in a fine restaurant when my wife looks over at a nearby
table and sees a man in a drunken stupor.
I said, I notice you've been watching that man for some time now.
Do you know him?
Yes, she replies, he's my ex-husband, and he has been drinking like
that since I left him
My primary residence is Saranac, Michigan, an extremely dull village of
about 1750 if you count the stray cats and a few runaway hogs. Most are
UM or MSU fans with a few for ND.
Beautiful downtown Saranac is about as exciting as arbin/opelika except
they have 2 BARS and an American Legion...
Subject: Solution for Republicans
The Republicans should back off and
let men marry men;
women marry women,
and totally legalize abortion.
In three generations there will be no Democrats!
. . . . . . . . . . . .
Subject: The Big Game
As a woman passed her daughter's closed bedroom
Subject: Whisper !!
A salesman is trying to call a client. The phone rings and their little
boy, in a whisper, says, Hello.
SALESMAN: Is your mommy there?
LITTLE BOY: (whisper) Yes.
SALESMAN: Can I speak with her?
LITTLE BOY: (whisper) She's busy.
SALESMAN: Is your daddy there?
LITTLE
Pat Smoot wrote...
The Lady Spartans made it to the final 4 as well. Congrats to all.
. . . . . . . . .
Thanks pla. I only live about 35 miles from MSU and both teams are the
main topic on TV and in the Newspapers. Then you add the hype of the
Magic Johnson championship era, the Pope and his
*Sunday School*
The lady was a Southern Baptist who attended services and taught
Sunday School every week. On one Sunday an out of town acquaintance, a
gentleman, was in the pew right behind her. He noted what a fine
looking woman she was.
While they were taking up the collection, the man
How about Michigan State over Kentucky in 2 OT.
I had BAMA all the way and lost, so State was my #2 Team. My son is an
Alum...
RollSpartansRoll -vo-
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Subject: Foreign Exchange
An Asian man walks into the currency exchange in New York with 2000 yen
and walks out with $ 72.
The following week, he walks in with 2000 yen and is handed $ 66.
He asks the teller why he got less money than he had gotten the previous
week.
The lady answers:
Jamie Watts wrote...
Donut furgit the TGIF Groaner
Ewer Powell,
Jamie
churs
. . . . . . . . . . . .
I will try... but after the dog and pony show GROANER we had today, I
will be hard pressed. Full court, that is. Oh well - Cheers -vo-
Re: Anniston... to include Oxford, Golden Springs, Jacksonville et al.
The entire area has one claim to fame, = Real Estate. Ever since Fort
McClellan closed, many businesses have shut down or moved, causing many
people to relocate. Plus, all persons (mil and civ) associated with the
MP and
Groaner #1 of 2...
There are two Mexicans who have been lost in the desert for weeks and
they're at death's door. As they stumble on, hoping for salvation in the
form of an oasis or something similar, they suddenly spy, through the
heat haze, a tree off in the distance.
As they get closer they
Joel Perry wrote...
Anniston? Who the hel lives in Anniston? Ain't that the place where they
burn that nuke-lear waste?
Yup - they got tons of nookie-waste to burn. Monsanto is still workin on
their po-lutten problems.
Who lives there... h... Once upon a time, Marie Hilley, Dr Nick,
Faye
yea or nay in the next day or so. Either way is fine
with me.
The damn snow up here is 2' deep, it is 8 above and I'm not in Anniston
or G. Shores, plus there is No BAMA Football... Guess I better have a
few more breers. RTR -Cheers -vo-
http://community-2.webtv.net/TIDE1/VOSOS
Subject: Arms -- Washington D.C. Iraq
According to http://www.casualties.org , there have been 88 hostile
fire
deaths caused by firearms since the beginning of hostilities in Iraq.
The
remainder of coalition deaths have been due to explosives or
accidents.
What does this mean? If you
This may be of interest/helpful... -vo-
MIKE WENDLAND: Sweet new weapon enters war on spam...
http://www.freep.com/money/tech/mwendland28e_20050128.htm
http://www.freep.com/money/tech/mwendland28e_20050128.htm
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From: Joel Perry [EMAIL PROTECTED]
She hasn't caught on that I turn the ruler around and measure from the
wrong end.
Hey Joel - You must have screwed up. My Grandpa told me many times...
Never marry a woman with big hands - they make your pecker look
small!
Cheers -vo-
Hey Krut - Come on up for a visit. See inclosed link for directions.
Cheers -vo-
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.
. . . . . . . . . .
I guarantee - BAMA 20 - lswho satan's 13...
RTR... Cheers -vo-
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For those interested. Hope this isn't a re-run and I missed the
original. RTR - Cheers... -vo-
GO to...
http://www.juiceenewsdaily.com/1004/news/haunted_alabama.html
http://community-2.webtv.net/TIDE1/TIDE1VOGRAM/
http://www.juiceenewsdaily.com/1004/news/haunted_alabama.html
I called him a few days ago and he said all is well --- EXCEPT his PC
is down and he's having one hell of a time getting it fixed. I didn't
mention it because I expected him back on line by now. HTH - Cheers
-vo-
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-headed bastards that need it.
Slef E.
. . . . . . . . . .
Jeff - You're a picture of my old slef. Pass in Review... -vo-
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to
Texas. Way folks out here feel, you'd have to tie a pork chop around
your neck just to get a dog to play with you. Well, and maybe Mollie
Ivins.
Russ Vaughn is a Vietnam veteran, Texan, and Poet Laureate of The
American Thinker
http://community-2.webtv.net/TIDE1/TIDE1VOGRAM
Check this out... http://community-2.webtv.net/TIDE1/UF15yds/
http://community-2.webtv.net/TIDE1/TIDE1VOGRAM/
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ALABAMA - 30
Utah State - 10
RollTideRoll -vo-
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Big Football Treat - Thursday - September 2
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Texas AM (+8.5) at UTAH - ESPN - 7:45 PM Eastern
UTEP (+26) at Arizona State - FOX Sports Net AZ - 10:00 PM Eastern
RTR -vo-
http://community-2.webtv.net/TIDE1/TIDE1VOGRAM
Slef wrote: Anybody home.
I are, and I are headed for the Daily Digest rat now. -vo-
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ago that
said they were starting this free program and using it as a training
vehicle to *improve the skills* of their Doctors that are providing this
type of treatment for the wounded from Iraq and Afghanastan.
RollTideRoll - Cheers... -vo-
http://community-2.webtv.net/TIDE1/TIDE1VOGRAM
BARNER FAN PREPS FOR SEASON
Follow this guy and see what he eats...???
http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_365440.html?menu=
RollTideRoll - Cheers... -vo-
http://community-2.webtv.net/TIDE1/TIDE1VOGRAM/
http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_365440.html?menu
the black horse don't know shit about cars!
. . . . . . . . . .
I'm tired of Groaners and Politics... It's time for *ALABAMA CRIMSON
TIDE FOOTBALL* !!
RollTideRoll - Cheers -vo-
http://community.webtv.net/TIDE1/RIPfatfill
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America... -vo-
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asked, But, what's with the flowers?
The man responded, When ya' break down they tell ya' to put flares
in
the
front and
flares in the back.I ain't never understood it neither.
. . . . . . . . . .
RollTideRoll... -vo-
http://community.webtv.net/TIDE1/RIPfatfill
-
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-vo-
http://community.webtv.net/TIDE1/RIPfatfill
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Photo of CPWB circa 1945... (Shula?) Cheers -vo-
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http://community-2.webtv.net/TIDE1/COACH/
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Thought some of you might be interested. See following link...
http://community-2.webtv.net/glosimerwings/college/
Tired of *politics*... Ready for FOOTBALL... -vo-
http://community-2.webtv.net/TIDE1/SOLDIER/
http://community-2.webtv.net/glosimerwings/college
, you ARE going to lengthen Ralph's legs, aren't you?
. . . . . . . . . .
Cheers... -vo-
http://community-2.webtv.net/TIDE1/SOLDIER/
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... Cheers -vo-
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.
The wife asked, What the hell are you doing?
The husband replied, I'm watching the ball game with my son-in-law.
...
RollTideRoll - It won't be long... Cheers -vo-
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the Marine, and have you three assholes call me the
aggressor?
...
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I get the Digest and don't know if this article has been posted. If
not... check it out.
http://www.al.com/sports/birminghamnews/index.ssf?/base/sports/1089710159192720.xml
RollTideRoll -vo-
http://community-2.webtv.net/TIDE1/SOLDIER/
http://www.al.com/sports/birminghamnews/index.ssf?/base
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- RollTideRoll - cheers -vo-
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they were Viagra.
The guy said WHAT! why these.
The dentist said they won't put you to sleep, but they will give you
something to hang on to while I pull your tooth.
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silent. The father moans in grief. The bartender sighs and
says...
That boy should have quit while he was a head.
cheers -vo-
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of the issues.
11:30pm - 'Free Saddam' pep rally.
11:59pm - Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
12:00am - Nomination of Democrat candidate.
.. END ..
cheers -vo-
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is the moral of the
story?
You'll love this
You can't kill two Birds with One Stone.
Good luck to myslef at the tables... cheers -vo-
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bag's and get out!' I told her.
What about your friend? asked the bartender.
I looked him straight in the eye and said, 'Bad dog!'
Woof, woof... cheers -vo-
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to snuff* etc.
After all, he said insiders described... to me that means that people
that really know the *facts* have told him that things ain't good...
Hope someone knows something other than Paul Balls making his usual
noise.
RTR - cheers -vo-
http://community-2.webtv.net/TIDE1/SOLDIER
or more things that you can wear on your feet that begin
with the letter S. Shoes, socks, sandals, sneakers, slippers, skis,
skates, snowshoes, stockings, stilts.
...
Did you Groan? cheers -vo-
http://community-2.webtv.net/TIDE1/SOLDIER
proudly stated Simple, I just pulled
them out of MYASS.
cheers -vo-
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walks around behind him, kisses him
tenderly behind the ear and says. This just ain't your day...
Now those 2 are really bAd !!! cheers -vo-
http://community-2.webtv.net/TIDE1/SOLDIER/
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RollTideFan - The University of Alabama Athletics
Most outside the South think of Alabama as a football school, but the
Crimson Tide is second only to Kentucky in SEC basketball success.
Read on... cheers -vo-
http://stanford.theinsiders.com/2/244288.html
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RollTideFan - The University of
out my neck and bit those babies just as hard as I
could.
So, the trainer exclaimed, that finished him off, did it?
No, but you'd be amazed how strong you get when you bite your own
balls!
cheers -vo-
http://community-2.webtv.net/TIDE1/SOLDIER
that! I'm dating Susan!
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
cheers -vo-
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!!
.
Oh yeah cheers -vo-
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porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the
huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a
wlohe.
Fcuknig amzanig huh?
...
cheers -vo-
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the gunge...
+ 8 seconds = She whispers in his ear It's called Blowjobs Revenge?
Oh deer, oh deer!! cheers -vo-
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Welcome
attractive blonde. I'd like her, he said.
I'm sure you would, sir, said the Madam. Then she gestured to a 92-year
old woman in the corner, but Ethel here has 67 years seniority and
she's next.
cheers -vo-
http://community-2.webtv.net/TIDE1/SOLDIER
Enzo's backyard in
Queens!
The Godfather asks the attorney: Well, what'd he say?
The attorney replies: He says you don't have the balls to pull the
trigger.
...
Free Initial Consultation
cheers -vo-
http://community-2.webtv.net/TIDE1/SOLDIER
Subject: Super Bowl Afterglow
President Bush called the Patriots and complemented them on a great
game.
Al Gore called the Panthers and said he thought they were robbed.
Bill Clinton called Janet Jackson.
RTR - cheers -vo-
__
Have A Nice Flight
As the airliner pushed back from the gate, the flight attendant gave the
passengers the usual information regarding seat belts, etc. Finally, she
said, Now sit back and enjoy your trip while your captain, Judith
Campbell, and crew take you safely to your destination.
Tom
Man from Texas
A man from Texas, driving a Volkswagen Beetle, pulls up next to a guy in
a Rolls Royce at a stop sign.
Their windows are open and he yells at the guy in the Rolls,Hey, you
got a telephone in that Rolls?
The guy in the Rolls says, Yes, of course I do. I got one too...
see? the
Ron Rice wrote...
CNN: Riots at Auburn University today
Just saw hundreds of Auburn people going nuts on CNN. They
were all in Toomer's Corner acting a fool. At first CNN said that the
Auburn people were happy because the president of Auburn had just been
fired. But, it was just reported
Pat Smoot wrote...
You have to be very careful how you explain things to kids. . .
A 5-year-old boy went to visit his grandmother one day. Playing with his
toys in her bedroom while grandma was dusting, he looked up and
said,Grandma, how come you don't have a boyfriend?
Grandma replied,
A HORSE IN THE BAR'
A man walked into a bar, sat down at the far end and had a drink. He
noticed there was a horse in the back of the bar room with a big
pot of
money on the floor in
front of it. What's up with that? He asked the bartender,
pointing at
the horse.
You gotta put a dollar
I get the Digest. Hope this hasn't been posted earlier. See following
link. heh-heh...
RTR - cheers -vo-
http://www.gomemphis.com/mca/football/article/0,1426,MCA_478_2591674,00.html
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RollTideFan - The University of Alabama Athletics
Three Cheers for TIDE
People never remember to write in about the good things a product does,
always the bad! So this is very refreshing!! With Important facts to
remember!!!
Dear TIDE,
I am writing to say what an excellent product you have! In fact,
about a month ago while at home, I
With football all but over, maybe some music will help get you thru the
winter.
Click here - http://www.pianoladynancy.com/wavs.htm
Cheers -VO-
http://community-2.webtv.net/TIDE1/VOSOS/
http://www.pianoladynancy.com/wavs.htm
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Arthur Andersen determine that his profit margin is $60 ?
Teaching Math in 2005:
El hachero vende un camion carga por $100.
La cuesta de produccion es...
**
Well, maybe it's not a Groaner after all?
Cheers -VO-
http://community-2.webtv.net/TIDE1/VOSOS
of more Americans killed in this
dangerous land.
It is clear! We must abandon California.
BTW - This is my 1st weekly TGIF Groaner - (Non) for 2004!
Cheers -VO-
http://community-2.webtv.net/TIDE1/VOSOS/
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RollTideFan - The University
WHAT!! - NO Christmas Bonus!! Poor thangs!!
Click here or below...
http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2003/writers/mike_fish/12/19/coaching.contracts/
Cheers -VO-
http://community-2.webtv.net/TIDE1/VOSOS/
http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2003/writers/mike_fish/12/19/coaching.contracts
chopping down the next tree
that is the right size for our living room?
That sounds good to me. I'm so tired I don't even care if we find one
that's decorated or not!
Cheers -VO-
http://community-2.webtv.net/TIDE1/VOSOS/
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This is the best ever. Tears me up
Turn on audio and enjoy the slide show.
God bless our troops. -vo-
http://www.atthewell.com/home/index.php
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Welcome to
Missed last week, so you must suffer thru two stupid groaners this
week. Y'all can forgive me this one time because it's the ...
*HOLIDAYS*...
...
Groaner for Friday, 19 Dec 03...
Nick the Dragon Slayer had a long-standing obsession to nuzzle the
beautiful Queen's
Oopsie... Forgot to include my *very important* sig/link on my post. I
know - So what!
Please see link below. Overnight FedX will be fine ... Thanks!
Cheers -VO-
http://community-2.webtv.net/TIDE1/VOSOS/
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RollTideFan - The University
Kurt wrote
http://www.borderlandnews.com/stories/sports/todaysstories/20031205-52864.shtml
Hay Hombre - I have three cees-ters you like very much
JUAREZ is your *Destiny* amigo
Cheers -VO-
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2 losers 2 day
.
* GOLF *
A foursome is waiting at the men's tee while another foursome of ladies
are hitting from the ladies tee. The ladies are taking their time and
when finally the last one is ready to hit the ball she hacks it about 10
feet, goes over to it and
LSU needs help from Syracuse...
http://www.sltrib.com/2003/Dec/12022003/sports/116345.asp
Cheers -VO-
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last day, and that I wanted to do something special for you. I asked
him what to give you.
He said, 'Screw him. Give him a dollar.'
Breakfast was my idea.
Cheers -VO-
http://community.webtv.net/TIDE1/BestBS
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Subject: How the Catholic Church works
There were two Catholic boys, Timothy Murphy and Secola Antonio, whose
lives paralleled each other in amazing ways.
In the same year Timothy was born in Ireland, Secola was born in Italy.
Faithfully they attended parochial school from kindergarten
Subject: A Little Pink One
A little old lady, well into her eighties, slowly enters the front door
of an erotic sex shop.
Obviously very unstable on her feet, she shakily hobbles the few feet
across the store to the counter. Finally she arrives at the counter,
grabbing it for support.
She
Now this is what I call a real football fanatic! (See article)
BAMA will kick aubarn's a$$ thru their elbows!
UA 20 - au 13 .. RTR -VO-
.
MITCH ALBOM: Better to sit in jail than miss the game
November 21, 2003
BY MITCH ALBOM
FREE PRESS COLUMNIST
The judge
Hot off the press!
By: Ward, Butch
November 21, 2003 7:46 AM
Iron
Bowl '03
by:
The Goat Man
The leaves have
fell and it's gettin' cold, It
.
.
RollMightyTideRoll
BAMA 24 - LSU 20
Cheers -VO-
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Q: How do you say Virgin in German?
A: Fitzgutentite
.
Well, at least it was short this time. Don't forget - Old Age and
Treachery will overcome Youth and Skill
*RollMightyTideRoll*
Cheers -VO-
http://community.webtv.net/TIDE1/BestBS
of the Bionic Booger Boy, Part 1'.
--James Taranto
.
** RollMightyTIDERoll **
Cheers -VO-
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Barbra Walters was doing a documentary on the customs of American
Indians.
After a tour of a reservation they were on, she was curious as to the
number of feathers in the headdresses.
She asked a brave who had only one feather in his headdress. His
reply was, one feather, one
squaw.
She
/TIDE1/Halloween
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- I have an *Itchy-Pussy* He replied, Lady, these
Foreign Cars all look alike to me - just point it out when we get to
it !!!
Roll-MightyTide-Roll BAMA 24 - utk 20
Cheers -VO-
http://community.webtv.net/TIDE1/Halloween
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RollTideFan
Pick your College - Mailbox shaped like a football helmet. See link
below. BTW - This catalog has a ton of wild junk etc
Cheers -VO-
http://community.webtv.net/TIDE1/Halloween
http://www.johnsonsmith.com/website/store/product_detail.asp?UID=2003102101331526item_no=50708+01keyword
, there isn't any toilet
paper or hand soap in
the ladies room!!
RollTideRoll - BAMA 27 - OleMiss 20... And that's the way it is!!
Cheers -VO-
http://community.webtv.net/TIDE1/Halloween
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RollTideFan - The University of Alabama Athletics
attended and asked the general to drop 'em. He did.
The medical officer placed the tape on the tip of the general's penis
and began to work back. My God! he said, where are your testicles?
Vietnam, the general replied !!
Cheers -VO-
http://community-2.webtv.net/TIDE1/TIDE1VOGRAM
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