"Once you've seen one strip shopping center, you've seen a mall."
On Wed, Mar 5, 2014 at 9:13 AM, Share Long <[email protected]> wrote: > > > LOL, Richard, thanks and keep 'em coming... > > > > > On Wednesday, March 5, 2014 7:39 AM, Pundit Sir <[email protected]> > wrote: > > "I used to own an origami shop. It folded." > > > On Tue, Mar 4, 2014 at 5:42 PM, Pundit Sir <[email protected]> wrote: > > "I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me." > > > On Mon, Mar 3, 2014 at 7:14 PM, Pundit Sir <[email protected]> wrote: > > "How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it." > > > On Mon, Mar 3, 2014 at 1:02 PM, Pundit Sir <[email protected]> wrote: > > "I know a guy who is addicted to brake fluid - he say he can stop anytime." > > > On Mon, Mar 3, 2014 at 8:11 AM, Pundit Sir <[email protected]> wrote: > > "A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned > veteran." > > > On Sun, Mar 2, 2014 at 9:44 PM, Pundit Sir <[email protected]> wrote: > > "Jokes about German sausage are the wurst." > > > On Sun, Mar 2, 2014 at 12:12 PM, Pundit Sir <[email protected]> wrote: > > "When chemists die, they barium." > > > On Sun, Mar 2, 2014 at 9:41 AM, Pundit Sir <[email protected]> wrote: > > "I tried to catch some fog. I mist." > > > On Wed, Dec 4, 2013 at 1:53 PM, Richard Williams <[email protected]>wrote: > > A skeptical anthropologist was cataloging South American folk remedies > with the assistance of a tribal Brujo who indicated that the leaves of a > particular fern were a sure cure for any case of constipation. > > When the anthropologist expressed his doubts, the Brujo looked him in > the eye and said, > > "Let me tell you, with fronds like these, you don't need enemas." > > > On Wed, Dec 4, 2013 at 7:29 AM, Richard Williams <[email protected]>wrote: > > There were three Indian squaws. > > One slept on a deer skin, one slept on an elk skin, and the third slept > on a hippopotamus skin. All three became pregnant. The first two > each had a baby boy. The one who slept on the hippopotamus skin > had twin boys. > > This just goes to prove that...the squaw of the hippopotamus is equal > to the sons of the squaws of the other two hides. > > > On Tue, Dec 3, 2013 at 1:34 PM, Richard Williams <[email protected]>wrote: > > A famous Viking explorer returned home from a voyage and found his name > missing from the town register. His wife insisted on complaining to the > local civic official who apologized profusely saying, "I must have taken > Leif > off my census." > > > On Tue, Dec 3, 2013 at 12:43 PM, Share Long <[email protected]> wrote: > > > Richard, imho these are very good for preventing dementia and or > Alzheimers (-: > > > > > On Tuesday, December 3, 2013 12:25 PM, Richard Williams < > [email protected]> wrote: > > An Indian chief was feeling very sick, so he summoned the medicine man. > > After a brief examination, the medicine man took out a long, thin strip of > elk rawhide and gave it to the chief, telling him to bite off, chew,and > swallow one inch of the leather every day. > > After a month, the medicine man returned to see how the chief was > feeling. > > The chief shrugged and said, "The thong is ended, but the malady lingers > on." > > > On Mon, Dec 2, 2013 at 1:29 PM, Richard Williams <[email protected]>wrote: > > A thief broke into the local police station and stole all the toilets > and urinals, leaving no clues. A spokesperson was quoted as > saying, "We have absolutely nothing to go on." > > > On Mon, Dec 2, 2013 at 12:08 PM, Richard Williams <[email protected]>wrote: > > Back in the 1800's the Tate's Watch Company of Massachusetts wanted to > produce other products, and since they already made the cases for watches, > they used them to produce compasses. > > The new compasses were so bad that people often ended up in Canada or > Mexico rather than California . > > This, of course, is the origin of the expression,"He who has a Tate's is > lost!" > > > On Mon, Dec 2, 2013 at 8:22 AM, Richard Williams <[email protected]>wrote: > > A marine biologist developed a race of genetically engineered dolphins > that could live forever if they were fed a steady diet of seagulls. > > One day, his supply of the birds ran out so he had to go out and trap > some more. On the way back, he spied two lions asleep on the road. > > Afraid to wake them, he gingerly stepped over them. Immediately, he was > arrested and charged with transporting gulls across sedate lions for > immortal porpoises. > > > On Sun, Dec 1, 2013 at 6:38 PM, Richard J. Williams > <[email protected]>wrote: > > King Ozymandias of Assyria was running low on cash after years of war > with the Hittites. His last great possession was the Star of the > Euphrates, > the most valuable diamond in the ancient world. Desperate, he went to > Croesus, the pawnbroker, to ask for a loan. > > Croesus said, "I'll give you 100,000 dinars for it". > > "But I paid a million dinars for it," the King protested. "Don't you know > who I am? I am the king!" > > Croesus replied, "When you wish to pawn a Star, makes no difference > who you are." > > > On 12/1/2013 3:46 PM, Richard J. Williams wrote: > > Evidence has been found that William Tell and his family were avid > bowlers. Unfortunately, all the Swiss league records were destroyed in a > fire. And, so we'll never know for whom the Tells bowled. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
